LIVE! Monday, April 10th 2017
From The OCW Arena in Key West, Florida
~Some type of epic music begins to play as the word ‘Genesis’ flashes on our screen. The logo from the OCW Pay Per View is shown. We cut straight to clips from a match featuring MJ Bell and PerZag for the OCW Title. It’s back and forth. We cut to the actual action rather than clips~
~MJ has dragged PerZag back into the middle of the ring and reapplied the Sharpshooter! PerZag has his hand out, his face a bloody mess, as he is screaming in pain. PerZag taps out~
Smith: AND IT’S OVER!
Hood: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
Smith: MJ HAS DEFIED THE ODDS!
Hood: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!!!
Smith: THE UNDERDOG HAS DONE IT!!!
Belvedere: Here is your winner…. AND NEW OCW WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION… MJ BELL!!!
~The music ends with a triumphant MJ Bell standing over a defeated PerZag~
Voice: Three years ago PerZag fought his way to the top of OCW with a shot at the ultimate prize. In his way stood MJ Bell. PerZag fell short that day…a loss that has plagued him ever since. Tonight, in 2017, PerZag has a chance to avenge that loss. Tonight PerZag has a chance to erase that memory and replace it with something more worthy. Tonight PerZag has a chance to finally walk out of an OCW event as its champion.
~We fade out. The logo of Massacre flashes. We cut to the jam packed OCW Arena as the fans are on their feet super pumped…some might say a little TOO pumped for tonight’s event. We look over all the signs in the arena. “STORMS ARE IN THE FORECAST FOR TONIGHT!” “I WANT IGGY TO GET INTENSE ALL OVER MY BODY!!” “NATHAN SHOCKS THE WORLD TONIGHT…OR, AT THE VERY LEAST, KEY WEST AND STARZ!” “I MARVEL AT MATT MEYHU!” “CHAD VARGAS DESERVES BETTER!” “AIRE RAYDER WILL SOAR TONIGHT!” “CHAOTIC AND REBEL…IN THE SAME RING? MY GOODNESS!!” “DAMIAN K’ WILL CRIPPLE STEROID BOY!” “I WANNA GET TO KNOW JADE SPITZ!” the man’s wife immediately corrects his sign and adds an R…we see the man read the new sign, rip it up and say ‘never mind.’ “RUBY ROSE!!!!” “BRADLEY CARRINGTON IS GOING TO ‘CARRY’ JACK PUFFER TONIGHT” the idiot with this sign looks very proud of his pun. He’s instantly beat up by everyone around him. His sign is destroyed. “KODI DON’T NEED NO STINKIN LAST NAME!” And, finally we see two signs focused on the main event. “HISTORY WILL REPEAT ITSELF, GO MJ!” “IF PERZAG LOSES WE WILL RIOT!” one of the faceless men slowly approaches…the man quickly adjusts his sign, “IF PERZAG LOSES WE WILL GRUMBLE ANGRILY BUT ULTIMATELY SAY NOTHING.” The faceless man disappears as we cut to the announce team of Smith and Hood~
Smith: Hello everyone and welcome to Monday Night Massacre!
Hood: Just when you think those faceless fuckers are gone they pop back up
Smith: Yes, very uncomfortable
Hood: Did you know Ruby Rose is debuting tonight?
Smith: Yes…that sign with all those exclamation points made it abundantly clear
Hood: I hear she’s smokin
Smith: She seems to be a very attractive woman. We have three other rookies debuting, you know
Hood: Meh, I’ve never been a fan of rookies. Unless they look like Ruby Rose or dress up like Brianna Casablancas.
Smith: Makes sense…we also have a tremendous mid card this evening as Chaotic takes on Rebel
Hood: Whoa…rebellion versus chaos…that’s interesting. Chaos seems more uncontrollable, right?
Smith: I’d say so
Hood: Rebellion is more that shit from teenagers
Smith: Or wrestling co-hosts named Hood
Hood: Hey! I have never, EVER bleached my hair
Smith: Assassin fresh off his disappointing loss last week will take on Mark Storm who had an impressive win against Jake E Dangerously
Hood: Uh oh, I’m receiving news that the clouds
Smith: AND, moving along…Damian K’, the Oh Shit Contract holder, will face Mr. Intensity himself…Iggy Hardy!
Hood: Ah geez…kids, hide your mothers!
Smith: Chad Vargas looks to snap his ridiculous losing streak against Robbie Rayder
Hood: If he can’t beat Robbie Rayder…well, he may as well drink more than usual
Smith: That’s dangerous levels of alcohol consumption, Hood
Hood: Desperate times, desperate measures
Smith: In our semi main event Matt Meyhu will face Nathan Dravers for a shot at Mack O’Connor and his Savage Championship.
Hood: Meyhu in the semi-main event…now THAT’s something worth rioting over
Smith: And, in our main event…OCW Champion MJ Bell defends her title against PerZag…it’s a rematch from the main event of Genesis.
Hood: Wasn’t that a triple threat or am I hallucinating?
Smith: Insignificant details, Hood. What matters is that PerZag has a shot at MJ Bell and the OCW Title tonight…he could finally accomplish the one feat lacking on his resume.
Hood: Go PerZag! I’m no fan of Australia…hate the place, in fact. Crocodile Dundee was a shit movie and kangaroos are fucking weird. But PerZag, he’s okay.
Smith: Expert analysis as always, Hood. Well folks, we've got ten matches, tonight...TEN
Hood: Yes, that's one more than nine and one less than eleven...wow!
Smith: You're on point tonight, Hood. Let's head down to ringside to get this evening started as Kodi Theroux makes his OCW debut
Hood: Who is Kodi THEROUX?
Smith: Formerly known as Kodi
Hood: Oh, so he found a last name? Was it under a rock?
Smith: I don't think that's how it works...seems like it might have got lost during the application process
Hood: CLLLLLLLLASSIC OCW BABY!
~Shootah is already in the ring looking scared and near sick with mental trauma~
Belvedere: Ladies and Gentlemen…this match is scheduled for one fall!! Introducing first, from Hollywood, California…standing 6’3 and weighing in at 180lbs…Shootah!!!
