LIVE! Monday, August 25th from The Conte Forum in Newton, Massachusetts
Smith: Hello again everyone and welcome to another edition of Monday Night Massacre as we are only SIX days away from Last Man Standing!
Hood: Shit, that's it?
Smith: Indeed it is, Hood...and we get to spend the entire week in Massachusetts!
Hood: Ugh, terrible scheduling by OCW's front office yet again
Smith: Tonight we have a special preview of Last Man Standing with a tournament to determine a number one contender for Legion's Internet Title...they will then receive their shot after winning the tournament...mimicking how it's all gonna go down on Sunday.
Hood: Someone is going to be exhausted and it's probably going to be me
Smith: Not to mention an potentially epic Tag Team Title match featuring two CWF teams and much, much more...
“Everybody Wants You” by Billy Squier blasts over the P.A. system as President Treat Cassidy makes his way down the aisle waving to the crowd, most cheer but a few boo the president. Cassidy is flanked at both sides with Vice President Shane Anderson and Head of Security Mack Hollywood. Cassidy reaches the ring and climbs up using the steel stairs. He summons a microphone from Belvedere, he raises it to his lips and begins to speak.
Treat Cassidy: Welcome to Monday night Massacre ladies and gentlemen! The people of Massachusetts have been nothing but kind to us over the course of the week….
The crowd erupts into cheers at the mention of their home state.
Treat Cassidy: If only the Red Sox and the Patriots will do something other than choke this season, maybe y’all will be happier!
The crowd boos a bit as Cassidy snickers, exchanging fist bumps from Anderson and Hollywood.
Treat Cassidy: Until then, OCW is in town baby! We’ve got a star studded show set up for y’all tonight, highlighted with an Internet championship main-event where new champion Legion will defend his title against one of the lucky winners this evening. Will it be “The Fire Goddess” Serephina? Will it be Caution? Richard? Raychel Manhoe? Don’t know it could be any one of them and that’s the beauty of tonight! Quite frankly, I always love seeing a title change hands, but I would be lying if I didn’t say I wanted the Internet championship to stay with Legion and the OCW!
Crowd picks up a chant… OCDUB… OCDUB… OCDUB…
Treat Cassidy: Abso’freaken’luty! So Legion, Black Crusade, if you’re listening – don’t let me down! Don’t let me down like “The Street Dog” Levi Russow and Jason Xavier has let us and their “teammates” down this past week by quitting. I don’t give a crap if their busy. I don’t give a crap if wrestling night after night is taking a toll on their bodies. MAN UP and SHOW UP. Dean and myself are the busiest men in the OCW and I am here and behind the scenes night after night putting on the best shows I possibly can. If I can freaken do it then any one of y’all can, so quit your belly aching and do your jobs!
Treat Cassidy flips the microphone to his right hand man, Shane Anderson as Mack Hollywood pulls the butt of his .9mm out of his waistband as a warning to anyone who doesn’t show up for work from this point forward.
Shane Anderson: Hello OCWites! As Mr. Cassidy said, we have a great show on the books for y’all this evening! I am also personally very excited for Last Man Standing next Sunday. Where we will crown a brand new OCW World Heavyweight champion. I know none of y’all will let us down. This will be the pay-per-view that tops all other OCW pay-per-views. I’----
???: Oh would you please shut the fuck up!
All eyes turn up to the entrance ramp, where Danny B casually walks through the curtain. The crowd explodes in jeers for the CWF president, he smiles and bows for his ‘adoring fans’.
Danny: I mean, who the fuck are you? You’ve been here for what, five seconds, basically came in because the person that was actually running this company, Jack Kenny, quit and Treat here needed someone to actually do his job for him? Well, you haven’t done a very good job now have you? I mean fuck man, now that Dean’s back on the team you are pretty much expendable anyway aren’t ya?
Hollywood cocks his pistol as a warning to Danny B, but the OCW team were so busy paying attention to Danny B up on the ramp, they didn’t see two huge men make their way through the crowd and into the ring. Before Mack can do anything, the big white guy has wrestled the weapon away from Mack, and soon pins him down on the floor. The African guy holds Treat’s arms behind his back, allowing for a wonderful view of the situation.
Danny: Hell of a security guy you have Treat, foiled by one man coming up behind him. Great work there. You know I was thinking that there is just too many people in power around here…
Anderson looks to make a quick getaway from the ring, but all that causes is Danny to take on a burst of speed and catches up with the VP, throwing him back into the ring. Danny follows in, stalking the Vice President. As soon as he comes to his feet, Danny strikes, levelling the faceless executive with an RKS. With no breath wasted, Danny picks him up by the hair, dragging him into the corner and turning him around. With surprising ease, Danny places Anderson onto the top turnbuckle, facing the outside. The Ripper hops through the ropes, climbing up the turnbuckle on the outside, grabbing the lolling head of Anderson, pulling it in and hooking the arms. With a sickening smile Danny falls backwards, pulling Anderson down with a sickening ‘Ravenheart’ DDT.
Danny rolls through, but Anderson doesn’t move. He lays motionless on the floor. The big guys in the ring release Treat and dismantle Mack’s weapon before dumping it back on top of him, and together the two of them leave the ring.
Danny: Now, I think that evens the odds a little, now, if you will excuse me, being in front of an OCW audience is upsetting me slightly, I’m going to go and find my office, and I will see you later.
With that the president and his goons walk up the ramp and out of sight as medical personnel see to Anderson. As they do, we cut backstage where Angelica and Amber ‘Distorted Angel’ Ryan are in a locker room. Amber paces up and down, almaot wearing a hole in the carpet as Angelica sits with her head in her hands. The two speak in raised voices.
Angelica: “I am sorry Amber, you are more than entitled to your opinion but in this case you are wrong.”
Amber : “Wrong? How can I possibly be wrong- clearly you aren't listening”
Angelica: “I am listening...”
Amber: “No you’re not, if you think for one second Dan is more dangerous than Chris then you've taken one too many hits to the head."
Angelica stands up from the bench.
Angelica: “You know what, fine, there is only one way to settle this.”
Amber: “A bet?”
Angelica extends her hand out to Amber who meets it half way with her hand, the two shake firmly.
Angelica: “I bet you £1,000...”
Amber: “£1,000! Your monopoly money is no good to me!"
Neither woman lets go of their grip on the other.
Amber: “And when I win after taking your money...”
Angelica: “If you win...”
Amber: "When I win... I'm so confident that I'll even throw in a special stipulation”
Angelica: “What kind of stipulation... It's not-"
Amber: "I'm gonna enjoy winning way too much"
Angelica: "If you win, which I doubt you will"
We cut back to ringside for the start of our first match

Levi Russow (0-1) vs. Raychel Manhoe (0-0) vs. Tim Findlay (0-2) vs. Caution (5-4)
Belvedere: Ladies and gentlemen, this next match is scheduled for one fall and is a first round match in the massacre last man standing tournament.
Levi Russow waits in the ring for his opponents, as he looks up at the entrance ramp, he is jumped from behind by the two huge goons seen accompanying Danny B earlier in the evening. The big white guy floors him with a clothesline to the back of the neck, and his African accomplice drives a boot right into the back of his head. The first guy picks up Levi, allowing the second to deliver a huge big boot. The white guy again picks up Russow, slamming him into the mat with a sit out powerbomb. The black guy then pushes him over, perching over the fallen street dog and locking in a Camel Clutch. Russow taps but to no avail, he is held in the move until he passes out. After the hold is broken, he is shoved from the ring, and as the goons leave, they pick up his lifeless form and carry him from the ring.
Hood: What the fuck what that about? Those CWF wankers think they can come in here and just take over this match? Take out one of our stars?
Smith: That is the second time tonight already that Danny B and his CWF crew have made themselves heard, and I get the feeling it won’t be the last time either. Well, regardless of that unfortunate situation, we still have a match to have, hopefully the remaining three competitors haven’t been attacked somewhere and will be able to come out here.
Hood: We have to do something about those assholes, I hope Treat has something in store for him.
Smith: Well, for now we have to cut to a break while we sort this situation out. Stay with us.
A promo for Last Man Standing is show, after which we return to the ring which is now occupied by Tim Findlay.
Belvedere: Ladies and gentlemen, this opening round match will now be a triple threat match, introducing first, already in the ring, TIM FINDLAY!
“Fancy” by Iggy Azaela hits as one of OCW’s newest signings makes her way out from the curtain. The exuberant Raychel Manhoe jumps out from the back and struts down to the ring, making sure all eyes are on her.
Belvedere: Next, from Nashville, Tennessee, RAYCHEL MANHOE!
“Hard Workin’ Man” by Brooks ‘N’ Dunn hits and the crowd explode for their favourite hard working sum’na bitch! The old worker makes his way quietly to ringside, focuses on nothing more than advancing on in the tournament.
