LIVE! Sunday, March 15th 2015
From the Thompson Boling Arena in Knoxville, Tennessee
Treat Cassidy: Hello everyone and welcome to the official Chad Vargas Celebration!!
~The crowd goes wild with several ‘Var-gas’ chants breaking out~
Treat Cassidy: It was almost a year ago when I brought Chad into OCW. I saw a federation in need of leadership, in need of a figure head the rest of the roster could look up to and emulate. Someone who wasn’t a psycho, who didn’t hide behind a mask, who wasn’t an attention whore...nope, someone who was virtuous, a true warrior...a legend amongst legends...that man has finally ascended to the top of OCW...that man is your hometown hero, Chad Vargas!
~The crowd erupts with the loudest ovation of the evening~
Treat Cassidy: And, tonight we celebrate his ascension to the top of the OCW Mountain. So, before festivities officially get underway, I present to you a video highlighting the lifetime accomplishments of your OCW Champion, Chad Vargas.
~Treat motions for the OCWTron at the top of the stage as some hardcore epic movie soundtrack music begins to play. A shot of Chad Vargas fighting during World War II is shown as he leads a pack of soldiers, placing the flag into European soil. We then see a shot of Chad Vargas hopping around on the moon, giving The Stroke to Neil Armstrong. Our next shot is of Chad Vargas giving his famous “I have a Dream” speech...we can only assume the message was slightly different than the version we’re all familiar with. We then see Chad at woodstock, playing the electric guitar to the tune of the Star Spangled Banner with Jimi Hendrix watching in awe. Next up, Vargas is slamming a sledgehammer into the Berlin Wall, starting a chant of ‘Tear Down This Wall!’ Following that memorable image, Chad is shown explaining the internet to a bunch of MIT students and inventing Google, Yahoo, Twitter and Facebook all at the same time. Finally, we see Chad seated in a helicopter throwing Bin Laden’s body into the ocean and giving the OCW fans a thumbs up with the OCW Title strapped firmly around his waist. The video comes to an end with one final message~
~The Massacre Logo flashes on screen for the first time in awhile. We hear a crowd begin cheering as our audio is obviously piped noise from the people in attendance for this event. “Comin’ in Hot” by Hollywood Undead starts to play, reminding us all of the Massacre anthem from years past. We cut directly into a sold out Thompson Boling Arena in Knoxville, Tennessee. Our view pans through the crowd...a very PRO Vargas crowd. Several ‘Chad Vargas’ signs are shown along with a few derogatory ‘Ripper’ signs...as we focus on the ring. The Massacre theme comes to an end when we see Treat Cassidy standing in the middle of the ring flashing a huge smile~
~The lights in the arena come back on as the fans in Nashville are part laughing and part going crazy with mad props for Chad Vargas. Our cameras finally settle on Smith and Hood as Hood is wiping his eyes with a napkin where Smith shakes his head with ultimate disgust~
Smith: Hello fans and welcome to Massacre and...well...words can’t even begin to describe what we just saw.
Hood: First time I’ve ever needed tissues during, well, anything
Smith: A shameful, baseless video has driven my colleague to tears!
Hood: Huh? I’m not tearful over any of that...these are tears of awe, I had no idea Chad had done some much for this country. The man is a legend.
Smith: That was obviously a hatchet job, Hood. I mean, how in the heck would he still be alive if he were fighting in World War 2, let alone in such great shape?
Hood: Don’t ask me, this is the same place that employs Killface for fuck’s sake.
Smith: And making a mockery of Martin Luther King Jr’s famous speech...I’m absolutely sickened!
Hood: Hey, at least he waited until it was March
Smith: Incredulous, you, Treat and our champ...I can only hope Danny B puts an end to all of this and keeps Chad’s “Celebration” from taking place...no doubt it’s going to be an equal combination of offensive absurdity.
Hood: I don’t know what that means...but if it’s anything like what we just witnessed, I’m down like a clown.
Smith: Whatever...anyway, folks, if we can move past well...whatever the heck we just saw, let’s turn our attention towards the positive aspects of tonight. For starters, three intriguing matches, all containing huge Code of Silence ramifications.
Hood: Like what?
Smith: Did you even read the lineup?
Hood: Not really, I was too busy doing other cool things that don’t involve reading.
Smith: Well, Bifford will be in action tonight
Hood: YUSSS
Smith: In an open challenge match
Hood: Now I’m dialed in...is that the main event?
Smith: No...the main event features The Lockwood Party taking on Caution and Angelus Archer...if the Lockwoods win, they receive an OCW Contract and are allowed to remain in the Tag Title Match at Code of Silence.
Hood: Wrestling in an arena with a ceiling could prove costly for them.
Smith: That or they could, you know, just walk down to the ring like normal human beings. Also, Supreme Machine will take on Barbaric and if SuMa is victorious, Barbaric will be fired.
Hood: A lot on the line there.
Smith: Your sarcasm is totally unnecessary and unwarranted...folks...I believe it’s time to get started, let’s head to ringside!
The Big Bifford (3 pts) vs. TBA (0 pts)
~”Gangsta’s Paradise” by Coolio begins to play as the crowd stands on their feet and give a ‘nostalgia’ pop for OCW Hall of Fame member and former Champion, The Big Bifford. Par for the course, he rides his motorized ring to the regulation sized square circle, rolling in under the bottom rope and slowly climbing to his feet. He is handed a mic and begins speaking~
The Big Bifford: Alright, I’m out here issuing an open challenge to any wrestler *cough* Dangerous Dan *cough* in the back who has the balls to face me. So, come on anonymous *cough* Dangerous Dan *cough* wrestler. Get your ass out here!