~”Out of the Black” by Royal Blood hits. Kodi Theroux, OCW’s newest signing emerges from behind the curtain. The fans don’t quite know how to react. But there is an aura to him that they find intriguing. He makes his way down the ramp and keeps his focus on Shootah. Shootah gets one look at Kodi and swallows hard. Kodi enters into the ring and is prepared for action~
Belvedere: And his opponent, from Tampa, Florida…standing 6’3 and weighing in at 215lbs…Kodi Theroux!!!
~The bell rings~
Smith: Big opportunity here for Kodi Theroux…I’ve heard great things about him.
Hood: He looks the part, I’ll give him that. If you were basing a guy’s talent on looks, Kodi would be like a nine, maybe a 9.95!
Smith: Shootah?
Hood: SUB ZERO
~Kodi approaches Shootah. He yells while experiencing Vietnam like flashbacks of his previous in ring encounters. He tries to escape. Kodi shows bravery, grabbing Shootah by his nasty, unwashed hair. He pulls him into the ring and headbutts Shootah!! Shootah falls to the mat, holding his forehead in pain~
Smith: I don’t think this is going to last very long
Hood: Shootah is the quickest draw in the west!
Smith: We’re on the east coast
Hood: Probably why his career is suffering so much
~Kodi pulls Shootah back to his feet and gets him in the clench. He then proceeds to pound Shootah’s already messed up face with a barrage of bicycle knees!! Each one is flush. Kodi finally stops and Shootah falls to the mat, his nose is bleeding~
Smith: I don’t think Shootah could have been given a worse opponent
Hood: I bet Kodi Theroux could win the Tour de France!
Smith: You think?
Hood: Oh sure, did you not see those knees? Guy can cycle, buddy!
~Kodi doesn’t relent…he pulls Shootah up and superkicks him into his bony, scrawny abdomen! Shootah falls into the ropes…he bounces off and Kodi pops him up…Shootah falls to the ring and is drilled in the face with a knee lift!!! Shootah screams in pain and holds his face. He falls onto his face and kicks his knees, continuing to yell. Fans nearby feel sorrow for the man who should not be wrestling~
Smith: I think we need to go ahead and just make Shootah retire
Hood: I don’t want to LEAVE THE MEMORIES ALONE Smith…not yet
Smith: He might die in that ring, Hood. That is a real possibility
Hood: Think of the ratings if that happened…STARZ would love us
Smith: Uhh…what?
Hood: Have you seen Spartacus? That show STARZ aired…like twenty people died a week on that show
Smith: That was fiction you idiot!
~Kodi grows tired of Shootah’s ululations. He pulls him up, knees him in the gut and drops him to the mat with a Double Arm DDT. Shootah is silenced. Kodi then quickly transitions into a bridging double chicken wing!!! Shootah wakes up and screams “TAP ME OUT! TAP ME OUT! I CAN’T MOVE MY FUCKING ARMS FOR THE LOVE OF HUMANITY TAP ME OUT!!!!” Scruff calls for the bell~
Belvedere: Here is your winner…KODI THEROUX!!!!!
Smith: Impressive…dominating…Kodi Theroux is everything he was advertised to be
Hood: Well, he was advertised to be a man who wrestles…so, yea, I’d agree
Smith: Be serious…this man has star quality and oozes potential
Hood: He could be good, I agree….but he’s gotta do it against better talent than fucking Shootah
Smith: I won’t argue that…well folks, let’s head backstage!
~Rebel enters the arena to loud cheers from the fans, he is entering from the parking lot, and has a determined look set on his face, as he comes in, Jones approaches him with a smile, and a mic~
Jones: Rebel, it has been a while since any of us have had a chance to talk to you. Since you lost that Paradigm title match, you've been a hard man to pin down, do you have some time for a few words about that?
~Rebel looks a little pushed for time, but smiles, and nods~
Rebel: No problem Jones, but listen, first thing, if you need to know who it was that pulled me backstage after the match, I'll be letting everyone know, out in the ring. The guys upstairs finally released the footage to me, so I can finally clarify who it was, and what they wanted.
~Jones looks taken aback momentarily, then returns the same smile as usual to his face~
Jones: Well that'll be good to see, but listen, what I really wanted to ask, is, about your opponent this Evening, Chaotic. He hasn't had any kind words to say for you.
~Rebel laughs~
Rebel: Yeah, i'm glad we're bringing up the poison dwarf Chaotic. You see, week in week out here, I go out of my way to give respect to my opponents, when they deserve it, but Chaotic seems to think he's found a better way to deal with more experienced people, which is to mock their entire being relentlessly. That wouldn't necessarily be an issue, but the hypocrisy he shows in doing so, is. You see, he talks about people lacking originality, yet if I go down to Mexico, catch a show, guys like him are a dime a dozen. He seems like every other masked wrestler to me, yet he calls me some generic biker.
Listen Chaotic, you may have been racking up some impressive wins here these last few weeks, but tonight, you can add a second L, to your ranking. We'll have a great match, but come the end of the night, you're not coming out the winner, and you'll head into your championship opportunity against Shade, with your misguided confidence shattered. Listen Jones, I'm really sorry, but I need to get ready to reveal a few things in the arena, so I really need to go.
~Jones nods, as Rebel carries on walking towards the locker rooms. After a moment, a tall man, dressed entirely in black walks into the shot, he watches after Rebel for a moment, before walking off in the other direction, Jones looks terrified. We cut back to ringside~
Smith: Sounds like Rebel is ready for Chaotic this evening AND is going to reveal who pulled him backstage after his loss to The Incredible One
Hood: Are we SURE he didn't trip and fall through the curtain?
Smith: Yes, the man is far too athletic to make that kind of error
Hood: I don't know...I hope he didn't cause it'd be awfully embarrassing to show footage of him falling down some stairs
Smith: That is NOT going to be on the footage
Hood: Of course, he seems like a smart guy. He could just adlib and say a GHOST pulled him down those steps. Then we could have some type of ghost conspiracy going on...would be wild.
Smith: MOVING ALONG...next up we have the debut of Jade Spritz.
Hood: Ooohhh, I like that last name, Smith!
Smith: Easy, Hood...but before we get down to the match, take a look at who is sitting ringside
Hood: Is it Steve Martin?!
Smith: What? Why? No...it's not
Hood: Damn
Smith: It's OCW's newest signing...a man known as "The Icon" Shawn Rossdale.