Belvedere: And from Brooklyn, New York, weighing in at two hundred and fifty-five pounds, he is CAUTION!
Caution slides in under the bottom rope, eyeing up his opponents. Manhoe seems to be getting a lot of attention from the old timer, and as the bell rings, he casually walks up to her and cups her nether regions. With a look of shock and disgust, Raychel slaps Caution so hard across the face that he falls onto his backside. Findlay is seen bent over double in laughter at the scene that just unfolded in front of him, but quickly has to regain his composure as Manhoe turns his way, looking to make an impact. She comes flying at him, and before he can do anything about it, she’s leapt on him with a Lou Thez press, and is raining down lefts and rights on the big guy. He manages to get his arms up and push her off, but as he quickly scrambles to his feet, Caution knocks him over the top rope with a clothesline.
The hard working SOB wastes no time in trying to wrap this one up neatly, throwing a backhand at an unguarded Manhoe, she claps her hands to her face, apparently checking for a broken nose. This distraction allows Caution to get in with a boot to the midsection, pushing her into the ropes. Caution grabs the arm and sends her across the ring with a strong Irish whip, he goes to follow up with a clothesline which she ducks, before coming off the ropes with a springboard back elbow, which catches the old timer right in the jaw. The newcomer quickly goes for a pin.
1…KICKOUT!
Caution easily kicks out of the pin attempt, but she goes straight back in with a leg drop. She goes in for another cover, but before the count even begins, Findlay is back in the ring and breaking it up, lifting up Manhoe and dropping her with a quick suplex. Findlay pops up, and is ready as Caution comes at him with a straight right, Findlay manages to counter it into an arm drag. But, before he can capitalise, Manhoe is back again, and quick as a flash has grabbed the arms and delivered her version of the Full Nelson Flapjack, the ‘Drag Race’. Raychel waits for Tim to get back his feet, and as he does, pulls him into the chickenwing position. With amazing strength he hit pulls him up and hit the “ManHO” floating over and into the pin.
1…
2…
CAUTION BREAKS IT!
Smith: This has certainly been an interesting match thus far, Findlay seems to be the brunt of the attacks though.
Hood: Sorry Smith, but I’m still laughing at Caution trying to find the bollocks on Manhoe, that was fantastic.
As Manhoe gets to her feet, Caution is waiting and throws a right hand, catching her right in the throat. After ‘Punching the time Clock’, Caution pulls in Manhoe, lifting her up and dropping her with his signature Hammerdrill Jackknife. The hard-working man makes the cover.
1…
2…
3!
Belvedere: Here is your winner...CAUTION!!!!!
‘Hard working man’ hits again as Caution has his arm raised in victory. He skulks off silently after that, working hard and keeping his mind on the second round match.
Smith: Solid opener, and a great showing by the newcomer, but the hardest working man in OCW advances on tonight.
Hood: You mean CWF?
Smith: Oh yeah, well never mind, he’s providing some great entertainment tonight!
Amber Ryan and Angelica are stood in a hallway. Bob, Angelicas creepy sidekick stands with them with a worried look across his face.
Bob: “Please don’t make me do this.”
Amber Ryan: “You will fucking do what I have just...”
Angelica: “Amber please, you have to speak to Bob in a certain way. He doesn’t respond well to this tone.”
Angelica pushes Bob up against the wall and grabs him by the collar.
Angelica: “If Amber tells you to go find us some fucking kids to help us find out who is the most dangerous Danger Boy, you do it, ok?!”
Bob nods even though his face we can tell by the look on his face he is terrified. She drops her hold on him, and he quickly scuffles off.
Angelica: “Right test one. If a cat was stuck up a tree over hanging a 30ft drop, would Crazy Chris or Dangerous Dan be the one to climb up and rescue it?”
Amber Ryan: “You know my thoughts.”
Angelica walks over to a table covered by a black cloth, and unveils a toy cat stuck to a plant, on top of a chair which sits perched on the table. Amber bursts out laughing.
Amber Ryan: “What the hell is that?”
Angelica: “It’s the best I could do with the time I had!”
Bob reappears with two children following behind me.
Bob: “Kids this is the Tag Team Champion Amber Ryan and CWF Hall of Famer Angelica.”
The two excited children both pull out autograph books and hold them out towards the women. Amber takes one and throws it down to the floor. She crouches down so she is at a level height.
Amber Ryan: “You know what you have to do?”
The children nod.
Amber Ryan: “This is the Danger Boiz locker room. Now go tell them...That your cat is in danger.”
Angelica: “We will be waiting round here. Now look sad, if this doesn’t work you aren’t allowed to stay for the show.”
Amber looks shocked at Angelicas threat to the kids.
Angelica: “What we need to find out and we wanted them to look sad!”
The two women and Bob position themselves around the corner, while the two children head towards the Danger Boiz locker room. They knock on the door which suddenly flies open and Dan stands in the doorway.
Child 1: “Mr Dangerous, our cat is stuck we need your help.”
Child 2: “It’s stuck up a tree hanging over a dangerous drop and the tree is breaking and the cat will fall off and it’s too scared to move and I don’t know who else to ask.”
Dangerous Dan: “And breathe.”
Dan steps out of the locker room and follows the two children to the table. He looks slightly bemused at the get up and simply picks the cat off the plant.
Dangerous Dan: “Here you go guys.”
Child 1: “You’re my hero.”
Dangerous Dan: “You’re welcome.”
We cut back to ringside for our next match

Richard (4-13) vs. Brandon Eastman (1-1)
Eastman is already in the ring.
Belvedere: Ladies and Gentlemen, this is a first round match in tonight’s special Massacre Last Man Standing Tournament! Introducing first, already in the ring, Brandon Eastman!
”In Too Deep” by Sum 41 hits as Richard rushes to the ring.
Belvedere: And his opponent, from New Jersey…standing 5’8 and weighing in at 225lbs…Richard!!
Belvedere exits as the bell sounds.
Smith: Here we go…an unexpected singles match as Seraphina
Hood: Went bat shit crazy?
Smith: Pretty much, the story I heard was she got mad because they tried to charge her tax on a box of Little Debbies and, well, that pretty much was it for her. For some reason, she felt sales tax was illegal.
Hood: That’s not what I heard
Smith: What did you hear?
Hood: I heard someone in front of her at a stop light was distracted while the light was green and didn’t accelerate through until Green had turned into Yellow, causing Seraphina to have to rush through a yellow light. She responded by running them off the road and viciously assaulting them with a crow bar…claiming it was like a felony to do what they did.
Smith: Oh my, are they okay?
Hood: The two nuns are said to be okay
Smith: What a terrible woman
Hood: Yep, either way…she’s in jail or in Guantanamo Bay…we won’t be seeing her anymore
Smith: So sad…she was probably going to win this tournament
Hood: Can’t cure crazy, Smith
Smith: Oh, hey! Richard!
~Richard rolls Eastman up~
1!
2!
3!!!
The Bell rings as Richard has his hand raised in victory~
Belvedere: Here is your winner…RICHARD!!!!!
Smith: Wow! Fast match!
Hood: Fuck, man…if you weren’t so busy chatting my ear off about Seraphina and Little Debbies I might have been able to call that roll up.
Smith: Well excuse me for being relevant
Hood: And now I want a Fruit Roll Up…life just isn’t fair, man
Smith: That’s probably what Brandon Eastman is saying…anyway, let’s head backstage
Out at the parking lot, Amber Ryan and Angelica make their way across the near empty parking lot- pushing what looks like an old timey with a sticky back wheel, squeaking incessantly as they go along.
Amber: You may have taken the first round-
Angelica: Definitively.
Amber however ignores the comment, kicking the sticky back wheel instead.
Amber: As you can see- I have prepared our next challenge.
Motioning ahead, Angelica can only chuckle as Amber takes over the pushing of the baby carriage.
Angelica: Is this going to work?
Amber: If your 'cat up a tree' could work with Bobs involvement- this should excel.
Ahead, one of the many trucks used to cart production equipment across the country is parked up (badly) as Amber strategically places the baby carriage in its non-moving path before returning to Angelica's side.
Angelica: How did you convince them to move the truck over here?
Amber: Who said I convinced anyone?
With a sly smile and a jingle of keys in her jeans pocket, Amber leads Angelica just out of sight of the truck.
As the screen fades to black, white font appears across the screen '10 minutes later'.
Angelica and Amber still watch carefully, waiting for signs of the Danger Boiz- however it seems clear Angelica is starting to get impatient.
Angelica: They won't show...
Amber: They'll show.
Sure enough, moments later the sound of footsteps cuts their conversation off as the Danger Boiz stroll into view, clearly wary of the set up. Amber, with another sly smile mouths the words 'watch this' before clearing her throat...