~Bifford hurls the mic out of the ring as Scruff leans in the corner, wondering if he’s going to have to go to work. Suddenly, the lights in the arena go off. The crowd is plagued with silence. A spotlight flashes to the ceiling as a figure is standing in the rafters...it instantly drops to the ring, stopping right its feet touching the mat. The figure is Dangerous Dan...well, sort of~
Hood: It’s Dangerous Dan! He’s accepted Bifford’s challenge!
Smith: Get real, that isn’t Dangerous Dan, that’s some kind of life sized doll of Dan!
Hood: Nah man, that’s totally Dangerous Dan
Smith: You need to get your eyes checked!
~Biff lunges forward, clutching the Dangerous Dan doll by the throat. He lifts Dan up and drills him into the mat with a double handed chokeslam. Bifford then covers Dan as he looks over at Scruff. Biff yells “count!!” Scruff shrugs and falls to the mat, making the count~
1!
2!
3!!!!
Belvedere: Here is your winner...THE BIG BIFFORD!!!!!
Hood: Wow, what an impressive win, Bifford looks to be in tip top shape!
Smith: Oh please
Hood: And, with that hard fought, resounding victory, perhaps this Bifford, Dangerous Dan feud has come to its climatic conclusion.
~Bifford, with a wild look in his eyes, digs his hands into the chest of the doll and he rips it open!! Red goo starts to flow out as some fans freak out whereas others look on in curiosity~
Hood He’s ripping Dan’s guts apart!
Smith: No he’s not! That’s obviously some kind of jam or jelly...look, I think it’s strawberry jelly, you can actually see the pieces of strawberry in it.
Hood: No way man, those are human guts.
Smith: How do you know what real human guts look like?
Hood: Oh, I know, I’ve seen a ton of war films
~With Dan’s ‘blood’ all over the ring, Bifford reaches into one of the many pockets contained by his Magical Fleece and he pulls out a couple slices of wonder bread. He then slops some jelly on them and enjoys himself a nice, jelly sandwich in the middle of the ring~
Hood: Bifford is enjoying the sweet taste of victory
Smith: This is absurd, a total waste of time...let’s cut to some interesting video.
~We open up to a view of the self proclaimed future of Online Championship Wrestling dressed to impress as per usual, beard trimmed, bi-color mane tamed to a neat ponytail and tailor-made dark suit and slacks, along with a handmade silk tie and shirt with a smirk across his face~
Rhodes:”Greetings fans of OCW, I know that there are those of you who feel betrayed because you paid to see me wrestle at Massacre and realize that I am not there. You all know full well that I am well worth any price tag my man Dean slaps on a an event and then some, but trust me when I tell you this. There is no way that a man as wealthy as myself, as distinguished, as cultivated and charismatic as I am..would never, EVER be seen a shithole like Knoxville,Tennessee. I would have to drop down my IQ and net-worth about the same as my shoe size, and even that’s putting it generously. Can you imagine what it would look like? Something like this?”
~We jumpcut to a shot of someone who could possibly, maybe be Ricky Rhodes if Rhodes would ever wear a gallon size stetson, one of those horrible braided bullhead necklaces and of course beyond tacky country style shirt, pair of blue jeans and shitkicking boots. Which he’d proudly plant on the table while chewing tobacco~
Cowboy Rhodes:”Howdy ya’ll! It’s a mighty fine pleasure to be here in Knoxville tonight, the home of such proud traditions such as, bull-ridin’, bull russtlin’, bull tippin’ bull milkin’ bull pimpin’..”
~We fade out before fading back in~
Cowboy Rhodes:”..and cousins marryin’ each other and bulls..I’m mighty pleased that ya’ll took time out of yer’ busy’ schedule of ho-downin and barn’ yoddling to come and see me wrassle one of the local greats before ya’ll are all off to the waterin’ hole gittin’ drunk fightin’ and singing serenades to yer favorite pickups!~”
~We jump-cut back to the real Rhodes who shudders in sheer disgust of the very thought~
Rhodes:”Never, going to happen. However. I would like to take a moment to welcome back our fearless leader, my close personal friend. Prez Dean, What’s up sucka?! I pulled some strings and made sure they fetched some witch doctors from the jungles of Brazil and would you know, they knew a thing or two to put in that IV of yours and looks like it was worth it, bet you didn’t mind the new nurses too much am I rite brotha?! I know what a third-world shithole Brazil was and when I heard you got stuck there..I did what any loyal, and unselfish employee would do. Made sure you’d get the best out of the bad situation. Not saying that you owe me anything for it, ain’t no thing but a chicken wing man. I did what needed to be done and it got you back to where you need to be at the helm of the greatest organization in our industry. I hope you do remember who your friends are in the future, that not every 6’9 freak in a leather mask is always a safe investment when you think about the future of OCW, not naming any names either..that could be any 6’9 freak in a leather mask and busted face so in case there is a boiler room back there with TV privileges..don’t get your hunch down posture on the upright just yet.
Now as far as my upcoming match at Code Of Silence goes, The Lost Soul, painted patron saint of the downtrodden and the disadvantaged. I didn’t think someone like you would care for what happens to the inner city youths of today or who weeps for them. You did bring out a point of spraying my name in public wanting justice for me and we can agree with it because what happened to me at Revenge was a gross injustice of megalomaniacal proportions, MAGUS should have known what to do for the amount of money he got. I DESERVED that win, I was the only one in that match who was WORTH the prize to even be there, I did most of the work I left the lasting impression and if Magus had spent less time fumbling around like an amateur, I would not have to fight you for a championship which I will naturally win but if I had the Oh Shit Contract you would at least have a chance to avoid facing the future of OCW at Code Of Silence but dry up those tears buddy, you can take solace on the fact that when you do come back to your senses, the little that you have left..you will be dangling from a doc collar like the mutt you are and you have just lost to the single most modest, honest and simply the best talent money can buy in the recent history of this company. Dean himself believes I will beat you and when I got the main man in charge in my corner, not even GOD could save you from what’s to come..Enjoy the show Knoxville, it’s all downhill from this point on..”