~A man is standing at ringside. The fans acknowledge his presence. The name "The Icon" Shawn Rossdale is displayed on the screen. He doesn't react much, keeping a serious look on his face. He takes a seat and focuses on the ring~
Smith: Shawn Rossdale will be making his OCW debut next week!
Hood: Sweet, looks like a solid signing...and the fact he's here a week early, that's gotta mean something
Smith: I'm told the man doesn't take this sport lightly. He's here to compete and he's here to win. We'll all see what he has in store for OCW next week. Until then, it's time for the debut of Jade Spritz...let's head down to ringside!
Jade Spritz (0-0) vs. Tatum Coe (0-3)
~Tatum Coe is already in the ring~
Belvedere: Ladies and Gentlemen, the following match is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, from Miami Beach, Florida…standing 6’2 and weighing in at 215lbs…Tatum Coe!!!
~”Lola Montez” by Volbeat begins to play. The fans stand and watch as the sultry Jade Spritz saunters her way down to ringside. She’s very decisive in her motions, heading directly to the ring. She ascends the steps and enters through the ropes. She looks across at Coe. He throws a wink her way. She offers a passing smile, nothing to get excited over~
Belvedere: And his opponent, from Los Angeles, California…standing 5’11 and weighing in at 170lbs…Jade Spritz!!!
~The bell rings~
Smith: Okay, I’m just going to get this out of the way RIGHT NOW
Hood: Is something obstructing your view?
Smith: There will be NO SPITS or SPITZ jokes during this match
Hood: I would never!
Smith: I know your ways, Hood
~Spritz and Coe circle one another. Coe stops and he whistles with his hand. A waiter emerges from behind the curtain carrying a tray. Atop the tray is a drink of some kind. Spritz looks up the ramp and narrows her vision to identify the item. The waiter walks up the steps and enters into the ring. Coe leans into a corner with a smile of approval~
Smith: What is THIS?
Hood: What a gentleman, he saw that Spritz was thirsty…perhaps she didn’t have much
Smith: Watch it…
Hood: SALIVA in her mouth and ordered a drink, immediately
Smith: It appears to be a dirty martini
~Spritz removes the drink from the tray. She’s slightly confused as anyone would be in this situation. The waiter refuses any form of payment which is weird because Spritz didn’t reach for any money. He says very loud and obviously, “Compliments of Mr. Coe!” He turns and exits the ring. Spritz looks at Coe who smiles back and says “Drink up.” She brings the weekend libation to her lips~
Smith: So now people can just booze it up inside an OCW ring
Hood: Did you not see Mack O’Connor swilling that Jameson back at Like There’s No Tomorrow? This is nothing new
Smith: I had such high hopes for Jade…and now she’s going to be an in ring lush!
Hood: One drink does not a lush make, Smith
~She takes the smallest sip in the history of sips. So small a sip would feel slighted to be mentioned in the same breath. Coe walks up and stands next to her…he puts his arm around her waist. “Tastes good, doesn’t it?” he asks. She nods and then tosses the drink in his face!! He staggers into a corner with his eyes shut…the alcohol stinging his vision. Jade tosses the glass out of the ring. Coe yells “FUCKING BITCH!” with his eyes still shut. She charges in and drills him in the face with a running knee~
Smith: Alright! There’s hope for Jade yet!
Hood: What a whore! That drink had to set Tatum back at least twenty bucks…when you factor in the waiter. Women have no concept of cash, I swear
Smith: Pretty sexist statement
Hood: Let’s not allow bullshit terms like ‘sexism’ get in the way of cold hard facts!
Smith: I’m just gonna end this line of dialogue
~Sprits places the top of her head under Coe’s jaw. She drops to her knees and rattles his teeth with a jaw breaker!! Coe staggers forward, toward the middle of the ring. She hops onto the middle rope and leaps off, kicking him in the back of the head!! Coe falls into the ropes, hanging over the middle rope. She sprints in, swings around and nails him in the face with a 619!!! He falls back into the middle of the ring~
Smith: Wow, quite the impressive in ring arsenal
Hood: Holy shit…she’s like a black widow…a maneater…a vagina with TEETH
Smith: Disgusting
Hood: So glad that’s an urban legend and not reality. I’d hate to see a vagina eat a pizza
Smith: GROSS
~Spritz pulls Coe to his feet and hooks him for the beginning of a DDT. She says aloud “Thanks for the drink.” She then drops him with a Twist of Fate in the center of the ring!!! He flips over, onto his back unconscious. Jade covers him for the pin~
1!
2!
3!!!!
~The bell rings~
Belvedere: Here is your winner…JADE SPRITZ!!!!!
Smith: What a quick and decisive win…she ended it with her finisher…a move she calls Femme Fatale!
Hood: Last time Coe will ever buy her a drink…good going, woman! That man has enough money to buy a million drinks!
Smith: I don’t think she’s concerned with getting liquored up for free
Hood: Why not? Everybody should be concerned with that…a free drink is like a winning lottery ticket
Smith: I’m sorry if I don’t share your enthusiasm over something so trivial
Hood: That woman needs to get her priorities straightened out
Smith: She seems fine to me…Jade Spritz with a very impressive debut. Let’s head backstage!
~We cut backstage where a limousine is seen pulling up to the OCW arena. The back door opens. A giant man clad in black steps out. It’s Plethora the Perilous! He stands, stoic and silent. Next is Annie Alvarez, dressed in jeans and a form fitting OCW shirt. She looks up at Plethora, nervously. Behind her emerges OCW GM Marcus Welsh. He’s wearing slacks, a sports coat and a white, buttoned up shirt. He hands the driver some cash and looks toward Annie~
Marcus Welsh: Alright, hopefully we can…
~He spots the OCW cameras and sighs, lowering his head~
Marcus Welsh: So much for sneaking in here and keeping my presence a secret. Hey, big guy…how about you get those cameras out of here and work as my security?
~Plethora looks at Annie. Something about his body language states that he is insulted by the job offer. Annie’s eyes widen as she surreptiously urges him to accept. Welsh isn’t paying much attention, he’s fiddling with his heavy watch~
Annie Alvarez: Plethora has NO problem with that, Marcus.