Amber: Oh my baby!! Save my baby!!
The badly disguised shrill cry echoes as the Danger Boiz look at each other rather confused, discussing between themselves before Crazy Chris casually strolls over the the baby carriage and pushes it out of the way of the truck with a shrug. Meanwhile out of sight, Amber celebrates with a fist pump while Angelica shakes her head with a knowing smile.
Angelica: Okay, I'll pay that.
Amber: 1-1, only one way we're gonna settle this...
Angelica: Tie breaker?
Amber: Indeed.
We cut back to ringside for the start of our next match.

Caution (6-4) vs. Richard (5-13)
”In Too Deep” by Sum 41 begins to play as Richard rushes down to the ring. The fans are on their feet cheering the OCW underdog.
Belvedere: Ladies and Gentlemen, this match is scheduled for one fall and the winner will go on to face Legion for the OCW Internet Championship! Introducing first, from New Jersey…standing 5’8 and weighing in at 225lbs…Richard!!
”Hard Workin’ Man” by Brooks N Dunn hits the arena as former OCW Hardcore Champion, Caution hustles down to the ring.
Belvedere: And his opponent, from Brooklyn, New York…standing 6’2 and weighing in at 255lbs…Caution!!
Caution is inside the ring as Belvedere exits, with the bell sounding.
Smith: Well, here we go…Caution has to be at a disadvantage, you’d think…seeing as he’s…
Hood: Fucking old as dirt?
Smith: I was going to say Richard’s senior…but, that works, I suppose
Hood: Yea, apparently Treat and Dean want Caution to die of a heart attack before CWF gets going…only logical explanation for making a World War 2 vet wrestle more than once in one night.
Smith: Perhaps
Caution and Richard quickly lock up. Richard attempts a side head lock, Caution wiggles out of it and hooks Richard around the waist. He lifts Richard up into the air for a German Suplex…Richard works his way free as he rolls over and slides down Caution’s back. He hooks both of Caution’s legs, attempting to pull him to the mat for a pin…Caution maintains his balance and throws a punch down at Richard’s head, between his legs. Richard moves out of the way as Caution’s hand slams into the mat. Richard rushes to his feet, he runs into the ropes and bounces off with Caution’s back to him. Richard leaps into the air and he drills Caution in the back of the head with a flying forearm! Caution stumbles forward, into the ropes. Richard follows up with a knee into the back of Caution, sending the veteran through the ropes and to the floor.
Smith: Fast start for Richard, obviously the fresher of the two.
Hood: Yea, I’m probably going to quit and ingest cyanide if Richard wins this tournament.
Smith: Let’s not be over dramatic or anything
Hood: Never
Richard watches from the ring as Caution gets to his feet…he grabs the top rope and propels himself up and over with a plancha attempt…Caution moves and Richard slams into the outside floor with tremendous impact!! Caution yanks Richard to his feet, lifts him into the air and drops him, throat first, across the guard rail. Richard’s body remains propped up against the guard rail as Caution knees him into the midsection/rib cage area several times.
Smith: Caution, in his own element, has regained control of this all important contest.
Hood: Yea, throwing Caution out of the ring is like hurling a shark into the ocean.
Smith: And then jumping in there with said shark, right?
Hood: Well, I guess…but not like a Tiger Shark or Great White…maybe a Blue Shark
Smith: Hey, Blue Sharks can be dangerous
Hood: Whatever, only time those fuckers ever bite someone is when they are basically forced to…Blue Sharks aren’t dangerous…and I highly doubt their blueness
Smith: What would you call them?
Hood: I don’t know, maybe slender not-nearly-as-aggressive-as-they-look-on-tv Sharks
Smith: I think they should stick with Blue Sharks
Hood: Yea, me too
Caution pulls Richard to his feet, hurling him back into the ring under the bottom rope. Caution climbs onto the apron and makes his way to the nearest corner. Quickly, he scales the corner, reaching the top. Richard, on his feet and stumbling, turns around to face Caution who leaps off with a Double Axe Handle!! Richard falls over as Caution makes a pin attempt
1!
2!
Kick Out!!
Smith: Near fall there by Caution…
Hood: I can’t believe how far Richard has come in his OCW career. He actually kicks out of pinfall attempts now
Smith: Indeed!
Caution wails away on Richard’s face with a furious combination of lefts and rights. Richard’s legs kick around as he’s unable to escape. Caution returns to his feet and he drops a quick leg on the neck of Richard. He then drags Richard into the nearest corner, slamming Richard’s face into the bottom turnbuckle. Caution sets Richard up with the back of his head leaning against the bottom turnbuckle. Holding onto the top rope, Caution leaps into the air and comes crashing down with a Double Stomp into Richard’s face!! Caution repeats the move two more times as Richard’s body goes limp. He drags Richard into the middle of the ring in an almost arrogant fashion.
Smith: I think Caution is feeling fairly confident at the moment
Hood: No shit, he just did the ULTIMATE FACE SMASH combination
Smith: Is that what it’s called?
Hood: Absolutely, Caution was telling me about the move earlier today while his oxygen tank was being refilled.
Smith: I highly doubt that
Hood: Which part?
Smith: Every part
Caution yanks Richard to his feet…Caution holds Richard up, keeping the out-on-his-feet competitor from falling back to the mat. Caution balls up his fist and he drills Richard in the throat with Punch The Clock!! Richard lands flat on his back as Caution goes for the pin.
1!
2!
Shoulder Up!!
Smith: Nearly a three count!!
Hood: Fucking Richard…is it merely back spasms causing his arms and legs to flail wildly?
Smith: No, I think he’s actually escaping these pin attempts
Hood: Un-fucking-real
Caution returns to his feet in a bit of frustration. He pulls Richard up and whips him into the nearest corner…Richard slams hard. Caution charges in, driving a shoulder into Richard’s abdomen. Richard stumbles out as Caution kicks him in the gut and drops him with a DDT onto the mat. Caution rolls back to his feet, breathing heavily, but ready to end things.
Smith: Caution’s wind is running out, he’d better put Richard away
Hood: The old man needs his oxygen tank!!
Smith: I highly doubt OCW would employee a wrestler who needs an oxygen tank to get around
Hood: Seriously? Have you forgotten EHUD?
Smith: What do you supposed ever happened to ole Ehud?
Hood: Grimace, obviously…the purple beast finally conquered his arch nemesis
Smith: It’s a sad day when a giant, purple beast created by a fast food chain ran by a ketchup colored hair disco clown can’t be trusted.
Hood: You fucking know it
Caution rips Richard to his feet again…he kicks Richard into the gut and looks to deliver his Jacknife Powerbomb. Lifting Richard up into a powerbomb position, the once maligned wrestler fights back with punches into Caution’s head. The winded wrestler staggers around allowing Richard the opportunity to slide down his back, just like he did earlier and, this time, pull Caution over for the pin! The ref slides in for the count.
1!
2!
3!!!!
Caution kicks out milliseconds after the three…the bell rings with Richard crawling to his feet, in pain, but thrilled with victory.
Belvedere: Here is your winner…and the man who will face Legion for the Internet Championship…RICHARD!!!!!
Smith: Shocker!! Caution dominated the entire match until Richard stunned him with a pin attempt out of the jackknife.
Hood: I think Caution should petition for a reversal of this match…he didn’t have his oxygen tank, therefore, he lost.
Smith: Oxygen tanks are not sanctioned for ringside use, Hood
Hood: Why the fuck not? Some wrestlers wear masks…some wear knee braces…others have wheel chairs…why can’t Caution have an oxygen tank?
Smith: Because, a hardcore wrestler like Caution would most likely use it…wait a minute, WHEEL CHAIRS?
Hood: Yea man, you’ve never seen Legless Joe Jackson wrestle?
Smith: Oh for the love…let’s go backstage
Backstage, Amber and Angelica are beaming at what seems to be a female third party- messy blond bed hair and an old timey dress clinging to probably the ugliest female form ever conceived. Perhaps because it becomes quickly clear that it isn't actually a female but instead Angelicas 'sidekick' Bob dressed in a blond wig that won't sit straight and some kind of frilly dressed stained with sweat.
Bob: I feel ridiculous.
Angelica: You look perfect.
Amber: ... and by perfect she means ugly as sin.
Angelica elbows Amber in the ribs slightly as if to say 'not helping' but Amber just shoots her an annoyed look.
Angelica: What she means is-
Amber: What I mean is that you look like a proper lady, one needing to be rescued...
Amber covers her mouth as if to cough
Amber: *cough from themselves *cough*
Bob sighs knowing how futile resistance actually is.
Bob: What do I have to do...
Angelica: Simple really, you lay down here... We'll tie you down and you scream to be saved like a good little damsel.