~We fade to black with Rhodes leaning back on his chair, with a crooked smirk across his face. We cut back to ringside~
Smith: Ricky Rhodes, one of the most talented newcomers we’ve seen in quite some time appears uniquely ready for his match against The Lost Soul.
Hood: He got screwed at Revenge, he’ll totally destroy TLS at Code of Silence
Smith: I don’t see how he got screwed, if anything, he held an unfair advantage.
Hood: Smith, if you pay for lawn service, you expect your lawn to be serviced. Ricky Rhodes did not get his lawn mowed, they left a giant patch of grass un cut!
Smith: Riiiight...well, smooth transition here to Supreme Machine who is set to compete against Barbaric
Hood: Yes and if Supreme Machine wins, he will be fired
Smith: No he will not!
Hood: It says right here, “If Supreme Machine defeats Barbaric, he will be fired.”
Smith: That was poor wording by some moron at OCWHQ...probably a leftover Lockwood pretending to be an employee. It’s since been rephrased to “If Barbaric loses, he is fired.”
Hood: Ah, well fuck...that sort of takes all the suspense out of it.
Smith: You never know, Barbaric could...
Hood: ...
Smith: Yea, you’re right...down to ringside we go!
Supreme Machine (5 pts) vs. Barbaric (0 pts)
Belvedere: Ladies and Gentlemen, the following match is scheduled for one fall...
~ “Ode to Viceroy” by Mac Demarco begins to play as the crowd gives a minimal reaction upon seeing Barbaric make his way to the ring. He enters into the ring and appears ready for his match~
Belvedere: Introducing first, from Parts Unknown, standing 5’9 and weighing in at 188lbs...Barbaric!!
~“From Now on We are Enemies... You and I”
The spoken intro of “Warheart” by Children of Bodom seeps from the PA system as the Arena goes completely black. The rapidfire drumming of the song and the intro riff hits the arena like a ten ton hammer and as the growling vocals by Alexi Laiho begin, some fog begins to form on the entranceway.
“I'm an outcast on the path of rebound
Warheart! No remains from compassion or love
Slowly, a figure can be seen walking into the fog, spreading its hands into a crucifix pose as a bright light backlits it.
"I have chosen night to be my guide
Warheart! No remains from compassion or love
I'm the warheart, I'm dying to win the battle I live everyday
The shadow pulls its hands back, crossing em on its chest, causing a large pyro, which evaporates the fog, revealing The Supreme Machine standing there, his head held down and hands crossed across his chest. As the lights begin to slowly return, SuMa glares around from beneath his hair, and begins to slowly walk towards the ring. As he reaches the ring, he slowly slides in from through the ropes, gets up in the middle of the ring and whips his head up in a rapid motion, revealing his masked face.~
Belvedere: And his opponent, from The Boiler Room, standing 6’9 and weighing in at 315lbs...he is the current ‘Oh Shit’ Contract holder...Supreme Machine!!
~With both competitors in the ring, the bell sounds~
Smith: Visually, this is a striking mismatch.
Hood: Yea, it’s almost like a parent fighting a child...maybe an infant child.
Smith: I wouldn’t go so far as to say an infant child
Hood: Okay then, a toddler?
Smith: Ehhhh
Hood: Pre-Schooler?
Smith: Getting warmer
Hood: Kindergarten?
Smith: Bingo
~Barbaric walks up to SuMa and spits in his face. SuMa tilts his head, slightly to the right before slowly rotating it back forward and head butting Barbaric in the forehead! Barbaric staggers around, falling to one knee. SuMa lifts his leg up and he kicks Barbaric in the side of the face, knocking him to the ground~
Smith: Well, Barbaric showed a hint of petulance and Supreme Machine was having none of it!
Hood: I just don’t get people sometimes...they say don’t wake the bear...not only did Barbaric wake the bear, but he just spat in his fucking face. Pretty stupid
Smith: Indeed!
~Supreme Machine lifts Barbaric to his feet. He lifts a knee or two into Barbaric’s sternum, knocking the wind right out of him as the fans watch in awe at the total domination taking place in front of them~
Smith: I believe Supreme Machine can end this one whenever he wants
Hood: You think he’s going fuck around with Barbaric?
Smith: Doesn’t strike me as the type
~SuMa suddenly lifts Barbaric into the air and drills him into the mat with Apex Ultima!!! Barbaric’s body goes flat as SuMa makes the pin~
1!
2!
3!!!!
Belvedere: Here is your winner...SUPREME MACHINE!!!!!
Smith: Dominating win by Supreme Machine...and, does that mean Barbaric is fired?
Hood: It wasn’t announced...I think earlier in the week he sneezed on OCW TV and, therefore, will be allowed another opportunity.
Smith: Whatever works, I guess
~SuMa, after securing the win gets to his knees and begins to slam several fists into Barbaric’s face~
Smith: What is he doing??
Hood: Making an impression, evidently...in every way imaginable.
~After pummeling Barbaric’s swelling face, SuMa begins to grab at his hair. While doing so, he leans forward as his own, wet strands of hair hide what he’s up to~
Smith: Umm
Hood: Is he giving him a makeover?