Marcus Welsh: Terrific…keep all unwanted traffic away from me big guy and I’ll toss you a couple hundred bucks at the end of the night. Shall we?
~He opens his arm, Annie locks hers around it and they enter into the OCW Arena with Plethora keeping all cameras away from the GM. We cut back to ringside~
Smith: General Manager Marcus Welsh is here!
Hood: Yep, it’s a big night…you can tell the OCW Title is on the line.
Smith: Indeed…I wonder if his presence will yield any major announcements?
Hood: I heard a rumor, just a rumor, so it might not be true…but I heard a rumor he’s going to announce that he’s signed on to produce John E Depth’s next film!
Smith: I hate you. You actually had me for a minute
Hood: You’re awesome, don’t ever change, buddy
~The fans around the arena are as excited as ever, awaiting the next match, when "Slow Me Down" by the Devin Townsend Band starts up. They begin to cheer loudly, before the applause signs have even lit up, and after a few moments, Rebel emerges from behind the curtain with his arms outstretched, he looks around the arena as he approaches the ring, and climbs the corners to salute the fans, before he calls for a mic. He waits for his music to die down, and patiently for the fans to finish cheering~
Rebel:This...Is my....something about dogs, and yards, I don't know, sounded like hyperbole to me.
~Some fans laugh, Rebel continues~
Rebel: Now folks, I'm out here, for the first time since that battle of words between the Incredible Yawn and myself, before my unfortunate defeat. I'm here, because you guys deserve an explanation, for what happened to me after that match. I was distracted by an impending threat of attack, from a dangerous psychopath, so no doubt, you thought that might be the guy who got to me. I had to dig, and I had to beg backstage, for someone to release the backstage footage to me, so I could not just tell you, but show you, what went down. Please, roll the tape.
~After a few seconds video of the end of the Paradigm Championship match between Rebel and the Incredible One comes up onscreen, it shows Rebel walking up the ramp, then a pair of black gloved hands, dragging him backstage. The shot now cuts to backstage, where Rebel is pushing away a man with a snake head mask over his own head. Rebel pushes the man down, and holds him there for a moment, they are having a heated conversation, and after a few moments, Rebel helps the man up, and now seems to have a grudging look on his face, before shaking the hand of the man, who walks away. The shot cuts back to Rebel, in the ring~
Rebel: I felt a visual aid was required to clarify the situation. That night, while I was concerned about the appearance of the lunatic Andreas Morse, another group of people were worried. Those were the people I tried to keep him away from, the Brotherhood of the Viper, a shady secret society, full of spoilt rich kids and old people who wouldn't know a hard days work if it bit them on the ass. For those that remember, those assholes, released Morse, so as you could see, I was suitably pissed off about them making their way to the arena, and that they were allowed to get right there at the exit of the stage. I was surprised then, to hear that they now want me to help them stop the man they stupidly released, and while I hate to team up with a crowd of backstabbing snakes, I had no choice but to offer my assistance, in no small part because I don't trust that when they get him, their intention is to put a stop to him. So I'm sorry guys, I was MIA a couple of weeks, mulling over the consequences of this, and although I've been back a couple of weeks, I could only now show the footage, something about licensing, I thought we owned it all, but apparently it still takes time. So listen, I have a feeling, that Morse has his eyes and ears on the show in one way or another, and I want him to know, I'm waiting...
~The lights suddenly drop, until nothing can be seen in the arena, the opening strains of "Vigil" by Lamb of God fill the arena, Rebel still has a live mic~
Rebel: Come get it Morse, lets do this face to face.
~The lights come back up to reveal a man dressed in black leather standing halfway down the entrance ramp, the lights flicker off and on again, when they come back on the man is a few steps closer. This repeats a couple of times until the man is standing on the ring apron, Rebel looks perplexed~
Rebel: You're not him, what the hell...where is that asshole.
~The light again drops, this time it stays down for a while, purple smoke starts to build up on the stage, until it is a massive cloud, which twists and churns slowly, some red light flickers through it from time to time, suddenly a laser light shoots down from up in the arena, and illuminates the massive outline of a man in the smoke, the lyrics of the song kick in and there is a big explosion, on the screen the words "IT BEGINS" are emblazoned, the lights come up, and only Rebel stands in the arena, he looks around, rubs his chin with his hand, and raises the microphone~
Rebel: Well, looks like the game has begun, sorry folks, OCW is about to get a lot more dangerous.
~Rebels music starts up again, as he leaves the ring area. We focus on the announce team~
Smith: As if an OCW in ring career isn't enough...now Rebel has all of THIS to deal with
Hood: Hey, he started it...probably weaved right in front of that guy on the freeway...you know how those bikers do. Think they can just weave in and out...drive up the shoulder, pisses me off
Smith: That would be a very elongated, vengeful case of road rage...but he needs to get his head right. He's got Chaotic, in the ring later tonight.
Hood: Well, if he lacks any focus that psycho Chaotic will bring it back...he's insane
Smith: I definitely agree with that. I'm just concerned this Morse fellow might begin to impact, negatively OCW and its programming
Hood: I say bring it on! We already have a vampire...Morse should fit right in!
Smith: Right...well folks, while we get everyone around ringside calmed down...let's head backstage
~ The camera fades backstage and you see “The Distinguished” CJ O’Donnell inside a locker room and he has about a dozen red roses in his hand. He starts by the door and about every foot or so he drops a single rose on the floor. When he reaches the bench he places a red rose in the middle of the bench. With only one red rose left in his hand he goes to hide between the locker room in and the wall. As the door opens in walks the newest signee of Online Championship Wrestling Ruby Rose.
She makes her way into the room and stops immediately at the first rose her foot bumps into. Looking around the room with confusion, a smile eventually spreads across her face and she picks up the first rose. Bringing it to her nose, she inhales the sweet scent and then continues into the room collecting each rose one by one until she reaches the bench. She places the now-bouquet onto the bench and looks around the room, curiously. ~
Ruby Rose:"CJ?"
~CJ steps out from where he was hiding with his right hand behind his back as he approaches Ruby~
CJ O'Donnell: “Was it that obvious?”
~ Her smile gets bigger when she lays eyes on CJ in her room. ~
Ruby Rose:"Well, I'd hope it was no one else."