Bob looks down, skeptical of the set up. Amber however, senses his hesitation.
Amber: Now would be good...
Resigning himself to the fate designed, Bob lays down on the ground and rests his head along the toy train tracks set out. Meanwhile the girls look to each other realizing another choice to be made.
Angelica: Dibs on not tying his legs
Amber curses loudly, realizing she's been beaten and quickly the girls set to work tying their 'damsel in distress' to the train tracks. Amber trying to tie a knot with her eyes firmly closed as to not see anything.
Finally finished, they step back to admire their work- looking to each other before moving out of sight.
Angelica: You can start screaming now Bob.
Bob: Help me?
Amber: Like you mean it, idiot.
Bob: Oh help me, help this poor damsel before the train comes along!
Both girls shrug as sure enough, along come the Danger Boiz chatting animatedly between themselves, probably about how strange their evening has been. Angelica watches them approach before pressing the button to send the toy train on its way, buzzing like a mosquito as it rolls along the track. As the boys approach, Bob puts on his sincerest, lady like smile but the Danger Boiz simply step past delicately making sure not to touch the false damsel.
Meanwhile the girls look to each other, with a shrug.
Angelica: Call it a draw?
Amber: My eyes hurt.
And so the ladies skulk away, leaving Bob lying on the floor as the train comes along and hit him square in the side of the head with a plastic thud.
Bob: Angelica? Amber? Hello? You can untie me now... Please?
We cut back to ringside to find Belvedere in the ring, waiting to make an announcement.
Belvedere: Ladies and gentlemen, I have just been informed that we are waiting to go live to the parking lot to CWF President Danny B, who has an important message for us.
The tron flickers, coming up with an image of the parking garage here in the arena, on top of a sixties Dodge Charger sits the president, enjoying a cigarette.
Danny: Comes as no shock to me that Treat Cassidy forgot to get me an office this week, spoilt little brat doesn’t want to admit I saved his ass. No matter though, this car is worth more than his house.
So, what is this important message I have to give to all of you? Well, it involves the upcoming Pay Per View, Last man standing. As we all know, due to the vacation of the OCW Championship, the winner of the tournament will go on to face PerZag this coming Sunday for the championship. Now, as many of you know, some CWF stars are in that mix, and have every chance of coming home with the gold.
So, I figured I’d make sure all that hard work was worth it, if a CWF star wins the OCW Championship on Sunday, they might as well bin that belt, knowing full well that when they show up on Asylum nine days later, they will automatically be rewarded with the CWF World Heavyweight Championship, so fight that little harder boys and girls, your future is on the line.
Danny drags down on the cigarette again, contemplating his next thought.
Danny: Of course, there are a number of other championships in this company, and I don’t want the holders of those belts to feel like they are being left out. We already know that the OCW Tag Team Championships will be coming our way, and no matter who wins them tonight, you will be rewarded when the time comes. As for the other belts, if the Hardcore championship comes to us, then you will receive a special prize, and as for the TransAtlantic and Internet Championships, if one of those belts comes to the blue and black, then that person will become the first Impact Champion, provided the current champion Elijah lays no claim to the belt, which is looking unlikely, and if both titles come home, on the second Asylum broadcast, the two former OCW champions will duke it out for the Impact Championship.
I have to do this, because I don’t want those tainted, cursed, piece of shit championships coming to my brand, we do things right in CWF, we do it our way. So fight for your future CWF stars, because real gold awaits you. Fear the Reaper, and welcome the revolution!
The camera feed cuts, going back to Hood and Smith at ringside.
Smith: Certainly a strong proclamation from Danny B there.
Hood: The asshole strikes again, laying waste to the championships that mean everything to this company, well good, frankly, anyone that would be willing to throw our titles down the drain can fuck off to his brand and get buried there instead.
Smith: Well, he may already be able to lay claim to the Tag Team Championships, but I have faith in our guys that the rest of the championships will stay with OCW, let’s just see how smug he is then.
Hood: Last Man Standing is going to be an important night, Smith...perhaps the most important night ever
Smith: It could be the most important night in OCW history
Hood: no, EVER
Smith: Like forEVER, EVER?
Hood: Yes, as in more profound than any Biblical story or Simpsons episode
Smith: Pretty freakin huge, man
Hood: You bet your dick
Smith: Speaking of...you know whats...the Tag Team Title match is up next where *gag* a CWF tag team will lay claim to our coveted, treasured championships
Hood: Eh, Tag Titles are like those participation ribbons the fat kids 'earn' at field day...they are nice to look at and shit, but they don't really mean anything.
Smith: Indeed! Let's head down to ringside!

Amber Ryan & Angelica (c) (0-0) vs. The Danger Boiz (3-1)
Belvedere: Ladies and gentlemen, this next mat…
“Dragon Rider” by TSFH hits round the arena to a chorus of boo’s as CWF President “The Ripper” Danny B steps out from behind the curtain, Danny smiles round at the crowd as he brings a microphone to his lips.
Danny: No, no, no. Thanks for the offer there, but I think this match needs a real touch, after all, the participants are CWF’s finest, and because of that we need to something about the lacklustre team calling it.
Confusion strikes the crowd for a moment before “Tribal War” starts to play, out from the back step the two huge men seen earlier in the night. They flank Ripper as the three of them make their way down to ringside. Danny decides to make the introductions as he walks.
Danny: So let me get some introductions out of the way, welcome first the two new additions to the CWF roster, on my left is the big guy from St. Petersburg, Russia, KALBORG! And to my right is the Madagascan Mauler, TANALA! Now, with that all said and done, please, will you two dumb fucks get the fuck out of here?
Danny is looking directly at the commentary table as he speaks, eliciting shocked responses from Hood & Smith, who to their credit, stay sat put and don’t move. Tanala and Kalborg stand in front of the table, looking down at the two. The sight of the big men seems to do the trick, and both men get up from their seats.
Danny: Good, now, get the fuck out of here, and in fact, take Belvedere and that idiot timekeeper with you, oh and Scruff, go lick a window, you’re not wanted either!
With the aid of a few flexed muscles and threatening stares, the OCW team move on out, leaving only Danny B and his lackeys at ringside.
Danny: Right, now that’s settled, please welcome you team for this match, the far superior team. Your commentators, Chris Jacobs and Karen Handler, you know, people with two names. With them we bring down the best ring announcer in the world, Harold Woods, your timekeeper for this match Johnny Andrews and your special guest referee Lily Lockheart!
Ozzy’s “Crazy Train” hits and the CWF staff make their way down to ringside to tremendous jeering. Seemingly unfazed they fall into their positions around ringside.
Woods: Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, children of all ages, welcome to the premier match on this subpar show. I am Harold Woods, your brilliant ring announcer, and I am here to introduce you to the premier stars of CWF here in this match, so, this match is scheduled for one fall and it is for the OCW Tag Team Championship!
First, from Smithsville, Tennessee, weighing in at a combined weight of four hundred and thirty eight pounds, Crazy Chris and the OCW Hardcore Champion Dangerous Dan, the Danger Boiz!
“Don’t stop the demons” hits as the challengers burst from the curtain, filled with energy, raring to take their chance to finally claim the tag team championship. The crowd give a mixed reaction for the usually popular superstars, but this lukewarm reception doesn’t little to fade their will to get into the ring and start this fight.
CJ:Well, we are off to a great start here at CWF’s premier match, for those that don’t already know, I’m Chris Jacobs, sitting alongside Karen Handler and what a match we have for you loyal CWF’ers here tonight!
KH: If only it were CWF’ers Chris, what we have here is the usual slack jawed redneck assholes that populate the OCW audience, luckily, we won’t have to deal with them long!
CJ: A proper lady as always Karen, but let’s look at the match here, The Danger Boiz are looking excited for their first match under a CWF banner in years, they are former CWF tag team champions and are obviously looking forward to bringing these less than favourable titles back to the blue brand.
KH: Lucky thing is that no matter what happens here, the titles are coming back with us and we can show these sister fuckers what a real wrestling promotion does.
CJ: I thought Canadians were supposed to be friendly?
KH: And men are supposed to be intelligent, your point?
Chris opts not to answer as the music dies down and Woods clears his throat for the next introduction.
Woods: Introducing next, from Dallas, Texas, she is one half of the OCW tag team champions, the kamikaze bitch, “The Distorted Angel” Amber Ryan!
On the outside Ripper claps heartily as “Extreme” by Valora plays out for the crowd, and for the first time in weeks, Amber steps out ready to enter the ring. Regardless of the current situation, the crowd still cheer for the woman that was cheated out of her opportunity at the world championship. She stands atop the ramp, holding still, stroking the tag team championship belt on her shoulder, she suddenly looks round, seemingly wondering why she’s on her own. She twists side to side, visibly mouthing ‘where the fuck are you?’ She turns right around, vanishing straight back through the curtain. The music dies down, and the crowd show more confusion at the shenanigans in place.