Smith: I’d wager that’s the absolute last thing he’d be doing
~SuMa finally sits back and in his hands are clumps of Barbaric’s hair, which he ripped from the head of his defeated opponent. Barbaric is seen passed out, probably from the pain. Blood is oozing from the craters in his scalp where SuMa ripped the hair forcefully. Finally, SuMa stands to his feet, staring at the hair in his hands. Scruff, upon seeing the hair, slowly backs away before leaping through the ropes and hustling away from the ring~
Smith: Look, I know Barbaric was, well, not really much of an asset...but that is taking things entirely too far!
Hood: Pretty barbaric act
Smith: Stop
~SuMa exits the ring in silence as the crowd just stands and watches. He keeps the hair in his hands as he steps up the ramp near the entrance. Suddenly, The Lost Soul emerges from behind the curtain. SuMa stops and stares down at TLS as TLS looks at the torn hair in SuMa’s hands before looking back up at the giant currently dwarfing him~
Smith: Is it about to go down?
Hood: About to go down? Why the fuck are you talking like that?
Smith: I don’t know, felt like it fit the moment
~TLS, with his Ascension Title draped over his shoulder, looks over at the title plate and then at SuMa. SuMa turns his attention to the belt for a tense moment as the crowd rises to their feet~
Smith: Is he going to cash in?
Hood: OH SHIT
Smith: Indeed!
~SuMa turns his head forward and calmly makes an uneventful exit with TLS left standing at the top of the ramp. With SuMa gone, TLS makes his way to the ring, sliding in under the bottom rope and standing over Barbaric~
Smith: Well, we didn’t have a cash in...but, we are going to witness something else
Hood: This has not been a good night, if you’re a Barbaric fan
Smith: So, basically his mother?
Hood: Probably more like his gold fish
~TLS slowly removes the Ascension Title from his shoulder, underneath is a Dog Collar! TLS bends over and applies the collar around the neck of Barbaric~
Smith: What is he doing?
Hood: Preparing for Code of Silence, evidently
Smith: Wow, nice catch
Hood: It’s on the fucking hype sheet sitting in front of us, dipshit
Smith: I’m so ashamed and embarrassed right now
~TLS stands up and yanks on the collar, pulling Barbaric to the ropes. TLS climbs to the ropes and hops to the floor and yanks Barbaric out of the ring. His body lands carelessly to the ground, on his shoulder. TLS then walks up the ramp, dragging Barbaric, leaving a trail of sweat and blood behind him. He eventually disappears behind the curtain with the body of Barbaric~
Smith: Normally I would suggest we follow the action, but I don’t think I want to witness where they’re going.
Hood: Relax man, he’s just preparing for his match...not like he’s going to rape Barbaric or anything
Smith: I wasn’t thinking about rape!
Hood: You’re always thinking of rape.
Smith: Enough! Let’s head to a video of something that doesn’t involved rape or the body of Barbaric.
Hood: Well, shit, that narrows it down, doesn’t it?
~We cut to a promo for Code of Silence~
Everything is frail, I desolate, crush, and burn
I have chosen darkness to be my guide
War is in my heart, death is by my side
Warheart! Hate your fellow as yourself “
When the daylight strikes, I hide in my trench and die
I'm the cold-blooded killer who'll fuck you up!
Warheart! Hate your fellow as yourself
One for all and all for me I'm an animal better set me free”
OCW Presents: Code of Silence
Oh Shit Invitational
Tag Title Match
Ascension Title Match
#1 Contender for a Savage Title Match
Paradigm Title Match
Hall of Fame Title Match
#1 Contender for an OCW Title Match
OCW Title Match
LIVE! Sunday, March 29th 2015
From La Scala in Milan, Italy
**In and Out Lumberjack Match**
Angelle Laree vs. Ashe Dawson vs. El Presidente vs. Mark Storm vs. Mason Dixon vs. Noah Mackenzie vs. RM Strong vs. Simon Magus vs. Tatum Coe
**Scaffold Match**
Awe.Some vs. 'Marvelous' Mario Maurako & Lurrr
**Hangman's Horror Match**
The Lost Soul (c) vs. Ricky Rhodes
**Streets of Milan Match**
Brandon Gateman vs. Supreme Machine
**Checklist Match**
Alice Knight (c) vs. Dangerous Dan
**Falls Count Anywhere**
Lurrr (c) vs. D Double D
**Penalty Box Match**
Bob Grenier vs. Mack O'Connor vs. PerZag
**Psychopathic Hell in a Cell**
"The Confederate Icon" Chad Vargas (c) vs. "The Ripper" Danny B
Belvedere: Ladies and gentleman, children of all ages, I urge you to look under your seats, there has been a gift placed their from...
~Belvedere squints to read the rest of the jotting on the paper.~
Belvedere: The greatest man to have ever lived, the very best champion OCW has ever seen, the one, the only true Southern Bad Ass, Chad Vargas.
~The crowd pops at the drop of Vargas' name, as they quickly check under their chairs in unison. Under each and every chair in the arena, is a can of Chad Vargas brand 'Whiskey Blend Copenhagen' chewing tobacco. Everyone is pumped, the women, even the children, as the camera hones in on an 11 year old blow throwing a plug under his lip.~
Smith: Can you believe it? Chad Vargas is getting young children hooked on chaw!
Hood: It's better than being hooked on bath salts!
Smith: The poor soul who has to clean up after the show this place will be littered in spit!
Hood: Hey! Look!
~Hood pulls a can out from under his chair.~
Smith: Well I'll be...
~Smith looks under his chair finding nothing. Hood laughs as he crams in a pinch under his lip.~
Hood: It really tastes like Whiskey!
Smith: Why didn't I....
Hood: Because nobody fucking likes you Smith, duh!
Smith: Alice Knight does.