~ As CJ stands in front of Ruby he removes his hand from behind his back and shows her the twelfth and final red rose. ~
CJ O'Donnell: “A dozen roses for the ruby in my life.”
Ruby Rose:"You didn't have to do this.”
~ But the smile on her face says she's beyond glad that he did, and she accepts the rose without a fight. Unlike the others she left lying on the bench, the one directly from CJ remains in her hands as she smiles up at him. ~
CJ O'Donnell: “I know I didn't have to but I wanted to. It's my way of welcoming you to OCW. Looking forward to seeing you in action tonight.”
~ Ruby takes a deep breath, letting it out slowly with a nod. ~
Ruby Rose: "Yeah. I'm getting more nervous the closer it gets.”
CJ O'Donnell: “No reason to be nervous you are going to win tonight I can feel it in my gut. Tonight the entire world gets to know what Ruby Rose is all about. You are going to shine like a ruby!”
~ CJ's words put a smile on her face and seemingly go a long way in working out the nerves, though they're still lingering behind slightly. ~
Ruby Rose:" Well, I wouldn't say the whole world gets to know me. Just those who aren't skipping this event."
CJ O'DOnnell: “Then I guess I'll just have to force everyone to watch you to show just how fabulous you are.”
~ CJ is obviously joking but it trying to lighten the mood and get Ruby at ease for her OCW debut match. ~
CJ O'Donnell: “I have complete faith in you and I'll be wherever you want me cheering you on.
~ Her smile gets a little wider and she nods her appreciation for CJ's support. ~
Ruby Rose:"Thank you. For everything. For getting me here, for helping me along the way, and for just being there for me. I really appreciate everything."
CJ O'Donnell: “You're welcome but you don't have to thank me. I am glad you decided to sign with OCW. We can be the modern day beauty and the beast.”
~ CJ smirks at Ruby but she doesn't look too convinced, judging by the expression on her face. ~
Ruby Rose: "Really? You think I could pull off beast mode?”
~ With a sly grin on her face, she pretends to think about whether or not she could be the beast in their pairing. ~
CJ O'Donnell: “You know just because you are cute doesn't mean you can be a smart ass. I am far from the beauty one in this relationship. All I want you to do is focus on yourself in the ring. Block out the crowd. Wrestle towards your strengths. If you see an opportunity do not hesitate. Don't second guess yourself. Got it?”
~ Obviously CJ is trying to get Ruby pumped up for the match. Ruby takes a deep breath and slowly lets it out before a thought occurs her. ~
Ruby Rose: "Block out the crowd? Don't I want to win them over?"
~ She looks like her entire game plan just fell apart. ~
CJ O'Donnell: “They may boo you I am not exactly well liked in Key West. I don't want them to get inside your head if they start shouting obscenities at you. Better yet why don't you just follow your heart. It hasn't steered you wrong yet.”
~ Ruby smirks at him and gives him a gentle poke in the stomach. ~
Ruby Rose: "You would say that."
CJ O'Donnell: “You like to poke me don't you?”
~ Ruby shrugs. ~
Ruby Rose: "You don't like it?"
CJ O'Donnell: “I thought my job was to do the poking.”
~ CJ has a sly smirk on his face and Ruby knows exactly what CJ means. ~
CJ O'Donnell: “Don’t worry payback is gonna be pleasureable after you win tonight.”
~ Ruby draws back from CJ and gives him a slightly offended look. ~
Ruby Rose: "You think I'm letting anyone pin me tonight? Keep dreaming."
CJ O'Donnell: “No one said anything about pinning your shoulders but you may tap out later.”
~ CJ winks at Ruby. ~
CJ O'Donnell: “But keep focused Ruby and stop getting off topic…”
~ CJ laughs as he knows he was the one who got off topic. ~
Ruby Rose: "I am focused. You're the one focused on other things."
~ She pokes him again. ~
CJ O'Donnell: “Really … again with the poking ...”
~ CJ just stares at Ruby. ~
CJ O'Donnell: “You are focused on the wrong thing but don’t worry you’ll get dinner out of it.”
~ Ruby shakes her head and then bops the rose against his chest. ~
Ruby Rose: "Hold this for me. I've got a match to win."
CJ O'Donnell: “I'll be watching closely backstage.”
~ As Ruby has her hand in the middle of his chest CJ sees the opportunity to give a small kiss on her lips. ~
CJ O'Donnell: “Good luck Ruby.”
~ She smiles and rises up on her toes to give him a quick kiss on the lips. ~
Ruby Rose: "Hopefully I won't need it."
~ With a wink, she heads out the door. CJ stares at Ruby's ass as she exits the locker room. ~
CJ O'Donnell: “Man that ass is a thing of beauty. How did I ever get so lucky…”
~ The camera goes back to Smith and Hood at ringside. ~
Smith: Ruby Rose is set to debut later tonight...it's a debut I've been looking forward to for quite some time
Hood: Settle down, perv. Or else I'll tell CJ you're mackin on his woman!
Smith: I am not 'macking' on his woman
Hood: Oh, yes you were...I saw that twinkle in your eye
Smith: To sit here and deny the beauty of Ruby Rose would be foolish...but I have no designs on Miss Rose aside from watching her career evolve and hopefully ascend in OCW
Hood: Just reach out and grab it, buddy. Twist that knob and walk through that door...we all know you're gay...just come on out, bro!
Smith: I will not justify such a crude jab with a retort...instead, I will move along like the professional that I am. Folks, up next we have the debut of Bradley Carrington! Let's head down to ringside
~Jack Puffer is already in the ring. He’s looking around for things~
Belvedere: Ladies and Gentlemen….the following match is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, from Aurora, Illinois…standing 6’2 and weighing in at 215lbs…’Detective’ Jack Puffer!!!
~”The Greatest Man that Ever Lived” By Weezer begins to play. Bradley Carrington steps onto the stage, wearing a grey t shirt that says "Carrington" in red letters on it, the 'C' has a graduate cap over it. He is reading a copy of his book: "Being the Best at Everything, the Bradley Carrington Story". He pauses, as if he is moved by his own writing, before closing the book and walking towards the ring. As he approaches the ring, he picks a fan in the front row, signs the book, and hands it to them. He jumps onto the ring apron, climbs in between the ropes, and poses for photos from his adoring fan. He removes his t shirt and waits for the match to begin~
Belvedere: And his opponent, from Ithaca, New York…standing six feet tall and weighing in at 205lbs…Bradley Carrington!!!