A minute later “Conversations via radio” by Blue October hits and Amber bursts out the curtain again, looking rather pleased with herself, after her flies out a face familiar to all, in fact so much so, she looked like she could be the twin sister of the Tag Team Champion. Amber hands her one of the championship belts, and the two wait atop the ramp, arms crossed, waiting for the introduction.
Woods: Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome Amber Ryan’s tag team partner for this evening, from York, England, she is the only female CWF World Champion in history, and a CWF Hall of Famer, ANGELICA!
CJ: Holy Michael Weston! ANGELICA IS AMBER’S TAG TEAM PARTNER!
KH: I fucking know right? This is insane, the greatest female superstar in CWF history is back, and she is here in this shithole of a wrestling company to back up her former colleague in a major match. She might have lost Ripper, but this bitch has gone one better!
Karen receives a loathing scowl from Danny B, who is still within earshot, but she doesn’t notice, she like everyone else in the building had her eyes up on the stage, looking up at the Team of Amber Ryan and Angelica. With a cracking smile, Angelica starts to bounce down to the ring, and even Amber looks to be in an unusually good mood as she falls in behind, watching as the crowd pour out their love for the former champion. As both women enter the ring, before they have even taken off the gold from their shoulders the crowd has broken into a “this is awesome” chant.
KH: Damn fucking right this is awesome, what a match, four of CWF’s finest in that ring at the same time, it just doesn’t get any better than this. Two hall of famers and the most recognised team on this side of the Atlantic, what a damn match!
In the ring, Lily finally gives the signal to Johnny Andrews on the outside to start the match, but as Johnny goes to ring the bell, Danny holds his arm, deciding he has one last thing to say.
Danny: You know, seeing as we have this match now, let us show what a CWF match is all about, boys, could you bring out the toys?
Suddenly the lights in the arena turn out. “Ave Vampire” hits the arena, sending a creepy chill around the crowd. A small spotlight appears on stage, revealing a hooded figure just standing there. A second light, a second robed figure stood alongside the first, and then a third. These figures move down the ramp, leaving quite a distance between them, before they all line up again at the bottom of the ramp. All three clap in unison, returning their lights to their normal state, and causing an uproar of excitement from the fans. Each of the three stood in front of a casket.
Danny: Ladies and gentlemen, this next match is now a casket match, the only way to win is to place both of your opponents into a casket. Also, due to the 24/7 rule of the Hardcore Championship, if the team of Angelica and Amber Ryan win this match, whoever places Dangerous Dan into a casket will become the new OCW Hardcore Champion.
The crowd becomes unbearably ruckus as the opening bell finally rings, nobody in the ring moves, all four of them too busy looking at the three open caskets now placed at the bottom of the ramp. It comes as no shock that Crazy Chris is the first to make a move, charging at Amber Ryan with a takedown attempt, which she has enough wherewithal to turn into an armdrag counter. Chris shoots over Amber, landing hard on the mat a foot away from the casket, he backs up quickly, seeming to come to terms with what this match now entails.
KH: Trust Danny B to put on a match like this, and to pretend it wasn’t planned all along! Still, it going to be fucking epic, a casket match of all things, once again Danny B hits a first here in OCW. Of course, when you have a cookie cutter company that hasn’t broken the mould in ten years that is no surprise.
CJ: I cannot disagree with that, but think about this match for a second, this type of stipulation is more psychological than physical, before you anything in this match you have to get over whatever fear you may have about the caskets themselves, and like you said, in typical Ripper fashion, there’s three of them!
Dangerous Dan charges in next, locking up with Amber in a collar and elbow, the much stronger Dan gets the advantage, pushing Angel back, but unable to take her off her feet, he finds himself on the receiving end of a straight right hand from Amber. Chris tries to come up behind with a sneak attack, but gets taken off his feet after a clothesline from Angelica, who looks rather pleased with herself. The girls take one look at one another, before taking off and going after one of the brothers each, Amber goes for Dan, Jelly sets her sights on Chris.
Dan is still down on the floor after the punch from Amber, she stomps a couple of boots down on his midsection before opting to place herself on the second rope, she comes off with a fist drop aimed right at her opponents head, but finds herself punching the mat as Dan rolls out the way. As she recovers from the missed move Dan sets up “The ENDD is near”, but she ducks the superkick and is able to place a boot in the small of Dan’s back, sending him reeling forwards. Wasting no time at all, Amber dives at Dan with a clothesline, taking the both of them over the top and crashing to the floor.
CJ: What a sequence there from Amber and Dan, neither really getting the advantage over the other.
KH: Amber has a lot to prove here tonight, she said it herself, people have been claiming that Danny B carried the team while they were champions, now she wants to prove that she can do it on her own, or you know, with another CWF Hall of Fame bitch backing her up!
CJ: That’s all well and good, but this is no longer a normal match, none of these guys were prepared for such a match, and no one ever comes out the same from one.
Back in the ring Angelica has managed to back Chris into a corner, she comes at him like a crazed bitch with forearm strikes. Chris is caught completely off guard, and is unable to guard effectively. She then goes for the kill shot, trying to dump Chris over the top and into one of the caskets. He hangs on the best he can to the top rope, managing to land on the apron and getting in a shot to Angelica’s face. It catches her by surprise, allowing Chris to quickly jump back into the ring. He levels her with a flying clothesline, sending the hall of famer crashing hard onto the back of her head. Chris takes a chance, springing off the middle rope and rotating through the air, coming down on Angelica with a moonsault. Chris springs up, adrenaline pumping, trying to figure out his next move. He starts trying to drag Angelica towards the caskets. She takes advantage of the time, striking upwards, catching Chris under the jaw.
CJ: Another great back on forth in this match, no one seems to have the upper hand here yet, this may be an uphill climb for the Danger Boiz, but if the boys can reunite in the ring, they would have the upper hand, but the girls are doing a good job at keeping them separated.
KH: You think these bitches have any chance of losing here? The Danger Boiz are good, but they have a habit of choking in big match situations, besides, last time they were in the ring with Amber Ryan, they lost!
CJ: That may be true, but Dangerous Dan is a stickler for never giving up in life, and Chris has always been looking for the recognition he deserves, and tonight he might get that very chance.
On the outside, Amber and Dan have spilled into the crowd, now as Amber tries to create some space, Dan collects a chair from a fan, and gives chase, sending Amber up the stairs trying to find an opening for an attack. Considering that she keeps managing to open the gap between them, Dan throws caution to the wind and flings the chair up the stairs. Amber ducks it, but the distraction gives enough time for Dan to charge up the stairs and spear Amber right from them and into the crowd.
The effect in the crowd spreads quickly, the original fans that were taken down as part of the move topple into others, sending a ripple through the stands. Some fans fall being taken down with flailing arms, others trip over the fallen fans as they rush in to see the carnage created. Dan crawls to his feet, looking down at the mangled form of Amber Ryan, splayed out all over the seats. With a touch of a limp, Dan makes his way back down to the ring, where his brother had lost the advantage to Angelica, and was now trying to fight his way out of a headlock.
CJ: Now that is how you take someone out of the equation, this is exactly what Dan needed, especially as Angelica is wearing out Chris in that ring, another few minutes and she would have been able to just roll him into one of those caskets.
KH: I have to give him his credit, that was quite the strategy, that, or he was just fucking lucky.
Dan jumps the barricade, and Angelica sees him coming, releasing the hold on Chris and flying over the top rope to meet Dan face to face with a cross body block. The crowd roar their approval for the veteran, and a loud and positive “You still got it!” chant comes along. Angelica takes a minute to shout back “I never lost it!” before turning her attention back into the ring and chasing down Chris, who was started to recover, dropping a running elbow drop to the back of the head. Jelly looks between the floor and the mat, choosing her moves carefully. She takes one look over at the caskets, and chose to pick Chris up by the hair and drag him towards the boxes.
Dan has recovered slightly on the outside, enough to see the situation in the ring. He climbs the steps at speed, running along the apron and cutting Angelica off at the pass, swinging an elbow, which found its mark around the temple of the legend. Angelica drops Chris as she drops backwards to the mat. Dan leaps over the top and takes a moment to check on his brother, deciding he’s fine, Dan turns back to Angelica, who is shaking the cobwebs from the elbow to the head.
CJ: Well the boys have certainly taken control of this one now, Angelica looks to be in trouble.
KH: Maybe she is, but Amber is still up in the stands, she may out for the count, but she is nowhere near the casket, that is dead weight you have to drag around.
CJ: Fair point, but if they can put Angelica to rest, there is two of them and one of her.