Hood: Yeah but she's a fucking space cadet!
~Smith and Hood's argument is cut short as the opening chords of Lynyrd Skynyrd's "Needle and the Spoon" controls the OCW sound system, the OCW tron shows all of Vargas' highlights, with the most recent, reversing Mack O'Connors pin for one of his own en route to winning the OCW World Heavyweight championship. Chad Vargas stands atop the entrance ramp, as the crowd erupts at the sight of their champion. Vargas, dressed to the nines for this evening of celebration, rocking a three piece shark skinned suit with a matching off blue tie. Blue tinted Oakleys covering his eyes, every blond hair atop his head is perfectly styled. The OCW championship sits nestled around his waist as he slowly struts down the aisle. Taken back a little by the hometown crowd giving him such an honor, as usually he is booed out of each and every stadium. Vargas stops next to a kid with a 'Vargas is GOD' sign, Vargas' lips can be read as he says "You fuckin' right I am, kid" as he slaps the kid 5. The kid fanboys out completely, as if he we're some teenage girl coming face to face with Justin Bieber. Vargas finally makes his way to the ring and climbs in using the steal steps. He walks to the furthest turnbuckle slips off the OCW title and climbs to the second rope and raises the title in the air as the crowd gets even louder as impossible as that sounds. Vargas hops down and drapes the title over his shoulder as he walks to the podium and stands behind it, after a few minutes the crowd noise fizzles out, Vargas taps the microphone, and begins to speak.~
Vargas: What the fuck is up Knoxville!?
~Crowd pops~
Vargas: It is so fuckin' good to be home. Standing before my home crowd in the best fuckin' state in the great United States of America! I am here as not only OCW World Heavyweight champion, but as YOUR champion! It was this auditorium that I first cut my teeth in professional wrestling some 20 years ago wrestling Tennessee greats such as Johnnie Walker and Captain Hazzard. Hell, Evan Williams died right over there 10 minutes after winning the Southern championship from Tommy O'Dell.
~Vargas points right to where Hood is sitting.~
Hood: WHAT THE FUCK!?!
~Hood jumps nearly 5 feet up out of his seat.~
Vargas: God rest his soul. Standing before y'all is humbling. There we're days that I thought my glory days may be behind me. I always told myself if I felt like I was just a field filler, stuck in the mid card that I would bow out of the sport I love so much. The sport that's been in my family for generations. I know my old man, the great Bagwell Vargas had some amazing matches in this very ring. I wish he could be here to celebrate with me, but since I know he's up there in that wrestling ring in the sky looking down with a smile, all the while kicking the dogshit out of Evan Williams.
~Vargas chuckles at the thought of his beloved father.~
Vargas: Online Championship Wrestling has been near and dear to my heart since my arrival here last spring. It is great to be back, and there are no words for me to describe standing here as OCW champion. It's been a long time coming and to be champion of true greatness that is OCW is indescribable. I talk a lot of shit, and I also back up all my talk, but last month's match at Revenge was truly an epic score. Mack O'Connor was a great champion and continues to be a great talent. Bob Grenier and I have been to hell and back together, as much as I dislike both men, it was an honor to be matched up with them in a crazy ass death defying match, I respect the both of them as bad as I hate to admit it. I tip my hat to the both of them and look forward to our next matchups in the future.
~Vargas reaches into his suit jacket pocket and pulls out a piece of paper.~
Vargas: To enter into the brotherhood with the likes of Silverfreak, Lurrr, Scott Syren, Big Bifford, Andy Murray and Titan 3, I am completely entrenched in honor to be mentioned in the same sentence as those men. The Ballad of Chad Vargas reads simple, and I only have a few people to thank on my road to greatness, first and foremost my wife for supporting me and doin' all she does to keep everything in line back at home while I'm on the road, my boy little Colton Vargas, who will one day bore OCW gold, Rasputin, a strange fella from Canada who I landed my first contract with in NAWA back in 1999, and whom I also defeated for my first World Heavyweight championship reign, Treat Cassidy who has stuck with me thick and thin, sometimes I want to choke his puny neck until he dies under the power of my hands, but always looks out for my best interest. He truly is the best agent/manager money can buy, and I also look at him as a friend, sometimes. Also would like to thank President Dean for believing in me, a middle aged wrestler seemingly past his prime, yet I stand here OCW champion. I also want to thank guys like Mack O'Connor, Bob Grenier, and PerZag who push me to dig down deep and constantly outshine them. Last but not least, I want to thank Hood, for always being pro-Vargas during each and every match of mine.
~The cameras shoot to Hood, who is back in his chair but is still clearly nervous over the possible haunting of Evan Williams.~
Hood: You my nigga, Chad.
~Hood fists his chest and points to Vargas as Smith rolls his eyes. Chad nods faking a smile, as he presses onward with his speech.~
Vargas: Most importantly - I want to thank y'all fans. Not much good to say about most wrestling fans but all y'all before me. Tennessee faithful. Chad Vargas faithful. Who spends their hard earned money on my shit, on tickets to shows just to see me do what I do best. I thank y'all. This championship is yours.
~Vargas raises the championship again as the crowd pops.~
Vargas: I ain't much for speeches, and I sure as fuck ain't much for saying kind things about people. But, if I like ya - I like you, and if I hate ya, well, than I want you fucking dead. I want you hanging from an Oak tree, while I piss on your feet. Some say I'm hateful, some say I take no prisoners. Well, that's just how I roll. I say whats on my mind and half the time it doesn't come out right, but never the less, I don't fuckin' care. Next week, I go into Code of Silence your champion, as I take on a challenger very much less than, in Danny B. Danny B is not deserved of a OCW championship title match. No, don't get it twisted. He's only deserving of an downhome country fried ass whippin' that he's gonna get at the hands of yours truly. He's only my opponent at Code of Silence because I wanted it that way. Treat Cassidy negotiated for it. Don't let Danny B get into your heads with that annoying "wanna kill yourselves" accent of his, trying to make you believe that he is worthy of anything more than death. He is going to have to literally pry this motherfucker out of my cold dead hands. Given what that little emo fuck is bringing to the table, is virtually impossible for him to do. I intend on being y'alls champion for atleast another month!