~The bell rings~
Smith: If there’s one thing we already know about Bradley Carrington…it’s that he’s really high on Bradley Carrington
Hood: He’s already got fans! Did you see that photo he took with that adoring, wild, uncontrollable fan of his? Imagine what might happen after this match…he might have TWO fans, Smith!
Smith: That was his wife, Autumn
Hood: Well, when Summer blows you off, you have to settle for Autumn, I suppose
Smith: Rude
~Puffer exits the ring, holding up his index finger. He walks near the crowd and finds the fans who received and autographed copy of Carrington’s autobiography. He asks for it. The fans yells back, “PLEASE TAKE IT!” and throws a few dollar bills at Puffer. Puffer pockets them because he’s a terrible detective who doesn’t make any money. He opens the book and begins to read through it. Scruff yells out “ONE!” while Carrington watches, patiently from inside the ring~
Smith: Carrington seems okay with these shenanigans
Hood: That’s because the good detective is reading his work…he’s probably going to give him a detailed review. I hear the good detective is not only a scholar AND a gentleman…but a speed reader to boot!
Smith: If only he could wrestle
Hood: Oh he can…he’s applied a head lock once or twice
~Puffer searches through the pages feverishly. Carrington looks over at Scruff who yells “SEVEN!” He seems content with taking a win via count out. Puffer’s eyes finally widen…he yells “I FOUND IT!” The camera zooms in as Puffer points at the word ‘body’ on the left page and then the word ‘slam’ near the end of the right page. He looks at the camera, ‘I have discovered through my art of detection that Sir Bradley Carrington has a very dangerous body slam. I will avoid the body slam at all costs.’ Scruff yells “NINE!”~
Smith: I don’t know about any body slams, but I do know he’s going to get counted out of he doesn’t get back inside that ring
Hood: Wow! He found that in all those words…what a great detective!
Smith: The two words didn’t even go together…he is a horrible detective
Hood: I PLEAD to differ
Smith: Stop it with this nonsense about Jack Puffer being a good detective
~Puffer hurries and slides into the ring. He gets to his feet and is IMMEDIATELY bodyslammed by Carrington. The crowd half laughs, half groans. Puffer arches his back and yells, “IT’S EVERY BIT AS WICKED AND PAINFUL AS I FEARED!” He falls onto his front side and lays there for a while~
Smith: Well, so much for that
Hood: You know Weezer wrote a song about Carrington, right?
Smith: I’m pretty sure he just says that
Hood: No way, I think Weezer read his book and then found inspiration to write a song. I hear they are currently working on another future hit titled ‘BODYSLAM’
Smith: Right
~Carrington yanks Puffer to his feet. His wife, Autumn cheers from ringside. He hooks Puffer’s head under his arm and drops him with a swift and effective DDT. Puffer, again, remains laying on his face, not moving much. Carrington sits up and methodically returns to his feet. There doesn’t appear to be any danger in his way at this juncture~
Smith: The good detective might be, well, finished
Hood: But what a ride, Smith. WHAT A RIDE
Smith: Yea, more like one of those carnival rides that gets stuck midway in the air
Hood: We had one of those at our Pre-Show before Like There’s No Tomorrow, didn’t we?
Smith: Thankfully The Knife Man was able to remedy the issue in short order
~Puffer starts to move. He gets to his knees with his head hanging, his eyes staring at the mat. He finally lifts his head and looks at Carrington. Carrington charges in and nearly kicks his head off with Bomaye!!! Puffer falls back to the mat, knocked out. Carrington poses for the crowd, arrogantly. They boo vociferously. He responds with “Thank you, thank you, I appreciate you all as well”~
Smith: The man is delusional!
Hood: Nah, he’s just one of those glass half full kinda guys
Smith: Wrong…he’s seeing water that isn’t even there
Hood: Well water IS clear, I mean, it wouldn’t be THAT hard to miss inside a glass
Smith: Whatever
~Carrington bends over and grabs Puffer’s head. He then positions his legs, cinches in the lock and applies a Triangle Choke!! Puffer’s arms wave around a little, at first. But they soon deaden. He hangs there, limp. He could be dead, for all we know. Scruff looks at him, pondering many things about life and Jack Puffer’s pulse~
Smith: Bradley Carrington calls this The Cornell Clutch!
Hood: I don’t care what he calls it…he’s going to win with it, Puffer is OUT
Smith: Indeed!
~Scruff walks over and lifts Puffer’s right arm. It falls to the mat. Scruff goes for a second time but decides to make a judgment call. He signals for the bell, it rings~
Belvedere: Here is your winner…BRADLEY CARRINGTON!!!!!
~Carrington holds onto the Cornell Clutch far longer than he should. Finally, after a few urgent words from Autumn, he lets go and leaps to his feet. He poses for the crowd to a chorus of boos. Scruff checks on the good detective~
Smith: Impressive debut by Bradley Carrington…even if he got a little carried away at the end there
Hood: I would say he’s a future star, but…
Smith: You’ve got a bit of sense today?
Hood: HE’S ALREADY A STAR!
Smith: Oh, right, I forgot…Weezer wrote a song about him
Hood: Damn straight
Smith: Well folks, there’s no denying the talent Bradley Carrington possesses…his ego, on the other hand, could be an issue. Regardless, I’d say he’s got a bright, albeit interesting future ahead of him. For now, let's head to Angola, Louisiana and catch up with Who'Re and The Knife Man!
~A jeep is bouncing around the shitty Louisiana county roads in Angola. The giant prison is just ahead. We hope whoever is inside the jeep has applied their seatbelts because, otherwise, ouch. Our view is pretty high. The jeep looks like a toy car. It pulls up to the prison and comes to a stop. Our view shifts to the inside of the Louisiana State Penitentiary. A fat warden or official is waiting. His white, buttoned up shirt is soaked with southern sweat. He has a goatee that isn’t near wide enough to cover the corpulent features of his double chin and puffy cheeks. He dabs his forehead, removing the beads of sweat. A couple of guards stand as his side. In walks The Knife Man. The official’s eyes pop~
Prison Official: Good heavens! Why isn’t that prisoner in cuffs? Or, better yet, chains!
