"Episode 2 - Loyalty"
The Amazon Jungle Friday, April 14th 2017
~We see Chaotic and the Paradigm tribe arriving four hours late…that’s like half of the lord of the rings trilogy. The Hall of Fame boat appears with the OCW legends hitting the Amazonian turf~
Mario Maurako: It was great, they flew us into Rio and we saw the sights. Stayed in five star hotels and were each paid, for this show, the equivalent of one year’s salary for…let’s just say a guy like Chaotic.
Paul Paras: I concur, it was a perfect introduction made even better by the lack of Bifford or Syren’s typical inclusion.
Chaotic: I was set up
~Chaotic says through his mask~
~We see Chaotic fighting with everyone. Vargas drinking whiskey, Lurrr complaining about beer and Mario Maurako plotting to vote out someone on the other tribe. MASS HYSTERIA~
~Highlights of the Paradigm’s Immunity victory air. The only highlights of the Savage Tribe are those of Bob Grenier napping in the water, on top of the raft, in the sand…across Meyhu’s shoulder~
~We ooohh at Jock’s lame metaphor. We then see a near unanimous voting block for Bob Grenier. Grenier is carried away from staff as he sleeps in a way every adult should feel envy towards~
SAVAGE TRIBE – DAY 3 – POST TRIBAL
CJ O’Donnell: Fucking ridiculous…I’m still disgusted. We just had to vote out an OCW Champion due to a lack of passion and effort. Bob could have been a real asset. I’m furious. We need to get our shit together or those vets over there…even if they are old…are going to build an insurmountable lead.
~CJ is talking really loud. Most of the tribe can probably hear him. TIO comes into view and ushers him deeper into the jungle. The two have a spirited discussion~
TIO: You need to calm the fuck down. This isn’t boot camp. You’ve got to be nice to these people, CJ.
CJ O’Donnell: Fuck that, I’m an asshole. I’m not going to change just because I’m in some South American jungle. Bob got what he deserved and that should be a lesson to everyone else in the tribe. Pull your weight or go the fuck home.
TIO: I don’t disagree with what you’re saying. I’m just advising to dial it back a little.
~It appears that CJ’s asshole scale goes up to 11~
TIO: Alright? Good. Now I’m going to get some sleep.
~CJ follows TIO out of the jungle. Pryde’s mask is looking in their direction~
TIO: Had to take a piss. Jungle is fucking scary. Black panthers at night, yikes…talk about sneaking up on you. Thanks for keeping watch, CJ!
~TIO and CJ find a place to get comfortable~
~The Savage Tribe begins to stir. CJ is already up. He heads toward the water to take a piss. Annie is pretty much right next to his legs. CJ doesn’t ‘notice’ her. Morbidus sits up and looks into the sky, shaking his fist at the sun~
Robert Morbidus: Confounded burning sphere in the sky!
~A number of dead animals fall in front of Morbidus. His attention instantly diverts~
Robert Morbidus: Mmmmmm
Rebel: I thought you might, you know, want to drain these for us
Robert Morbidus: Why yes, it is about time that I fed. Thank you, Rebel.
~Morbidus dives in. We turn away. CJ finishes ruining some fish’s morning. He pulls his pants up and steps over Annie. Annie groans, CJ looks down~
CJ O’Donnell: Oh, Annie, hey, I didn’t know you were down there. You need to be more careful…could have been the accidental recipient of a golden shower.
Annie Alvarez: What time is it?
~Annie looks to the east and sees the sun barely over the horizon. She gets nervous~
Annie Alvarez: What the hell is the sun doing over THERE? Is the world ending?
CJ O’Donnell: It’s just after daybreak…that’s where the sun rises.
Annie Alvarez: Ughhhhh…I hate this game
~In an overt act of frustration, Annie falls to her side. Meyhu walks by with something that, we guess could be used for fishing in his hands~
Matt Meyhu: I’m catching a big fish today.
CJ O’Donnell: Good luck with that
Matt Meyhu: In that POOL over there…looks kind of deep…a potential spot for DROWNING.
CJ O’Donnell: LET THE BODIES HIT THE FLOOOOOOR
~Meyhu gives CJ and strange look. Annie slaps her forehead~
Matt Meyhu: No fish for this man.
~Meyhu heads to the drowning pool. CJ walks back toward the fire. Pryde is stoking it a bit. His focus is unrivaled~
Pryde: We haven’t discussed last night’s voting. Someone went against the agreed upon block and wrote Annie’s name down.
~Annie yells from the distance while hopelessly trying to fall back asleep~
Annie Alvarez: YEA! WHICH ONE OF YOU ASSHOLES DID THAT?!
TIO: That’s an excellent point…we all agreed to vote Bob out but someone went against that agreement.
~Canon emerges from a shelter that we’ve yet to see for some reason. He stretches with a smile on his face. He spots Meyhu in the distance, heading to the DROWNING POOL~
Curt Canon: GOOD LUCK FISHING MATT!
~Meyhu, with his back turned, raises an arm in the air in acknowledgement. Canon reaches the rest of the tribe and stands around with his hands on his hips. He nods his head anxiously~
Curt Canon: Soooo…what are we talking about?