~Vargas laughs~
Vargas: Danny B is a fucking knat. A knat who will be lynched at Code of Silence by the executioner himself, Chad f'n Vargas. His crime, being prideful, prideful having done nothing to be proud of. His crime, being less than I. His crime, being useless. He will pay for all of his crimes at Code of Silence when I stand over him, after I've beat him senseless, pinned him for the 3 count, and watch him take his last breath. I will stand over him with the World Heavyweight champion raised high over my head. I may just unleash lil' Chad, and piss all over his lifeless carcass, because that's how low I think of Danny B. He's just toilet paper that I wipe my ass with. Trash thrown into a barrel. Talk is cheap, so I'll let the rest play out by my actions, at Code of Silence.
~The crowd cheers at the thought of their Confederate Icon ripping the Ripper to shreds~
Vargas: Thank you, thank all y'all! Enjoy this night, for it is yours!
~Queen's "We are the Champions" begins to play as Chad Vargas waves to his fans once more, as he climbs out of the ring and slowly walks up the ramp soaking it all in.~
Smith: Well, Dean was able to pull it off...he was able to book this show in the ONE location in the entire UNIVERSE where that man would get cheered.
Hood: Hey, dude worked hard, earned the OCW Title...he deserved it. Plus, I beg to differ...if he tossed enough money around in any strip club, he’d get cheered.
Smith: I wouldn’t know anything about that...well, folks, before we get to tonight’s main event...I want to run down a few of the matches we’ve not heard much about tonight that will take place at Code of Silence. Starting with the Oh Shit Contract Match
Hood: I’m going with Simon Magus
Smith: You do that...it’s looking like RM Strong is going to be a tough contender this go around...however, keep your eyes on Tatum Coe and Angelle Laree.
Hood: Noah MafuckingKenzie could steal it too.
Smith: Indeed, a lot of time left between now and Code of Silence...that match, like the Sub Zero match, could steal the show.
Hood: Yep and, who knows, El Presidente might even get re-elected.
Smith: Whatever that means...we also have the Paradigm Title match as Hall of Famer Alice Knight defends against the defending Dangerous Dan.
Hood: I’m being told Bifford will be drugged before and during that one.
Smith: Probably a smart move, to ensure the match is on the up and up...also, we have Lurrr taking on D Double D in defense of his Hall of Fame Title.
Hood: Never trust a man who has to put the word double between two letters to emphasize that there are, in fact, two of the same letter.
Smith: Well, Lurrr does use 3 r’s.
Hood: That match is all kinds of fucked up
Smith: Supreme Machine will face Brandon Gateman for a shot at the Savage Title while, also, potentially cashing in his Oh Shit Contract match on a title of his choosing.
Hood: If he cashes in on the Hall of Fame Title and wins does that automatically induct him.
Smith: That’s not how it works, Hood.
Hood: I was only asking
Smith: And, finally, the number one contenders match as Mack O’Connor and Bob Grenier look to return to the OCW Title picture...in doing so, they not only have to defeat each other, but PerZag.
Hood: Yea, I’m going with Grenier...he’s due.
Smith: I’d love to see Grenier win, but I think PerZag will show that he has shaken off the rust from last month and is ready to return to the top of OCW.
Hood: Wow, nobody picked Mack
Smith: He could easily win it
Hood: You’re always giving him the shaft.
Smith: I didn’t hear YOU picking him
Hood: Ask me again tomorrow, my opinion may change
Smith: That I do not doubt...anyway, folks, the ringside area is set up...we are ready for our main event!
The Lockwood Party (0 pts) vs. Angelus Archer & Caution (0 pts)
~We focus on the ring as Archer and Caution are already inside~
Belvedere: Ladies and Gentlemen, it is now time for our Main Event!! If The Lockwood Party wins, they will earn an OCW Contract! Introducing first, Angelus Archer and Caution!!
~With no music or theatrics, The Lockwood Party make their way to the ring. The crowd boos them crazily, hurling objects at the trio as they make their first publicized OCW appearance. Aimee accompanies Jack and Tim as they reach ringside. Tim slides into the ring with Jack standing on the apron as the bell sounds. Archer starts the match off for his team~
Smith: Pretty obvious OCW didn’t spend any money on the Lockwoods this evening.
Hood: Hey, they got more than Archer and Caution
Smith: That is a startlingly clear observation
Hood: What can I say, I’m on a roll
~About to start the match, something unexpected happens. “Kickstart My Heart” by Motley Crue hits as the crowd rises to their feet and goes nuts upon seeing Awe.Some make their way to the ring. Ricky is handing out jars of ‘~’ to some lucky Tennesseans whereas Randy is smiling and waving. Rachel follows close behind as they reach the ringside area. Tim and Jack stared down at the duo with Aimee glaring at Rachel. The Valdez trio ignore them, heading straight for the announce table~
Smith: Things are about to get interesting!
Hood: You’re telling me, didn’t somebody warn the Valdez family that their kind isn’t wanted in these parts?
Smith: That’s not what I was talking about!
~Randy takes a seat next to Hood who is visibly annoyed by his presence~
Randy Valdez: Hey guys, great night of in ring action so far!