Officer: I believe that’s part of the staff. They told us he’d be wearing a mask, black jump suit and, well, carrying a giant knife.
Prison Official: He is one scary individual. What kind of people are we doing business with?
Officer: Don’t worry, I heard the woman accompanying him is rather easy on the eyes.
~At that moment Who’Re appears from behind The Knife Man. She seems to be wearing a very slutty outfit. It becomes apparent very quickly that her shirt was originally a professional one. Yet, due to the bumpy ride…the Knife Man’s knife had slashed a bunch of it away…she is now dressed in practically nothing from the waist up. Her tremendous chest is on full display, held tightly by her lacey bra. She doesn’t seem to really notice or care. She struts alongside The Knife Man. The official is eager to greet Who’Re~
Prison Official: Ma’am, it’s a pleasure to make your acquaintance!
Who’Re: Why thank you, that’s so sweet!
The Knife Man: Hello kind sir. Wonderful establishment you have here. I have much respect for the work you do. Keeping our communities safe. You are a scholar and…
Prison Official: Umm, is there any way…
~He starts to point at the giant blade in The Knife Man’s hand. Who’Re stops him~
Who’Re: Oh don’t worry about that. He’s harmless. Shall we get to discussing the charity event?
Prison Official: Umm, okay…sure.
~He’s still very put off by The Knife Man. They take a seat in a booth near the wall. Who’Re and The Knife Man sit next to one another while the official sits on the other side. He is handed a stack of papers from one of the officers~
Prison Official: As you can see…these papers state that you will hold an event here, at the Louisiana State Pen on Monday, June 19th in honor of ‘Dirty’ Devin McKnight.
The Knife Man: Dear heavens…DIRTY Devin McKnight…this troubles me, deeply. And June 19th, I believe that’s the date Sir Marcus Welsh designated as our impending super show.
Who’Re: Yea but Eastern European told us to get this done. He actually sort of demanded it.
~The Knife Man goes quiet. He doesn’t move for a long time. His mask stares at the prison official. Who’Re is blocking him from leaving the booth. He finally reaches out with his giant knife waving through the air. The prison official leans back and shields his face~
The Knife Man: If you’ll excuse me…I believe I need to make a phone call. I’m terribly sorry for the inconvenience. Who’Re, if you’ll allow me to just CUT through here really quick.
Who’Re: Of course, sweetie!
~The Knife Man SLICES past Who’Re with his knife snaring a bit of her shirt, ripping it away. She doesn’t notice. She sits back down. The prison official eyes her cleavage. She doesn’t notice that either…instead she makes casual conversation~
Who’Re: I really hope Nathan wins tonight…he’s got a huge match.
~The Knife Man removes his cell phone. It’s red…blood red. He uses the point of his knife to dial the Eastern European. We cut to EE’s office. EE answers the call~
Eastern European: This is me saying hello!
~GM Marcus Welsh is near the door handing an artist's rendering for the June 19th super show logo to a man who looks very third worldish. We’re going to guess he’s about to fly out to Eyan, the graphic designer for OCW. EE talks very loudly, in case you hadn’t noticed. Welsh winces and looks back at EE and tries to quiet him down~
Eastern European: Sorry mister Welsh but the man with knife says he needs to be speaking with you?
Marcus Welsh: What the hell is it about? I’m over here finalizing plans for our super show on June 19th…are you saying that a phone call from some replaceable employee is of higher importance?
~EE has that deer in the headlights expression. He puts the phone back to his ear and mouth and asks what the call is about~
Eastern European: He say it about the wish making competition.
Marcus Welsh: Right, like I said, something irrelevant. You handle that shit like I told you to a few weeks ago and, if you find that task too difficult to complete then I’ll go and find some WESTERN European who is more capable.
~This fires the Eastern European up~
Eastern European: I handle it Mister Welsh, you no worry about that! You go and have good talk. Everything o in the kay here!
~Welsh rolls his eyes and exits, shutting the door. We CUT back to The Knife Man who is still standing inside the Louisiana State Penitentiary~
The Knife Man: But sir, that’s the date of our…sir, if you’ll allow me to explain. But sir…sir…SIR…alright, fine.
~The Knife Man lowers his head and hands his cell over to the Prison Official. The Prison Official is slightly perturbed by the amount of scratches on The Knife Man’s phone. But he gets over it and listens to what The Eastern European has to say~
Prison Official: Fax it to you right away? You do realize the signature is binding and this is a state institution so you’d be breaking Louisiana state law if you backed out. Yes, that means that once this is signed you HAVE to adhere to it…otherwise the chances are someone in your organization will face prison time...in this prison, the very prison you promised an event for and did not deliver. Not to mention a disappointed Dirty Devin McKnight. Okay then, I’ll have it faxed right over.
~The phone is handed back to The Knife Man. He tries to speak into it but finds that the call has ended. His shoulders slump. The Prison Official stands and wipes some built up sweat off his brow. He snares the contract~
Prison Official: Looks like we have a deal. As soon as I get these documents back, signed by a person with authority in your organization…OCW will hold a show inside the Louisiana State Penitentiary on June 19th in honor of convicted murderer, rapist, and mattress tag remover…Dirty Devin McKnight.
~The Knife Man proceeds to protest but realizes he has no real authority. The official walks away with the contract as The Knife Man turns to Who’Re~
Who’Re: I’m driving, you’re riding in the back. I don’t have much clothing left.
~The Knife Man nods, very sad that he failed in his mission. We cut back to ringside~
Smith: Uhhh...I don't know how I feel about this
Hood: Me either...I didn't know they made bras that strong, you would have thought a LITTLE of it might have been cut away
Smith: Not that, holding an event INSIDE a prison...one of the most dangeroous prisons in the US
Hood: Dude, it's a CHARITY event. That means we won't be there. Jones or someone even less important than him will do the announcing...that is, if they even HAVE announcing.
Smith: Glad you brought him up...Jones, if you're listening, please try and get word to GM Marcus Welsh about this before those documents are signed. Help us, Jones...you're our only hope!
Hood: I don't know why you're so freaked out...Dirty Devin McKnight could probably use a pick me up...what kind of disease does he have, anyway?