CJ O’Donnell: Trying to figure out who voted for Annie
Curt Canon: It was Bob, remember? His arm was all like…
~Canon mimes Bob’s arm hitting Annie’s leg. In doing so, he hits Morbidus in the back. Morbidus turns around with blood all over his face. Canon jumps back~
Curt Canon: YIKES
TIO: Hey, wait a minute…where is Checkers…you don’t think HE voted for Annie, do you?
~A shrilling scream tears through the jungle. Checkers flies into view, landing on Canon’s shoulder. He shakes his fist angrily at TIO while sticking out his tongue. TIO holds his hands up~
TIO: Sorry, Checkers…I meant no offense.
~Checkers nods, leans forward and gives TIO a high five. MJ Bell appears, taking a seat. She’s tired and a bit cranky~
MJ Bell: Whoever did it probably noticed Annie didn’t help one bit when we built the shelter.
~MJ rubs her tired eyes as Annie sits up and gives MJ that “Bitch, please” look. MJ realizes she’s got the morning blues and corrects her error~
MJ Bell: Sorry, Annie…you wanna help me grab some water?
~Annie agrees and MJ stands. CJ starts to discern some scandalous behavior~
CJ O’Donnell: You ever notice when they have to get water Meyhu is always fishing?
~Most of the guys around the campfire snicker, including Checkers. MJ rolls her eyes~
MJ Bell: Gross, CJ. Not everything is about sex. Plus, I have a boyfriend.
~Annie stands and accompanies MJ. CJ looks at everyone~
CJ O’Donnell: Boyfriend is just code for hard to get.
~Pryde stirs the fire a bit more~
~It’s mid-morning. Chaotic is bathing in the river with his mask still on. He’s singing WE ARE THE CHAMPIONS. We hope he stopped at some point during the evening. Josie is washing her feet while seated in the sand. She looks at Chaotic as an annoyed older sister would look at their psycho little brother. Brooks enters the picture, reaching into the water to splash some fresh, cool liquid on her hot face~
Josie Barnes: I wish that mask came with a muzzle.
~Julliet spots a crab in the water and snatches it quickly~
Julliet Brooks: I think he sounds quite nice.
~She just bites right into the living creature. Bits of shell fall into Josie’s hair. Josie sighs and knocks the crab out of her hair and starts to walk off. Julliet looks her way with crab around her mouth~
Julliet Brooks: Hey, I didn’t mean to upset you. Look, crab works GREAT in your hair.
~Julliet puts some crab in her hair. It doesn’t look great. But she’s so nice we pretend that it does. Barnes shrugs~
Josie Barnes: I’m not mad at you…it’s just THAT guy over there. He’s so annoying.
~She points at Chaotic who is still singing in the river with his mask on. Lurrr steps into the frame looking like a champion~
Lurrr: Morning, ladies…feels great to be victorious, right? I’ve been a champion since birth. Just comes naturally to me…now, if only we could get some beer out here…
~PerZag is leaning against a tree. Maurako is nearby messing with the fire. They both overhear the slight bickering going on between Brooks and Barnes. Maurako raises an eyebrow in PerZag’s direction~
Mario Maurako: Should we dig a mud pit for the two ladies to hash out their differences?
PerZag: It’s only logical, right? I’ll grab a shovel.
~Zag realizes they are in the jungle and have no shovel. So he starts digging with his hands. Maurako hustles over and helps out, digging into the sand. Vargas stands over, taking a sip of whatever the heck is in his flask~
Chad Vargas: What the hell are you guys doing?
~Maurako and Zag continue to dig furiously. Maurako answers without looking up~
Mario Maurako: Digging a mud pit so Barnes and Brooks can wrestle
~Vargas throws his flask to the side and drops to his knees. He digs alongside. In the background we see Paras performing a morning routine of yoga far away from where the girls were arguing. Barnes walks up with her arms folded~
Josie Barnes: GUYS! We weren’t bickering…we were just talking.
~All three men sit up, on their knees, breathing heavily. Sweat slides down their foreheads and cheeks. You have to give it to them…the hole is pretty damn deep given the amount of time they had been digging~
PerZag: Yea? Well I have no interest in watching you two. I want to see a mask versus face paint match inside the pit.
~Vargas frowns and stands up~
Chad Vargas: Fuck that shit. You can dig this hole your fucking self.
~Maurako stands up as well~
Mario Maurako: Uh, yea, I’m with Vargas on this one.
~Zag shrugs and gets up with Mario. They sit next to the fire. Vargas joins them, gathering his flask. Paras appears, looking relaxed and centered~
Chad Vargas: Fucking mud pit
Paul Paras: Speaking of mud, how about that time Perfectly Marvelous perfectly pulverized Mississippi Mud and won the OCW Tag Team Titles? That was our first major OCW victory, and here we are, all these years later, still bringing victory to the team. Perfect.
~He continues to wax nostalgic, speaking of OCW lore. He mentions Everlast, Extremely Dangerous, Sex and Violence and, of course, TGO. Everyone has a good chuckle at TGO’s expense~
Paul Paras: The Perfect One is proud to be a part of this tribe. You all saw how the Savages fell apart when it came to crunch time. We cannot and will not do the same. Let's get to training.
~He pats Zag and Vargas on the back as Maurako smiles, remembering the victories in their past which contributed to their Hall of Fame inductions. Paras is about to continue when he notices everyone looking toward the mud pit. TLS is looking down into it as Chaotic has finally finished bathing, heading their way~
Paul Paras: OR…we can see what’s beneath that mask. Then train!