Smith: Well, that’s certainly debatable
~A muffled noise plagues our ears as Ricky steals the only headset away~
Ricky Valdez: Stellar action...I mean that Bifford match is easily a lead candidate for Match of the Month
~Suddenly, Aimee Lockwood walks up and starts hurling curse words at Rachel. Rachel remains composed as Aimee eggs Rachel on to fight her. Rachel simply crosses her legs in a womanly, classy fashion and turns her attention towards her brothers who are wrestling over the headset. She grabs them and lectures them for a moment before Ricky keeps the headset~
Ricky Valdez: Okay, fine, we’ll alternate after every sequence...geez...
Hood: Why don’t you two stand watch over your sister, white trash beautiful over there looks like she’s ready to tear her apart.
Smith: Seriously, Aimee scares me and I’m a man
Hood: You’re no man, let’s get that straight...you are somewhere in between a man and, well, that Geico Gecko.
Smith: That’s strangely hurtful.
Ricky Valdez: Speaking of saving fifteen percent on something...I am here to tell you that ‘~’ is officially 15% off as of right now!
~Tim, like his sister, heads to the ropes nearest the announce table and starts to taunt and hurl insults at Awe.Some. Awe.Some ignores them, continuing to talk up their hair gel which seems to only intensify Tim’s anger. Out of nowhere, Archer rushes in and he rolls Tim up!! Scruff slides in and makes the count~
1!
2!
Kick Out!!!
Smith: Whoa!! The Lockwoods nearly lost their OCW career due to a lapse in conversation!
Hood: That would have been HILARIOUS
Randy Valdez: You think that’s funny
Smith: Oh, hey, it’s Randy...they really are going to switch off
Randy Valdez: You should check out Common.Tary...the greatest thing since some guy decided to put peanut butter on sliced bread.
Smith: Thank you for that, now back to the match
~Tim kicks out and gets to his knees. Archer rolls over and climbs to his feet. He bends down, grabbing Tim by the hair, Tim lunges forward and he bites Archer on the face!! Archer stomps his feet into the mat before shoving Tim’s face away. There’s a giant bite mark in one of Archer’s cheeks. Tim spits some blood out before getting to his feet and kicking Archer in the groin! Archer falls to the mat, huddled over in pain~
Smith: Well, that’s one way to turn the tide
Hood: I was wrong about The Lockwoods...they don’t do meth, they evidently eat bath salts.
Ricky Valdez: Wowza, that guy is hungry...ya know, I’ve been told...not like I’d know from experience...but I’ve been told that ‘~’ tastes a little like Big League chew...perhaps The Lockwoods might want some?
Hood: Is this fucker trying to POISON the Lockwoods?
Smith: No, I honestly think he believes ‘~’ would be a decent source of protein or, at the very least, fruit flavored chewing.
~With Archer down, Tim rushes over and he tags Jack. Jack rushes in and he delivers a picture perfect dropkick into the face of Caution, knocking the old man off the apron and harshly onto the mat surrounding the ring. Caution grabs his knee, evidently injuring it in the fall~
Smith: That doesn’t look good for our former Hardcore Champion
Hood: Fucking senior citizens, man
Randy Valdez: You know, it’s just like the Lockwoods to go around beating up the elderly.
Smith: Normally, I’d agree with you, but they were kind of booked into this match.
~Jack quickly lifts Archer to his feet and slams him into the mat. After Jack does, the OCWTron suddenly comes on as we are being shown a live feed of Lurrr and Maurako at an undisclosed location~
Smith: What is this?
Hood: Hush! It’s Hall of Fame time!
Ricky Valdez: Maybe it IS senior citizen night!
~Lurrr rolls his eyes upon witnessing the Lockwoods and Awe.Some at ringside. He slowly hands his HOF title to Maurako, who holds it for him before speaking~
Lurrr: You didn’t think I’d let an OCW show go by without making an appearance, did you? I’d love nothing more than to be there right now, however, Dean is fully aware that we don’t do charity. You want us in person, you pay us. Now, as far as our Tag Team Title Match at Code of Silence goes...I think this little match we’re all witnessing is a huge waste of time. This whole Awe.Some and Lockwood feud means absolutely nothing in the grand scheme of things because we all know that the minute Maurako and Lurrr signed on the dotted line the OCW brass began engraving our names on those new belts.
~The fans boo Lurrr’s caustic remarks~
Lurrr: Yea, yea, boo all you want, it’s true and that’s why it bothers you. I just wanted to drop by, with my trust side kick, and let you all know that we are focused and ready for Code of Silence. Sure, we don’t attend meaningless fund raisers like tonight’s Massacre, but that doesn’t mean we aren’t in full on preparation mode for Code of Silence. I wish I could say that this match is shaping up to be the biggest one of our careers or, you know, some other wrestling cliche. Sadly, it’s merely a walk in the park...an incident that isn’t any more special than waking up and taking a piss in the morning. Awe.Some, Lockwoods, enjoy your brief moment in the sun today because, come March 29th, we’re snuffing the both of you out.
~The OCWTron goes off as Jack yells at the screen, he’s quickly rolled up by Archer, yet again, as Scruff slides in, making the count~
1!
2!
Kick Out!!
Smith: Another near fall!
Hood: The Lockwoods have the attention span of a fly!
Randy Valdez: Wow, it sure was nice of Lurrr and Maurako to stay up past their bed time to deliver that important message.
~Lockwood quickly gets to his feet, as does Archer. Archer goes for a clothesline, but midway through his swing, receives a thumb into the eye. Jack then hooks Archer and drops him to the mat with a DDT. Lockwood goes for the pin as the ref makes the count~
1!
2!
3!!!!