Dan goes after Angelica, shoving her into a corner with a flurry of strikes. She manages to defend against most, but suffers from a knee to the stomach, Dan strikes upwards with the opening, snapping her head back into the turnbuckle, coming off the move Dan catches her as she comes in, throwing her through the air with an unusual belly to belly suplex. She crashes to the mat, arching her back in pain. Dan sets up, waiting for Angelica to get to her feet. She gets up clumsily and Dan strikes, landing The ENDD Is Near on her, sending her snapping backwards and hitting the mat hard. Wasting no motion, Dan climbs the turnbuckle and floats through the air, hitting THE ENDD on the prone Angelica. With the help of the recovering Chris, Angelica is placed into the central casket and the lid is slammed shut by Dan.
CJ: Well, score on for the good guys here, Angelica is in the casket and half the job is done!
KH: Yeah, all well and good, but look up at the stands, Amber Ryan is still up there, she might be on her own now, but getting her down here is not going to be easy.
Dan takes a moment to make sure Chris is good to continue, before the two partake in a strategy meeting. They soon split up, both sliding out of the ring, Dan headed straight to the barrier going towards the position Amber lay. Chris instead takes off up the ramp, disappearing through the curtain. Dan slowly climbs the stairs, looking to avoid an ambush. He manages to get to where Amber was resting, and finds her in the exact position he left her. Dan reaches down, picking her up by her crimson locks, trying to rouse her enough to get her to move down the stairs. Succeeding, he starts making his way down the stairs, holding her round the neck. In typical fashion, Amber shoves him off, barely able to stand, she stares down her opponent. So much so that she doesn’t see Chris appear behind her. The masked lunatic runs forwards, jumping onto the guard rail, sliding down and taking out Amber by crashing into her back. Dan catches her as she falls, avoiding having to drag the dead weight.
KH: Like we said before, once the Boiz got on the same side and were able to work together, there is nothing that Amber can do now.
CJ: She is going to have to wait for an opening now, there is no other way. They still have to get themselves back down to the casket.
Amber strikes out with a head butt, and Dan takes it on the chin, but Chris is right there waiting, wrenching Amber’s arms behind her back, Dan now picks her up by the legs, and whilst trying to navigate the stairs and the flailing hostage they were keeping, they make their way down. At the base of the stairs Amber manages to wriggle a leg free, using it to kick Dan in the face. He drops her other leg, allowing Amber to kick backwards off the floor and land a boot right to the top of Chris’ head, he drops her awkwardly, but she gets away easily enough to make her way back to the barrier and makes her way back to ringside.
The Danger Boiz quickly recover, chasing Amber back to ringside, in that time, she has made her way to the timekeepers table and stolen the ring bell. Before the boys have a chance to clock what is going on, Amber has jumped them, slamming the bell around the head of Crazy Chris, who falls to the floor, unconscious. Amber takes a swing at Dan, however, he is able to duck, and kicks out into Amber’s midsection, and in the temporary distraction is able to wrench the bell away, and strikes out at Amber, who takes the steel round the forehead and hits the floor herself, bleeding profusely from the wound. Dan takes the chance to drag the lifeless form of the distorted angel towards the empty caskets. He leans her against the frame, pondering on how best to get in her in.
Before he has a chance to decide on how to do this, the closed casket bursts open, topping over and before Dan has fully grasped the situation had been floored by an invigorated Angelica. Dan recovers quickly and turns to fly at Angelica, who moves out the way and allows Dan to crash into the casket he was planning to shove Amber into. Quickly Angelica acts and tips up the legs of Dan, dumping him into the casket and slamming down the lid, jumping up on top to hold it down as Dan pushes up trying to escape. Amber starts to show some consciousness and Angelica shouts out, trying to get the attention of Amber. The Kamikaze bitch pays no attention to Angelica, instead goes to the corner, dragging off the steel stairs from their resting place and placing them against the only remaining casket. She turns back, making her way towards Chris.
CJ: Well, no one said that you have to stay in the casket when you’re placed in there, Angelica exploiting something I think everyone overlooked in this instance.
KH: But there is still a problem here, Dan might be in the casket, but he was very much conscious when he went in, Angelica is doing the only thing she can sitting on the lid, but that leaves Amber, who is wobbly on her feet, to place Chris away for the win.
Amber tries her best to pull the lifeless form of Chris across the floor, but in her weakened state cannot summon the strength, not helped by having to wipe her face every few seconds as the bell shot had caused her to don the proverbial crimson mask. Amber sits down on the floor, catching her breath, exasperated at the situation. Amber drags herself to her feet using the apron, she leans down, throwing up the apron and taking a look underneath. A moment later she pulls out a section of replacement rope. Amber takes a moment to unwrap the tape from the rope, making it malleable enough to use. She bends over and starts wrapping the rope around Chris’ leg, showing some amazing technical skills by tying a beautiful knot in the rope. With everything she can muster she uses the rope as leverage to start shifting the dead weight of Crazy Chris.
KH: Now that is a resourceful bitch, using everything she can to pull the bigger guy around.
CJ: It’s a great move, but she is exhausted, trying to get Chris into the casket is going to be trouble.
While Amber’s actions seem heroic, it doesn’t matter as a moment later Angelica comes flying of the lid as Dan bursts from his hiding spot, wheezing heavily. The last ditch attempt escape has worked, and Dan falls out the casket trying to catch his breath. Still catching his breath Dan goes over to Angelica, shoving her into the barricade. Dan catches her on the way back, taking her by the head and ramming it into the rim off the coffin. Angelica bounces off and Dan is able to turn his attention to Amber, who he takes out with a dropkick.
Dan goes back to Angelica, and with a little heaving is able to rest her on the barricade. He then turns his attention to the casket he was in, pushing that towards Angelica. Considering the small distance between her and the wood, Dan is able to place Angelica into the silk lining and close the lid. Quickly he turns his attention to Amber Ryan, trying to come up with the best way to beat her. He opts for rolling her into the ring, which would give him the leverage. A she lays bleeding onto the canvas as he goes to the remaining caskets, moving them around so one leans horizontally against the apron. Dan rolls himself back into the ring and starts pushing Amber with his foot, rolling her lifeless form towards her final resting place. She falls in, and Dan leans over to close the lid. He slams it shut, onto Amber’s raised legs. She kicks upwards, and before Dan can do anything about it, Amber strikes out, catching Dan in the chin. He falls onto his ass, giving Amber enough time to climb out of the casket and back into the ring, albeit clumsily. She does manage to make the first move on Dan, laying him out with a straight boot to the face.
CJ: She’s come back in a big way here, it looked like it was all over for a second there.
Amber drops to one knee, trying to gain her composure. She doesn’t notice Chris climbing the turnbuckle behind her, having removed his restraints on the outside. She turns into a missile dropkick from him. She manages to move just enough to avoid taking most of the blast. She backs up against the ropes, trying to just create some space. Chris comes at her like a bull in a china shop, but she is ready, she tips him over the top and he crashes head first into the wooden rim of the casket lid, landing in a neat little package for Amber, she leans over quickly, slamming the lid down on the little brother. Amber turns back towards the ring and sees Dan making the same play as Chris, so she uses the same counter. Dan goes over the top, risking a HBK as he lands on the casket spine first. Amber climbs through the ropes, stepping onto the wood and leaping off the casket lid, aiming a leg drop at the fallen Hardcore Champion, Dan moves at the last second, sending Amber crashing onto her tail bone.
Dan kicks Amber right in the head, she lolls, out cold. Dan drags the lifeless form towards the fallen casket. As she is about to be stuffed in Amber reveals her possum play, grabbing Dan round the back of the knee, dropping him down. While she was seated she grabbed the kneeling Dan by the head, pulling him and dropping a very modified ‘Original Sin’ onto the casket lid. With one last burst, Amber pushes Dan into the upturned casket, and slams the lid shut.
Woods: Ladies and gentlemen, this match has been decided, your winners are ANGELICA and the defending Tag Team Champion and NEW HARDCORE CHAMPION, “THE DISTORTED ANGEL” AMBER RYAN!
CJ: What an incredible match, this is what CWF is all about people!
KH: We put on the best show possible, this is how we do it on our end.
Now that she had recovered enough, Amber opens the three closed caskets, revealing the still breathing bodies of Angelica and the Danger Boiz. EMT’s rush to everyone’s aid, and Danny B pop up besides Amber, handing her all three of her championship belts. He leaves her in the care of the EMT’s and slides into the ring.
Danny: Well, there you go ladies and gentlemen, the best match in OCW history just took place, and it was a CWF match. Congratultions to all four competitors here, and especially to the new Hardcore Champion. I’ll be taking that belt too guys. Now, we’re off, but if you want to see action like this, make sure to tune into the first CWF Broadcast on September 9th!