~TLS looks at Chaotic~
Chaotic: What are you looking at you paint covered FREAK
~TLS nods, quietly and looks over at the group~
TLS: Yea, let’s do it.
~It’s later in the afternoon and all the members of the Paradigm Tribe seem extremely anxious and slightly bored. Vargas struggles running back from the river with a flask full of water. He’s huffing and puffing…covered in sweat…very fatigued. He reaches the pit and pours his flask into it. He looks over at Maurako with hope~
Mario Maurako: Yea, that looks good to me…Paul?
Paul Paras: Perfect
Chad Vargas: About fucking time…you assholes better not fucking vote me off. I didn’t even wanna watch this shit.
~TLS and Chaotic position in the mud pit. Barnes sits next to PerZag. Lurrr yells “FIGHT!” and they begin to wrestle. Brooks sits down enjoying more raw crab. The fight goes on for a bit until TLS wins. Everybody cheers~
Lurrr: Alright! Remove that fucking mask!
Chad Vargas: Ladies, you might want to turn your heads. This won’t be pretty…
~Chaotic sighs. He’s covered in mud. He emerges from the put and reaches back. He unties his mask, lowers his head and rips it off. The tribe gasps~
Chad Vargas: Son of a bitch
Mario Maurako: Seriously?
Lurrr: Are you fucking kidding me?
Paul Paras: Hmm, smart
TLS: Haha
~Chaotic lifts his head to reveal…ANOTHER MASK. Barnes stands up~
Josie Barnes: Yea, I’ve had enough of this
PerZag: I’m going to grab some bananas, you want to accompany me?
Josie Barnes: Sure
~Barnes and Zag walk off together. TLS eyes them and yells out~
TLS: Consumption of too many bananas (potassium) can lead to hyperkalemia..be careful.. josie barnes look like she is showing symptoms . Signs are, feeling nauseated...
~TLS’ voice trails off. Barnes shoots him the finger. He shrugs and looks at everyone else~
TLS: Alright then…strip poker in my hut. No women allowed. Plenty of grub worms for everyone.
~He turns and walks toward his wild and crazy hut. Nobody follows~
~Some inspirational music is playing. The type of stuff you’d listen to before hitting the gridiron. Matt Meyhu’s slapdash fishing pole is broken in half, floating away. Meyhu has fashioned a spear and has his sights set on a very haughty, arrogant fish. The fucker is swimming right next to him. The fish is almost mocking him. Meyhu will not STAND for this. He throws the spear…everything pauses. The music stops. It’s a moment of HIGH drama. TRUMPETS play as the fat fish goes belly up~
Matt Meyhu: YES!
~Meyhu snares the fish out of the water and gives it a good inspection~
Matt Meyhu: Hell yea, that’s big enough for possibly TWO Meyhu meals.
~He packs up and makes his way back to camp. He walks by MJ, Annie and Canon. Canon and Annie are chatting about wine. It’s a conversation Meyhu has little interest in. TIO spots the fish and rushes over~
TIO: DAMN! Good job, man! The tribe is gonna be so…
~Meyhu’s expression drops. TIO turns around. CJ is carrying a crate of seafood into the campsite. Meyhu shakes his head~
TIO: Fuck it, we’ll go build our own fire and eat this fish
~They head out of view. Annie is growing fond of Checkers. MJ is snaring some water. Checkers hears another monkey scream. He rolls his eyes and hops of Canon’s shoulders. He greets another monkey at the edge of the jungle. It looks like they are arguing. Checkers rolls his eyes and waves his monkey arms around furiously~
Annie Alvarez: What are they saying?
Curt Canon: That’s Chess, his more successful older brother.
Annie Alvarez: Sounds like a prick
~Canon nods, continuing to listen~
Curt Canon: Apparently Chess is jealous that Checkers has a human companion and he doesn’t. It sounds like Checkers is…oh my…I think I’ll just keep that bit of information to myself.
~Chess screams happily and scurries toward the campsite. Checkers smiles and rubs his monkey hands together before hopping onto Canon’s shoulder. MJ turns around with some water~
Annie Alvarez: Good job, MJ! Hey, Checkers….you think you can find us some fruit to make wine with?
~Checkers leaps off of Canon’s shoulder and disappears into the jungle. He’s in a very good mood all of a sudden. After a while they re-enter camp with water and fruit. Annie talks some feminine nonsense about making wine. She bites into something that resembles a kiwi. Some chopping and banging grab everyone’s attention. Morbidus is fastening the shelter. A dead monkey is lying next to his body, drained of blood. It’s CHESS. Annie looks at Canon with a mouth full of fruit~
Annie Alvarez: Is that…
Curt Canon: Law of the jungle, I guess
CJ O’Donnell: You look like you’re REALLY enjoying sucking on that kiwi
~Annie rolls her eyes~
~TLS emerges from his hut with an empty bowl that was once full of grub worms. He tosses it at Chaotic~
TLS: I need some more grub worms
Chaotic: FUCK YOU
~Chaotic throws the bowl at TLS. He catches it and calmly sets it back down by his hut. Maurako appears to be extremely bored and somewhat famished. He places some foreign object to his ear and makes a phone call. Suddenly a parachute falls into camp holding a shark cage and spear. Mario looks around with an over the top, surprised expression~
Mario Maurako: Where did THIS come from?