Belvedere: Here are your winners...THE LOCKWOOD PARTY!!!!!
Smith: They did it...a strange, weird match...but the result remains unblemished...The Lockwoods are going to Code of Silence.
Hood: A couple of cheating bastards, I like em!
~The Lockwood party stands tall in the ring as boos emanate throughout the Thompson Boling Arena. Despite the volume of boos directed at Tom, Jack, and Aimee, not a single member of the Lockwood Party seems to be bothered. They're just standing in the ring as if they are the only people in the building~
Smith: What do you suppose they're waiting for?
~"Voodoo Child" by Jimi Hendrix begins to play over the PA. The fans give a loud pop as President Dean steps out from behind the curtain. The boss man is dressed to impress. He stands there for a brief moment with a microphone in hand. Dean examines the three members of the Lockwood party in the ring while he smooths down his mustache. Jones also appears from behind the curtain and stands next to Dean~
President Dean: Alright suckas listen up! As much as I hate to say it, you did something tonight I was hoping you wouldn't do and that's win. Now you three terrorists, and yes, I'm still using that word to describe you because it falls perfectly in line with what you are...
~The crowd gets riled up again. This seems to bring some emotion out of Tom Lockwood who leans over the top rope and begins yelling at Dean~
President Dean: I said listen up suckas! I'm not done yet!
~More cheers from the crowd~
President Dean: As I was saying. A few weeks ago you three bypassed security to not only ruin one of the best tag team matches OCW has seen in a long time, but you also vandalized private property by throwing the OCW Tag Team Titles over the cliff back in Brazil. I still have every right to have you arrested right now!
Smith: Whoa! How smart would Dean be for that? Tell the Lockwoods to come here tonight only to have them arrested.
Hood: Sounds like a pussy move to me.
~The three members of the Lockwood Party look unmoved by the threat. The crowd is obviously eating this up~
President Dean: ...But I'm a man of my word.
~Silence begins takes over as Jones pulls some papers from his coat pocket. He hands them to Dean who holds them up for the Lockwoods to see~
President Dean: This is your OCW contract. It guarantees you full employment here in my promotion as well as a spot to compete against Maurako, Lurr, and Awe.Some in the scaffold match at Code of Silence. The winner becomes the new OCW Tag Team Champions.
~President Dean hands the papers back to Jones, who then begins to slowly approach the ring~
President Dean: You've made my life a living hell for the past month to get this, so here it is. Sign it suckas.
~With Dean staying behind, Jones makes his way up the ring steps and enters the ring. Jones hands the contract to Jack Lockwood, then reaches into his coat pocket again. Aimee and Tom surround Jones~
President Dean: Relax.
~Jones produces a pen from his coat pocket and hands it to Jack Lockwood. The crowd is giving a mixed reaction of cheers and boos as Jack examines the details of the contract~
President Dean: Sign it.
Randy Valdez: Sign it assholes.
Hood: Please sign it.
~After a period of pause, Jack Lockwood begins to put his signature on the contract. He hands the papers to Tom and Aimee who each sign it, respectively~
President Dean: Congratulations. You all are now, unfortunately, on the OCW roster.
~Jack, Tom, and Aimee all nod their head in agreement, clearly satisfied with this outcome. Then out of nowhere, Jack decks Jones right across the jaw with a closed fist. The crowd begins to boo very loudly as Tom and Jack begin to stomp away at Jones, who is pleading for mercy~
Smith: Uh oh.
Randy Valdez: Damnit.
~Randy throws down the headset as he and Ricky quickly move away from the commentary table~
Hood: Hey assholes those headsets are expensive!
~Ricky and Randy run full speed towards the ring as the Lockwood Party continues their assault on Jones. Aimee sees Awe.Some approaching and quickly exits the ring as Ricky and Randy slide under the bottom rope and head directly for Tom and Jack with punches. The Lockwood party exchanges some blows with Awe.Some as the crowd rises to its feet. Jones begins to crawl out of the ring now that he is no longer being stomped~
Smith: Get out of there Jones!
Hood: Nice contribution Smith.
~Tom Lockwood shoves Ricky to the mat. Ricky rolls backwards to quickly get himself into a kneeling position with one knee. Tom charges towards Ricky perhaps looking for a boot to the head, but Ricky sweeps Tom's legs from under him causing the back of his head to smack hard against the ring mat. Tom grips the back of his head in pain. Randy is locked up with Jack on the other side of the ring. Randy pushes Jack against the ropes, then irish whips Jack towards Ricky who is on the opposite side of the ring. Ricky immediately grabs the top rope near him and falls back, pulling down the rope. Jack Lockwood goes tumbling over the top rope onto the outside of the ring. Tom is now rising to his feet when Ricky and Randy both charge towards him and double clothesline him over the top rope and into the ring side area~
Smith: Welcome to OCW Lockwoods!
Hood: Boy you must've burned the midnight oil with the material you're working with for this show.
Smith: How can you not have any excitement about what is happening right now?!
Hood: Easy.
~The crowd is cheering loudly as "Kickstart My Heart" plays over the PA. All three members of the Lockwood Party are standing outside the ring flipping off Awe.Some and speaking obscenities towards the Valdez brothers~
Smith: Awe.Some looks ready...the Lockwoods are officially signed to OCW and Lurrr/Maurako are evidently preparing hardcore for their tag opportunity...I’d say Code of Silence is looking better than ever!
Hood: This music sucks!
Smith: I rather enjoy it...but, hey, folks, thanks for tuning in tonight for a unique, mid month edition of Massacre...don’t forget, we are only 2 weeks away from Code of Silence when everything you’ve seen tonight, plus much more will come to a head...see you then!
~We fade to black~