With that, all of the CWF crew, pick up and head up the ramp, triumphant with their victory, Danny stays behind to check on the competitors. We fade to commercial as Hood and Smith are seen looking down the ramp, wondering when they can take their positions back. While the confusion gets settled, we cut to a promo for Last Man Standing.
We focus back on the ringside area as the OCW personnel have all resumed their normal duties.
~“Cocky” by Kid Rock begins to play and immediately you hear a loud chorus of boos. That music usually means only one thing in the OCW and sure enough the Hall of Famer comes out from the back walking down the ramp. The boos get even louder as soon as he shows his face. Lurrr is walking down the ramp with a large smartass smirk on his face chomping down on some gum. He stops on his way down noticing a fan who is holding a sign. The sign reads “Lurrr Sucks Dick.” Lurrr locks at the sign and shakes his head know followed up with a finger pointing at the fan insinuating that they do. Of course the best part of all of this is the fan holding the sign is a female OCW fan. Lurrr rips the sign out of her hands, throws it to the ground and continues his strut to the ring. Lurrr climbs the steps slowly just eating up the heat he is receiving from the fans. He mocks the crowd reacting as if he can’t hear them. Lurrr finally enters the ring and looks at Belvedere… he shoves him out of the way ripping the mic from him~
Lurrr: Well as I stand here today in the middle of an OCW ring there are still two things in this world that haven’t changed. One being you still have to pay taxes… and the other is you guys still hate me more than ever.
~The crowd actually releases a cheer in agreement with Lurrr~
Lurrr: And I wouldn’t have it any other way because I still hate every single one of you fat, out of shape, poor, white trash excuses of human beings.
~Now some trash has started to find its way towards the ring, the usual OCW welcome for the more controversial figure the OCW has ever seen~
Lurrr: Alright enough time wasted on the garbage sitting in the stands… a lot of people were surprised when they saw OCW draft Lurrr a couple weeks back… which I don’t understand? All I am is the biggest ICON this sport has ever seen, the most revenue generating asset to the OCW, and the best damn wrestler in the business today. Back a couple months ago when titles had names like they were fucking directional no name college teams I was set up to face a young fellow named PerZag for the “Northeastern” title. As it stands today there were some regime and organizational changes at the top before Sinful Nature… these changes at the top created a few issues. The biggest issue out of all of them was the powers at be didn’t fully grasp what a full time job it is to control a charismatic guy like me. So I thought it was in everybody’s best interests including PerZag’s, that I rightfully bow out with the old regime.
~The crowd begins to chant pusssssy…pusssssy….pusssy, Lurrr smirks at the crowd~
Lurrr: Go ahead think what you may…but I can guarantee you guys one thing… there is no way in a world where all is right… that I would ever try to duck a nobody who gets confused with what’s reality and not reality named PerZag… hell bring that piece of shit out from the back now and I will let him taste the bottom of my 12.5 sized boot!!!
~The crowd starts to chant PerZag’s name hoping and praying someone will come out from the back to shut him up~
Lurrr: You may as well save your breath that guy doesn’t wanna a piece of me anymore than fucking Amber, the Danger Boiz, Grenier, or whoever else is in the back. You see even though you hate me you at least know what’s up unlike the youth in the back. I have dominated this landscape for over 15 years and there hasn’t been anyone…and I mean anyone who can touch me when it comes to the accolades I have gathered over the years. So here is how this is going to play out… since PerZag in my opinion hasn’t kept up his end of the bargain by fighting me to get to the OCW World Title… I am going to do anything and everything I can to ensure PerZag doesn’t get a sniff of any OCW gold. Last week I made sure of that and at Last Man Standing I will make sure of that. As far as Last Man Standing, Prez…. You can go ahead and have your tournament and ultimately end up with a boring, mid-card talent as your World Champion by the end of the night… but I will tell you one thing… that strap will come home where it belongs… on the left shoulder of the Hall of Famer and the ICON of the OCW!!!
~The crowd begins to chant Texas sucks, Texas sucks, Texas sucks~
Lurrr: Ahhhh yeah I love being here on the east coast with all you grease monkeys dressed up like you’re the head of the fucking Soprano family!!!
~Fuck you Lurrr, Fuck you Lurrr, Fuck you Lurrr chants ring through the arena~
Lurrr: At Last Man Standing I can tell you of two occurrences that are a certainity…. PerZag won’t win any OCW gold… and whoever comes out at the end of the night won’t have the opportunity to enjoy the OCW World Title cause it’s going to be mine sooner rather than later, that’s a promise!!!
~Lurrr flips the mic down and continues to mock the crowd as he walks up the ramp and into the back~
Smith: Strong words from OCW Hall of Famer and former 3 Time World Champion, Lurrr!
Hood: About time we got a little OCW flavor around here...it's been nothing but CWF...CWF...blech
Smith: Tell me about it, almost as bad as Dill Pickle Lays
Hood: Oh, man, have you seen the new Mocha what-the-fuck-ever coffee flavored Lays?
Smith: ...no...
Hood: Seriously man, they are out there
Smith: Disgusting
Hood: I know, right? Anyway...what's next?
Smith: It's time for our main event as Legion takes on perennial OCW underdog, Richard!
Hood: And this is what it's come to, folks...RICHARD headlining Massacre
Smith: Let's head down to ringside

Legion © (5-0) vs. Richard (6-13)
”In Too Deep” by Sum 41 begins to play as Richard rushes down to the ring. The fans are on their feet cheering the OCW underdog.
Belvedere: Ladies and Gentlemen, this match is scheduled for one fall and it is for the OCW Internet Championship!! Introducing first, from New Jersey…standing 5’8 and weighing in at 225lbs…Richard!!
The arena lights go dark and suddenly there is a pounding of a drum, akin to a beating heart as a spotlight shines down upon the OCW ntry ramp, showing where a sigil of some sort has appeared during the few seconds of darkness.
The double beat sounds once again and the light vanishes, and all is black once again. A third repetition sounds, and the spotlight is back, revealing that a black guantleted hand has torn through the metal mesh of the entry ramp. A fourth and the arena lights come back up, but in a sinister blood red as the hideous flame-hued mask of Legion appears on the jumbotron.
The monster has torn himself free of the entry ramp and raises his arms as guitars play for a moment and columns of flame light up the OCW arena, sending the lights back to their normal state. Legion walks to the ring, rolling under the bottom rope and stands, raising his left hand into the air.
Belvedere: And his opponent, From Hell…standing 6’10 and weighing in at 286lbs…he is the OCW Internet Champion…Legion!!!
Legion enters the ring, handing his title over to Belvedere. Belvedere exits the ring as the bell sounds.
Smith: Toughest task in Richard’s career, most likely…I don’t see how he can stop Legion, especially with two matches already under his belt tonight.
Hood: Yea, well, it’s fucking Richard…he’s playing with house money at this point
Smith: True…but being this close to gold…you’d think he’d not want to waste the opportunity
Hood: I’m not even sure Richard understands what titles are. I don’t even know if Richard understands what he does for a living. I think Richard just shows up and does shit.
Smith: Scary, if true
Hood: Scarier than Legion?
Smith: A different kind of scary
Richard rushes at Legion, not wishing to get behind too early in the match. He nails Legion with some lefts and rights as the big man steps back into a corner, showing no real effects from the assault. Richard climbs up to the second rope, punching away at Legion’s head…Legion shoves Richard off of him. Richard slams onto the mat, but rolls over backwards, quickly regaining his footing. He rushes back into the corner and climbs to the second rope again, slamming fists into Legion’s head. Legion, again, shoves Richard off, who hits a little harder this time…getting up a little slower. Legion waits for Richard to get to his feet…as he does, Legion rushes in for a lariat…Richard ducks and he shoves Legion into another corner. Legion slams into the corner front first, turning around and walking back towards Richard. Richard leaps into the air at Legion who grabs him, with both hands, by the throat and drops Richard onto the mat with a sitout powerbomb.
Smith: Quick exchange there as Richard did everything he could to try and establish some form of early control…to no avail.
Hood: Legion is like impossible to beat and Richard is the biggest loser in OCW history…I think we all know how this is going to go.
Smith: Never say never
Hood: Dude, it’s like watching Titanic…you know the fucking thing is going to sink…JUST GET ON WITH IT ALREADY.
Smith: Hey, I LOVED that movie
Hood: You would
Legion returns to his feet, picking Richard off the mat and hoisting him over his shoulder. Legion heads to the nearest corner and drops Richard’s face across the top turnbuckle with snake eyes!! Richard staggers towards the middle of the ring as Legion delivers a big boot into Richard’s face!! Richard is laid out in the middle of the ring, ready to be pinned…but Legion looks on inflicting more punishment.