~Paras spots his legendary tag partner and, more importantly, his newly acquired toys. Mauarko points the spear at Paras. Paras stands up and politely excuses himself. He snares the spear and they carry the cage into the jungle~
Chad Vargas: The hell was that?
Lurrr: If it doesn’t have to do with alcohol or a guaranteed OCW title shot I really don’t give a shit.
Julliet Brooks: Would either one of you like crabs?
~Lurrr and Vargas lean back like ‘wtf!’ We turn our attention to Barnes and PerZag who are off in the jungle, enjoying each other’s company. They have found common ground…their hatred for TLS and Chaotic~
~A few hours pass. TLS is asleep in the dirt. Josie Barnes is back, avoiding TLS and Chaotic. She’s quietly, by the river, trying a piece of crab in her hair…hoping to get a clear enough reflection to make a determination. Julliet Brooks munches on a snake, crab mixture. This woman is something. Paras and Maurako emerge from the jungle and toss a 400lb Bull Shark carcass near the fire. Vargas and Lurrr jump back. Bradley Carrington, who’s been quiet this entire time is startled. Paras drives the stake through the shark, getting ready to roast it~
Mario Maurako: Dinner is served, boys
~Chaotic has some kind of sparkler. We’re not sure how or why, but he’s playing with them. TLS begins to squirm in his sleep. He mumbled, swats his hands. He sits up, his eyes shoot open. He yells~
TLS: NUKE THE FRIDGE
~There is an awkward moment of silence before everyone goes back to doing their previous tasks. Suddenly, an unnerved PerZag leaps out of the jungle~
PerZag: DO NOT go that way…there is a giant tribal orgy about two miles in that direction.
~TLS LEAPS to his feet and heads in that direction while whistling. He disappears into the foliage. Zag spots Barnes…he feels his hair. He snaps his fingers and rushes into the jungle. We follow, he digs up a bottle of “~” OCW hair gel! The hair gel made famous by Randy and Ricky Valdez…Awe.Some!! Zag squirts some into his hand, it is thick, white and opaque. He rubs it into his hair~
PerZag: Need to look my best.
~Zag buries the bottle back into the dirt and looks down~
PerZag: Thanks Ricky and Randy…and especially you, Rachel.
~He emerges from the jungle. His hair is ridiculous looking. It’s matted down and incredibly hard. Lurrr looks up~
Lurrr: The fuck did you do to your hair? Is it frozen?
Chad Vargas: Looks like you blew a giant load in there, man. It’s only been a few days…potent mother fucker.
~Zag reaches up and feels around. He becomes furious. He immediately knows where to place the blame saying, “TLS!” He runs toward the river. Josie tries to stop him~
PerZag: Not right now!
~He shields his hair and dives into the river. Josie shrugs and heads back to camp~
~It’s Immunity Challenge Day. The Savage tribe awakens with determination. Pryde is on his feet, ready to go~
Pryde: Alright, this is our shot at redemption. We cannot lose the first two challenges.
Rebel: We’re going to give them some payback, for sure
~The rest of the tribe stands around, ready for the challenge. CJ stands on a nearby log so that he is above them all~
CJ O’Donnell: Alright everyone…in a few minutes we will head to the next challenge. This is one we HAVE to win. So I want everyone to give it everything they’ve got, NO excuses. We all saw what happened to Bob.
~CJ hops down and begins walking toward the challenge. Meyhu shrugs at TIO and they follow with everyone else filing in behind~
~It’s early, early in the morning. The sun has yet to rise. TLS emerges from the jungle, disappointed. Carrington, asleep by the fire, rolls over and spots TLS~
TLS: I’ve seen better orgies on a night club dance floor. That was a joke. Oh well, I’m going to get a few hours of sleep. Care to join me? Clothing optional, of course.
~Carrington groans and rolls back over, perfectly fine where he is. TLS heads to his hut and enters. We see his shirt and then shorts fly out. It’s obvious he’s getting comfortable~
~A few hours pass. Everyone is awake. PerZag’s hair appears to have been thoroughly, thoroughly washed. TLS emerges from his hut, dressed. They stand around, preparing for the challenge~
Chaotic: Let’s fucking kick their asses!
Josie Barnes: You are SO annoying
Chaotic: Yea? Well you’re a stupid bitch!
Mario Maurako: People! Let’s all relax…we need to work as a team today. Now, before we head to the challenge…would anybody like some extra shark?
~A few people reach in and rip apart some meat. Vargas hands Brooks a piece, she gladly accepts. He makes some conversation~
Chad Vargas: May I inquire toward the name of that haunting aroma radiating from your neckline?
Julliet Brooks: It’s called Midnight Rose, it’s made by
~Vargas has already lost interest. I mean, come on, we’re talking about women’s perfume here. Brooks doesn’t seem to care…more flattered than anything. She finishes her shark and notices a break in the conversations and weird behavior~
Julliet Brooks: Well, I’m as ready as I’ll ever be. I hope the other team is ready to get destroyed again.
Chaotic: Let’s do thissssssssssssssss!!!!
~Chaotic takes off running into the jungle. Paras pulls out the map and points to the challenge location. Maurako shakes his head and shows Lurrr~
Lurrr: Mother FUCKER. Will somebody go and catch that guy…he’s running in the opposite direction!
Jock Reasoning: You all think you’re so clever, don’t you? You think you can just SNEAK stuff by ole Jock and Jimmy Buffet. Well, let me tell you something…you’re…NOT…clever, that is. Savage Tribe, I know about you having Red Lobster deliver a crate of seafood to your camp.
~The Savage Tribe begins to murmur and look around. They avoid eye contact with CJ O’Donnell~
Jock Reasoning: Because of your reckless actions Jimmy has pulled Landshark beer from ALL Red Lobster locations. I hope you’re happy…you need to stop and think about your actions next time.
~The Paradigm Tribe, feeling high off their victory, laughs with Chaotic leading the arrogant brigade~
Chaotic: Haha, fucking losers! Red Lobster sucks, anyway!
Jock Reasoning: Oh, you think I’m finished? Not even close! Paradigm Tribe…I’m DOUBLY mad at you all.
~The Paradigm Tribe members all look at the ground, sheepishly. Aside from Chaotic who flashes gang signs at Jock. Jock is too suburban to have any idea what he’s doing~
Jock Reasoning: Bringing a CELLULAR telephone onto the island to order a special delivery of survival items. I…I don’t even know where to begin. So, I’m just gonna ask that the culprit come clean…whoever brought a cell phone onto this island, toss it into the dirt right now…
~Nobody budges~
Jock Reasoning: Okay, fine…if that cell phone doesn’t hit the dirt in TEN seconds, I’m giving Chaotic unlimited immunity.
~INSTANTLY ten cell phones hit the ground. Jock is at a loss for words~
Jock Reasoning: You ALL had cell phones? Each and every one of you? Geezus…even YOU, Chaotic? Why would you throw yours out?
Chaotic: Wait…you said I’d get immunity if I did, right?
Chad Vargas: It was the exact opposite, dipshit
Chaotic: FUCK! Can we do this again?
Jock Reasoning: Nope…I’m confiscating these cellular telephones. And then, we will begin the challenge. I hope you all think long and hard about your actions in the meantime.
~The phones have been gathered. Two tables are set up. Atop each table is an object covered with a blanket. The tribes are situated in a line. Jock stands in between the two tables~
Jock Reasoning: Okay, this is a challenge that will test your mental strength. In those bowls, which are covered by cloth, are giant, fat, oily, disgusting looking grub worms
~Vargas pukes~
Lurrr: Thanks, JOCK
Chad Vargas: Nah, we’re good…withdrawals are just kicking in…continue Jock!
Jock Reasoning: One by one, a member from each tribe will approach the bowl, remove the cloth and eat the two grubworms within. The first participant who is unable to perform the task costs their team the challenge and immunity. Clear enough? Okay, great…Paradigm Tribe, I’ll take that idol back and you’ll need to sit someone out…who’s it gonna be?
~Before anybody can pick, Lurrr yells out~
Lurrr: That would be me. I ain’t eating that shit.
Jock Reasoning: Alright then, let’s have the first two competitors step up
~Chad Vargas and Rebel step up. They remove their cloth. The grub worms are every bit as disgusting as they imagined. Vargas swallows hard while Rebel looks squeamish~
Matt Meyhu: Nothing more rebellious than eating a worm!
~Meyhu’s words of encouragement seem to comfort Rebel~
Jock Reasoning: GO!
~Vargas and Rebel grab their worms and throw them into their mouth. They chew and chew and chew. Rebel opens his mouth and sticks out his tongue. Jock nods and the Savage Tribe cheers. Chad struggles a bit, his eyes water…he heaves. He finally swallows and opens his mouth, sticking out his tongue. Jock confirms. The Paradigm Tribe cheers~
Lurrr: Good job, Vargas!
Chad Vargas: Fuck that was tough on a dry stomach
~Next up we see MJ Bell and TLS. MJ looks at TLS…he smiles and waves. She rolls her eyes and focuses on the squirmy worms in front of her~
Jock Reasoning: GO!
~MJ has trouble picking them up, finding them totally disgusting. TLS just watches and laughs. Finally she’s able to pick them up and throw them into her mouth. She nearly spits them out. Her tribe cheers her on. She starts to chew and gets out a “oh my gosh…” while keeping the contents from spilling…she’s totally disgusted. TLS reaches in and grabs one. He’s staring at MJ. She looks over and he calmly bites one in half. She nearly pukes~
TIO: Come on, Madeline!
Curt Canon: Who the hell is that?
TIO: MJ!
Curt Canon: Oh, okay...COME ON, MARALYN!
~TLS finishes the second half of his first worm. He grabs the other and twirls in in the air like you would when feeding a kid. MJ places her hand to the side of her face, shielding TLS. She continues to struggle. She rushes to the side of the table and leans over a trash can. Why there is a trash can for puking when they are in the jungle is BEYOND ME. But it’s there. She holds it in and returns to her position. She finally swallows. Tears are streaming down her face from the struggle….she opens her mouth and shows. Jock confirms. She looks at TLS who is casually chewing the second worm. He opens his mouth and plays with the mush. She PUKES all over him~
TLS: Hey! I got her…she loses, right?
Jock Reasoning: Nope, I’m sorry…but I cleared her before she vomited
Chaotic: I CALL COLLUSION…CHEATING!