Smith: This sadistic monster has the match won…isn’t that enough?
Hood: Do you have Alzheimers? Legion is never satisfied with simply winning a match…he wants to decimate
Smith: But…it’s Richard…
Hood: Yea, I know, this is sort of like child abuse
Legion yanks Richard to his feet and smacks him with a back hand…Richard falls back into the ropes, propels off of them and into Legion’s grasp. Legion quickly drills Richard into the mat with a Leg Sweep DDT.
Smith: Richard is out on his feet
Hood: Well, technically, he’s out on his back now
Smith: Yea, okay…you have a point there
Hood: It’s so tiring, carrying this announce team
Smith: Whatever
Legion pulls Richard back to his feet and hurls him into a corner. He drives a few vicious elbows into Richard’s head, leaving him hanging in the corner with his arms draped over the top ropes. Legion grabs Richard by the hair and he whips him into the ropes…Richard bounces off and Legion nearly takes his head off with a Clothesline From Hell!! Richard is left folded upside down on the mat as Legion methodically moves to inflict more punishment.
Smith: Legion will not be satisfied until total destruction has been achieved
Hood: Or Richard dies
Smith: Pretty much what I was inferring
Hood: Why infer when you can be fucking blunt and to the point…what are you, a woman?
Smith: No comment
Legion pulls Richard to his feet yet again and goes to hook him for a suplex…Richard, though, counters with a quick knee into the gut, followed by a small package. The ref slides in with the count!
1!
2!
KICK OUT
Smith: Whoa!! Richard almost stole the title away from Legion
Hood: Holy shit that was close
Smith: That’s how he beat Caution
Hood: No shit, Smith…it isn’t like that match didn’t take place thirty minutes ago
Smith: Sorry, just saying
Legion is quickly back to his feet…he knees Richard into the gut, who was on his feet as well…he hooks Richard for a powerbomb, lifts him up and drops him with a DDT!! Richard’s body is flattened as Legion goes for the pin.
1!
2!
3!!!
The bell rings as Legion is announced the winner
Belvedere: Here is your winner…AND STILL OCW INTERNET CHAMPION…LEGION!!!!!
Smith: Legion decided enough was enough…so he put Richard away and successfully defended his Internet Title
Hood: About fucking time…titles in OCW change hands way too often
Smith: It has been a crazy trend…however, as we said last week, Legion looks like a champion that's here to stay
Legion is making his way up the ramp, celebrating his huge title win, showing that he is still a force to be reckoned with. He makes his way through the curtain, but a second later is sent tumbling back through onto the stage. Out steps Kalborg, looking down at the internet champion with a scowl filled with absolute distain. Tanala makes his way out behind Kalborg, and behind him, wearing a huge smile and clapping loudly steps the CWF President. Danny decides to throw his two cents in again, much to the disdain of the crowd.
So, it looks like the internet title will be staying here then doesn’t it? No matter, that title is fucking cursed anyway. Good to see you Legion, good luck with your future.
The President and his goons make their way down to the ring.
So, I guess we just move forwards, and part of moving forwards is to prove that we are the superior brand in the company, and I mean, that isn’t all that hard, look at what we put on earlier tonight. OCW must be kicking itself that they’ve lose their premier stars, but you know, the better brand needs the better stars doesn’t it? Speaking of which, I’ve decided that one guy I picked in the draft I don’t want any more, so if you’re listening Jason Xavier, don’t bother showing up for work on Monday, trust me, you won’t be needed.
So I decided earlier that whosoever brings an OCW Championship to the CWF will be receiving the equivalent title on my brand. Of course tonight we have seen that the internet title will not be coming to us, and frankly I am fine with that, but this message goes out to Ashe Dawson, Jack Lockwood, Brandon Gateman and Dangerous Dan. You all have the chance to walk out of the PPV with both the TransAtlantic Title and the World Title, after all, if you win the tournament you will be the TransAtlantic Champion, and if you then beat PerZag too, well, let’s just say you will hold a lot of power in the CWF if you manage it, so put on your fighting caps boys, because it’s time to step up…
Danny is cut short as the iconic “Eye of the Tiger” hits around the arena, signifying the arrival of the number one contender, PerZag. Out from behind the curtain he steps, followed by Power & Worth associates Bob Grenier and Richard Dweck. The trio make their way to the ring, stepping in brazenly, not seeming to care about the giant men stood behind Ripper. Richard fetches a microphone for Zag, allowing him to say his piece.
PerZag: Great speech and all Danny, but I think you are forgetting something, it doesn’t matter who wins the tournament, because when they do, they have to face me, and none of them are worthy of being the champion, whereas, I am the worthiest of all.
Danny: None of them? That’s a real funny thing to say PerZag, because I would say that they are all worthy. To be honest with you, if an OCW guy makes it through because all my guys are sick that night, you may be champion, but I know that you’ll be facing a CWF guy, and I know that they are all worthy. I mean, let’s face it, you might not have been the one who pulled the trigger, but your boy Bishop was the one that orchestrated the attack on Amber Ryan at Genesis, obviously he was worried that you wouldn’t be able to get the job done. Hell he proved that by getting involved in the match, so did your goonies here, something which I haven’t forgotten by the way.
PerZag: I had nothing to do with what Bishop pulled Danny Boy, I didn’t need him. He was not worthy enough to be part of Power & Worth, he proved that when he was taken out by the likes of you at Tectonic Tuesday. If he wouldn’t have gotten involved, then I would already be champion.
Danny: Blah, blah, fucking blah Zag. Doesn’t matter anyway, your little rag tag bunch of bastards are getting smaller aren’t they? Bishop has fucked off, tail firmly between his legs, and as of next week, Richard won’t be around to help now will he, in fact, it seems like OCW won’t have a leg to stand on. You may be its champion soon, and you can let us know what it’s like to be the most special kid on the school bus.
Treat Cassidy appears at the top of the stage, catching the eye of Danny B. He stops, looking bemused at Treat. Cassidy just stares back, not flinching when Dean joins him on the stage. A smile creeps across both men as the OCW locker room spills onto the stage, standing behind Treat and Dean, backing up the smug looks of the men that run OCW. Dean is handed a microphone by Lurrr, and decides it’s time to say his piece.
Dean: Good speech and all Ripper, but what does it fucking matter, this time next week we won’t have to hear a word from you again, and good fucking riddance to ya sucka! See, you talk a lot of trash about a company that you bled for only a few weeks back, and some of my boys here, they haven’t taken too kindly to it. So, if you want to continue running your mouth go ahead, let’s see what OCW can do when…
Valora’s “Extreme” hits, and the CWF roster, led by Amber Ryan start making their way through the crowd, all coming from different entrances, making sure they leave no room for escape. They surround the ring, looking up at the stage. All eyes turn to in the ring, where Richard is looking round at all the commotion. He takes one last look at Grenier and PerZag before walking across the ring and joining Danny B.
Danny: Your roster against mine? Well, let’s just see how that goes.
Kalborg and Tanala move with speed, taking out Power & Worth, causing an all-out explosion as the separate rosters charge at one another, meeting in the middle of the ramp, clashing in a brawl like no other! In the chaos, Dean manages to make his way through the pack, and slide into the ring, and before Ripper can do anything about it, Dean lays out the Hall of Famer with a right hook. He turns in triumph, but finds himself on the receiving end of a BKO from Brandon Gateman, who is swiped out by O’Connor.
Hood: This shit has blown up here, but I don’t know if I’m seeing things, but it seems OCW is getting the advantage.
Smith: No, it looks like you are right there Hood! Come on boys and girls, we are kicking them down!
The commentators look to be right, as the smoke starts to clear the remaining stars file into the ring for the last show down. Amber Ryan, Brandon Gateman and Tim Lockwood stand on one side, with Treat Cassidy, Alice Knight, Legion, Hush and Lurrr on the other. Kalborg comes up from behind, laying out Legion with a club to the pack of the head. The war breaks out again, fists flying, bodies crashing. After another few minutes of the melee, Amber Ryan floors Lurrr with the ‘Original Sin’, and as she comes up, she looks over at whose left, Treat now looks worried, knowing that if Amber comes after him, he has no chance. But, before she can act, PerZag is up and has struck Amber over the back of the head with a steel chair. The number one contender and the Owner of OCW make their getaway, leaving behind the mess of stars laying out on the floor.
Smith: What a way to end this show ladies and gentlemen, but what a statement sent here by PerZag and OCW as a whole.
Hood: Damn fucking right, the worthy one is going all the way this Sunday, and these CWF fuckers are going down.
Smith: Well, we are looking good right now, thank you for tuning into the final weekly broadcast of Monday Night Massacre, we’ll see you Sunday for Last Man Standing, and you can watch as OCW takes home the gold!
Our show comes to an end.