~TLS just shrugs. The vomit all over his body doesn’t really faze him. He heads to the log where Lurrr and Vargas are sitting. They scoot WAYYYY down. MJ makes her way back to the Savage Tribe…they give her words of encouragement…she says things like “I hate that guy.” Next up steps Paul Paras and CJ O’Donnell. They stare each other down, both looking very serious~
Jock Reasoning: GO!
~Both men dive in. It’s as though they are in direct competition. Paras throws his in first, CJ is right behind. CJ chews faster. They keep an eye on one another. They finish at the exact same time, sticking their tongues out~
Jock Reasoning: I’d say it was a tie
Paul Paras: I know you’re being nice, Jock. We all know I pulverized this punk.
CJ O’Donnell: Keep being delusional. We all know why you guys never come back…you can’t compete in this era. And, for those keeping score, I finished first.
Paul Paras: Right, scurry on back to that losing tribe of yours.
~CJ grows angry and looks like he wants to punch Paras. TIO and Meyhu drag him back into the pack~
Jock Reasoning: NEXT
~Maurako steps up. TIO steps ahead for the Savage Tribe~
Jock Reasoning: Whoa, whoa! We are NOT having this
~Meyhu and Rebel pull him back into the Tribe. Meyhu takes his spot. He stands next to Maurako…the two size one another up~
Mario Maurako: Marvelous Mario Maurako…you might have heard of me
Matt Meyhu: Marvelous, huh? I thought about using that moniker years ago when I was breaking in…but realized it sounded like over compensation.
Mario Maurako: Ohhh, I’m so going to kick your ass
Jock Reasoning: GO!
~Like Paras and CJ before them…they dive right in and eat like it’s a race. And, like their predecessors, they finish in a tie. Meyhu, arrogantly throws his arms in the air as Jock clears them both. He turns his back to Maurako and heads to the Savage Tribe, looking victorious. Maurako shakes his head and heads back to the Paradigm Tribe~
Mario Maurako: I want to kick that guy’s ass
Jock Reasoning: NEXT!
~TIO and Chaotic step up~
TIO: They get Paras and Maurako…and I get…you
Chaotic: Haha, Incredible OAF
TIO: Durrr, good one
Chaotic: The Idiotic Ogre!
~The Savage Tribe laughs, along with TIO. Chaotic nods, thinking his put downs are creating the laughter…which, they are, just not in the way he thinks~
Jock Reasoning: GO!!
~TIO snares the two worms and throws them into his mouth. Chaotic grabs his two worms and moves them toward his mouth…but the mask blocks them. He tries again and again, but he can’t get them in. TIO finishes and sticks out his tongue. Jock clears him. Chaotic continues to ram the worms into the cloth of his mask~
Lurrr: Take off the FUCKING MASK YOU WEIRDO
Chad Vargas: For fucks sake, man! Take it off!
TLS: Yea, take it all off
~Barnes rolls her eyes at TLS. Jock shakes his head~
Jock Reasoning: I think you need to remove that mask
Chaotic: How about I cut them up into teeny, tiny pieces and I can squish them in through the microscopic air holes? Does ANYBODY have a Knife?
~A giant knife flies through the air and bites into the table, right in front of Chaotic. It’s a perfect throw. We look from where it came and see THE KNIFE MAN standing amidst the bushes holding his giant knife. Everyone shrieks. He jumps with fright and runs into the foliage like a frightened animal. Jock grabs the knife and tosses it over his shoulder. A crew member yells in pain~
Jock Reasoning: No, we are not doing that. And sorry about The Knife Man, everyone…he’s here in case someone gets injured…or a camera breaks…he is our medic SLASH mechanic, after all. Chaotic…you HAVE to remove that mask or else this challenge is over.
Mario Maurako: DUDE, REMOVE THE MASK
PerZag: Remove it or I will be forced to fucking annihilate you
Josie Barnes: This is so stupid…just remove the mask, nobody cares!
Chad Vargas: REMOVE THE FUCKING MASK
TLS: Or, ya know, don’t.
Chaotic: The mask stays on, Jock!
Jock Reasoning: The Savage Tribe WINS immunity!!!
~The entire Savage Tribe jumps with joy. Checkers is especially excited…so much so that he pisses all over Curt’s shoulder. But it’s okay, because they are winners. CJ walks up and snatches the Buffet immunity idol and leads his tribe away. The Paradigm Tribe glares at Chaotic. They might murder him~
Jock Reasoning: Paradigm Tribe, I’ve got nothing for you. I’ll see you all tonight at tribal council.
~Sad music plays as the Paradigm Tribe sulks off with Chaotic trailing far behind~
~The Paradigm Tribe sits around the fire. Chaotic is singing ‘Loser’ by Beck. He’s standing by himself. PerZag looks over~
PerZag: It’s got to be him
Chad Vargas: I’ve got no fucking problem with that
Lurrr: Yea, guy’s a moron.
Mario Maurako: Alright then, easy breezy…we’ll all vote Chaotic.
~The afternoon wanes. Carrington is shown sitting off to himself. Vargas and Lurrr are watching his behavior~
Lurrr: Who is that guy, anyway?
Chad Vargas: Some fucker from another promotion
Lurrr: He run around with any of the guys over on the Savage Tribe?
Chad Vargas: Yup
Lurrr: Fuck…I don’t trust any of that shit.
~Lurrr approaches Maurako later~
Lurrr: Hear me out…what IF we vote Carrington instead of Chaotic
Mario Maurako: You serious? Why?
Lurrr: He might have alliances on the other tribe…I know for a FACT he’s worked with some of those douche bags over there.
Mario Maurako: Even if that’s the case, we can get rid of him later
Lurrr: Maybe…maybe not…I know Chaotic is fucking stupid…but at least he’s just one guy.
~Maurako thinks. We cut to a confessional~
Mario Maurako: I thought at least THIS vote would be easy…but now we’re talking about Carrington…uggghhhh
~Mario runs his fingers through his hair. Vargas heads up to PerZag~
Chad Vargas: Yo, Zag…looks like it might be Carrington
PerZag: Are you kidding me?
Chad Vargas: Nah man, but don’t worry…we’ll get rid of that piece of shit mask wearing freak soon enough. This is more for strategy
~PerZag is not happy. He tosses a stick he was handling into the dirt. We cut to a later scene. Zag is walking through the jungle with Josie~
Josie Barnes: I can’t help feeling nervous. This tribal council stuff is kind of scary.
PerZag: Relax. It’s going to be fine.
Josie Barnes: Yea, I know. We’ll vote Chaotic off, thank goodness. Now if we can get rid of TLS next…
PerZag: Yea, about that…looks like it might be Carrington
Josie Barnes: What?!
~We cut to Barnes storming past TLS. TLS is standing naked in the doorway of his hut. His lower half is blurred out. His face paint looks great. Josie looks at him and rolls her eyes~
Josie Barnes: GROSS. I have to deal with YOU and Chaotic for another few days? My life sucks.
~She continues storming off. TLS looks confused. We cut to TLS talking with Vargas~
TLS: Hey…I don’t know what’s going on…but I may have heard that we’re NOT voting for Chaotic.
Chad Vargas: My bad man, I was gonna tell ya. But, yea, looks like Carrington. Who told you?
TLS: Josie Barnes
Chad Vargas: Josie fucking Barnes? How the FUCK did she know?
TLS: She didn’t say…but I did see…
~We cut to an irate Vargas ranting and raving to Lurrr and Maurako~
Chad Vargas: We’ve got a mother fucking leak. That fucking stupid ass bitch Josie fucking Barnes knew about our Carrington plans. And you know she just can’t wait until the merge so she can continue sucking that cock bag CJ O’Donnell off...
Mario Maurako: Easy, Chad…you’re gonna have a stroke.
Chad Vargas: I’d like to give someone The Stroke right about now…FUCK
Mario Maurako: Lurrr?
~The Godfather’s theme begins to play~
Lurrr: We can’t have people in our tribe that are untrusthWorthy.
Mario Maurako: It’s not personal, it’s just business…
~In the background we see Paras talking with Barnes, giving her a pat on the shoulder~
~We cut to tribal council. The ten members are all seated with a happy Jock Reasoning~
Jock Reasoning: You all might be wondering why I’m in such a good mood
~Silence~
Jock Reasoning: I sold all of your phones on Craigs List and made a very nice profit
Chad Vargas: Nobody cares you wanna be disc jockey
Jock Reasoning: I hate you
~Jock composes and moves forward. He starts with questions~
Jock Reasoning: Tough challenge today. Chaotic…would you like to maybe expound or, at the very least, explain the reasoning behind your apparent sabotage? Did it have something to do with the pride and heritage that comes with wearing a mask…the mystique and history that is embodied with each and every lucha mask? Was it simply TOO emotional for you to remove?
Chaotic: Nah. I just didn’t fucking want to
~Lurrr tries to kick Chaotic, but PerZag stops him~
Jock Reasoning: Alright then. Lurrr, you seem pretty angry…is it safe to assume that Chaotic is the target tonight?
Lurrr: I’d say so. It’s pretty simple…you’ve got to win these challenges otherwise you’re fucked at the merge.
Jock Reasoning: Bradley…you’re new…people don’t know much about you…you’ve been pretty quiet thus far…a mystery, if you will. Do you think that might put a target on your back?
Bradley Carrington: It could. But I’d hope they’d give me a chance. Just because I’m new doesn’t mean I can’t be trusted. I don’t care who’s on that other tribe, this is an individual game and I signed up to win.
~TLS looks at Brooks and says “good answer.” Brooks nods~
Jock Reasoning: Lurrr...in years past, under previous management you were seen as the chosen one. A man with the golden ticket…a lot of people attributed your success to the fact that you and Dean were best friends. Sitting amongst a few hall of famers and several vets…do you think that puts a target on your back?
Lurrr: Are you kidding me? This shit again? No, I don’t think so. This is Survivor this isn’t Sinful fucking Nature or FrostBite…what happened in the ring is irrelevant. Plus, Dean no longer runs OCW anymore…this is all Buffet
Josie Barnes: You do seem pretty tight with Buffet
Lurrr: And WHO the fuck are you?
Josie Barnes: I meant no disrespect, I’m just saying
Chaotic: I’m with you, Lurrr!
~Chaotic extends his fist for a bump. Lurrr leaves him hanging~
Lurrr: Don’t fucking touch me
Jock Reasoning: Hidden Immunity Idol…we all know it’s out there. Odds are, someone has already found it…Mario, you seem to be pretty knowledgeable about this game…does the hidden immunity idol concern you?
Mario Maurako: Absolutely…I think we’ve all looked for it at times. It’s a huge weapon.
Paul Paras: He’s right. A weapon that, if concealed can do tremendous damage.
~A few members look at Paras~
Jock Reasoning: What if people KNOW you have that idol…
Chad Vargas: Big fucking threat, especially if the person holding it can’t be trusted.
Jock Reasoning: Chad, it sounds like you’re unhappy about something
Chad Vargas: It’s not that I’m unhappy, Jock. It’s that I don’t fuck around. You give me your word, you stick by it. You start flirting with other douche bags, then we have issues.
Jock Reasoning: Has someone on this tribe been flirting with others…showing a lack of loyalty?
Chad Vargas: Fuck YES they have and I hope we can do something about it…TONIGHT.
~Mario breathes in heavily, obviously anxious. Everyone grows quiet. Jock doesn’t have anything left to say~
Jock Reasoning: Well, alright then…on that note, it is time to vote.
~Dramatic music plays as they begin to head to the voting area. Chad stuffs his vote. Maurako stuffs his. Brooks displays great penWOmanship and writes Chaotic’s name down with a heart in the upper left corner~
Julliet Brooks: Sorry. You seem quite young and a little over eager but we really need to win challenges. Best of luck to you, seriously.
~Brooks stuffs her vote. Paras stuffs his. Lurrr stuffs his. Carrington stuffs his. Chaotic grabs the marker and slovenly writes something that resembles LURRR~
Chaotic: This is for trying to kick me at tribal council. No other reason.
~He stuffs his vote. PerZag stuffs his. TLS stuffs his vote. The final member, Barnes approaches. She writes CARRINGTON down~
Josie Barnes: You seem nice and I’d like to get to know you outside the game. But, for now, this has to be done. I’m sorry.
~She stuffs the tenth and final vote and heads toward the seated area. Nerves consume all the participants. Jock retrieves the basket and heads to his place in front of them. He pauses and looks over the competitors~
Jock Reasoning; Alright…if anybody has a hidden immunity idol and would like to play it…now would be the time to do so.
~We scan the various tribe members. Mario wipes some sweat from his forehead. Lurrr scratches his neck. Paras stares at the ground. Chaotic squashes a bug with his foot. Carrington clutches his bag. PerZag reaches for his bag and grabs the zipper…the music rises…the tension builds…he lets go of the zipper and looks at Jock~
Jock Reasoning: Well, alright then…once the votes are read the decision is final and the person voted out will be asked to leave the tribal council area immediately. I’ll read the votes…
First vote…Chaotic
Chaotic: FUCK YOU ALL
Second vote…Bradley Carrington
~Jock pauses with half the votes read~
Jock Reasoning: That’s two votes Carrington, one vote Lurrr, one vote Chaotic, and one vote Chad Vargas. I’ll continue…
Sixth Vote…PerZag
~A look of confusion crosses PerZag’s face~
Seventh Vote…PerZag
Jock Reasoning: That’s three votes PerZag, two votes Carrington, one vote Lurrr, one vote Chaotic and one vote Vargas.
Ninth vote and the second person voted out of OCW Suvivor…PERZAG
~PerZag stands up. Barnes looks toward him with confusion and a hint of sadness. He grabs his torch and places it in front of Jock~
Jock Reasoning: PerZag, the tribe has spoken.
PerZag: Fuck you all
~PerZag exits the voting area. Carrington looks pleasantly surprised. Chaotic is, well, being Chaotic. His mask hides his features. Barnes shakes her head and stares at the ground~
Jock Reasoning: Second vote in the game and it appears as though we have our first blindside. You guys can head back to your camp, I’ll see you in a few days.
~The Paradigm tribe members stand and exit~
NEXT TIME ON OCW SURVIVOR: The Savage Tribe realizes there was no liquor in their wine…they were fooled into thinking they were drunk. Annie’s booty shorts get shorter. MJ Bell develops a craving for GRUB WORMS. CJ lets someone else touch the idol. TIO revisits the moment when his mere presence scared Chaotic into submission at their latest challenge. Meyhu catches TWO fish. Morbidus receives some bad news when his application to join the red cross has been denied. Rebel does something rebellious. Josie Barnes feels like an outcast. Julliet Brooks promises to never eat cooked crab again. TLS continues inviting people to his hut. Bradley Carrington realizes he needs to make a move. Chad Vargas curses PerZag. Paul Paras looks to unify a slightly fractured tribe by telling them stories of how Perfectly Marvelous’ unity brought them much success. Maurako feels stress from the game. Lurrr and Chaotic have it out. And, Pryde gives the eulogy for Chess’ funeral. Curt Canon weeps…join us next week for OCW Survivor!
~The votes are shown. We see Vargas holding “PerZag”. He gives his reason~
Chad Vargas: If I can't trust you - I can't trust you. Bros before joes (josie) I'm sorry champ.
~The rest of the votes are shown. We then see PerZag, post vote~
PerZag: Fucking stupid. I had that damn hidden immunity idol and didn’t play it. Fucking STUPID. They keep Chaotic? FUCKING STUPID. They are going to lose all the challenges. The Paradigm Tribe is NOT Worthy. Josie, good luck. Everyone else, fuck off.
~We fade out~
Third Vote…Lurrr
Fourth Vote…Chad Vargas
Fifth Vote…Bradley Carrington
Eighth Vote…PerZag