Smith: Lethal Injection disease, I'd assume
Hood: Hmm, never heard of that...I would look it up, but ain't nobody got time for that!
Smith: Hopefully our forgotten colleague, Jones can reach GM Welsh in time...I'd plead to him on air, but we all know he can't be bothered to watch the product on TV. Anyway...we have to move along...so it's time for the debut of Ruby Rose!
Hood: Now here's something I can get behind
Smith: Watch it...
Ruby Rose (0-0) vs. John E. Depth (0-3)
~John E Depth is already in the ring, looking very pornish this evening. He rubs around his oiled, hairy body~
Belvedere: Ladies and Gentlemen this match is scheduled for one fall!! Introducing first, from Hollywood, California…standing 6’2 and weighing in at 230lbs…John E Depth!!!
~"Hello" by Karmin pumps through the speakers as Ruby Rose struts her way out, popping her hip and flipping her hair as she swivels her way into a sideways stance at the top of the stage. She greets the fans with a bright, cheery smile and performs a little dip before skipping her way down to the ring. She interrupts her skip long enough to slap a few outstretched hands on her way. Hustling up the ring steps, she ducks into the ring under the middle rope and repeats her stage pose in the center of the ring~
Belvedere: And his opponent, from Rose, Nebraska…standing 5’1 and weighing in at 110lbs…Ruby Rose!!!
~The bell rings~
Smith: Well it’s the long awaited debut for Ruby Rose. A contracted talent OCW had been in negotiations with for quite some time.
Hood: Well I can see why…she’s smokin’
Smith: She’s already taken, Hood. She’s dating someone on the roster
Hood: Is it Depth? Did OCW put her up against her lover boy?
Smith: No, of course not…why, are you saying she looks like an adult film star?
Hood: Every non-relative chick looks like a potential adult film star to me
Smith: You are a sick, perverse man
~Depth does the ‘frame’ motion with his hands as though his framing, sizing Rose up. He steps forward and gets a closer look. He leans back and nods his head with his aviator shades still covering his odds. He nods and looks out to the crowd with approval. He says, “You’d be perfect for my next movie Spark Butt Plug!”~
Smith: Gross
Hood: Hmm, sounds intriguing…I might have to research it for ideas
Smith: I would NEVER see anything named that
Hood: That’s okay, I’d watch it for the both of us
~Rose is deeply offended. Her mouth drops open as Depth leans in and looks. “Wow, nice real estate in there…could fit a whole lot of meat…” she SMACKS Depth across the face!! He staggers back into a corner. His aviators hang from his left ear and are broken. He reaches up, touching the afflicted portion of his face. His shock begins to devolve into rage~
Smith: You can’t talk to women like that, especially a spark plug like Ruby Rose
Hood: A-Ha so you DO want to see the movie…or at least think it’s a great title
Smith: Dang it…that just came out
Hood: It just slipped out, eh
Smith: I’m gonna shut up
~Depth charges at Ruse in a fit of short sighted rage!! Ruby takes him down with a drop toe hold. He stumbles into the mat. Ruby slides on top of Depth’s back and paintbrushes him in the back of the head, messing up his perfectly combed, gelled hair. She rolls off and kicks back to her feet. Depth stands….his shades are gone and his hair is pointed straight at the ceiling. The fans laugh at his disheveled appearance. He bites his bottom lip and stares angrily at Rose~
Smith: This isn’t looking good for OCW’s favorite adult film director
Hood: Whoa, whoa…when did he beat out Shootah for that title?
Smith: Sorry, I spoke too soon. Forgive me…I forgot that in OCW we have TWO adult film directors
Hood: CLASSIC OCW, BABY!
~Depth runs at Rose yet again…she leaps into the air and dropkicks Depth in the chest. He staggers into the ropes and ricochets off. As he does, Rose leaps into the air and drops him with a Thesz Press. She starts to punch him but hears Depth yell “OHH YEA BABY, NOW WE’RE TALKING!” with her crotch thrust near his face. She gets off immediately and looks down at him in disgust. He rolls over and lays on his side, looking up at her. He blows a kiss~
Smith: What a creep!
Hood: Hey, she’s the one that tried to rape his face with her crotch
Smith: That’s a Thesz Press, Hood
Hood: I don’t care what the young people are calling sex acts these days, Smith.
Smith: It’s a wrestling move!!
~Depth returns to his feet and he reaches out for Rose, she ducks his grasp and runs into the ropes. She leaps off the middle rope and turns in the air. Depth’s back is still facing her…she grabs his head and drops him to the mat with a Bulldog!!! Depth grabs his face in pain while climbing up to all fours and remaining there~
Smith: Great move by Ruby!! She’s got some spunk in her
Hood: She’s got spunk IN her, eh?
Smith: Ah geez…I didn’t mean it that way
Hood: Is it Irish spunk cause, if not, we may have some DRAMA
Smith: She’s got fire, okay?
Hood: Man, those tribes could have really used her on Survivor…seeing as she’s got all this fire and whatnot
~Depth finally reaches his feet. Rose throws a mule kick into his abdomen. He doubles over. She grabs his neck, swings back and forth before rotating over and dropping him with a Swinging Neck Breaker!! Depth flips over onto his back. Ruby thinks about a pin, but bypasses the opportunity~
Smith: Most of his body oil has dried off…I think that’s what she’s waiting on before pinning the nasty man
Hood: Good point…she could slip off before three
Smith: I doubt that
Hood: It’d be like a slip n slide…you ever use those?
Smith: A time or two…great fun!
Hood: Yea, I always liked leaving a small part dry and having one of my retarded friends that I didn’t like slide down it without telling them…it was HILARIOUS
Smith: That sounds very mean and painful…and why on Earth would you spend time with a friend you held such a low opinion of?
Hood: So I could do things like that to them
~Rose positions herself near Depth. He slowly reaches his feet. He staggers around. She jumps up and hooks his head…she swings and drops him, face first into the mat with a Jump Swinging Implant DDT (The Rose Thorn)!!! She rolls Depth over and covers him. Scruff makes the count~
1!
2!
3!!!!
~The bell rings~
Belvedere: Here is your winner…RUBY ROSE!!!!!
Smith: Impressive debut by Ruby Rose!
Hood: Damn, she’s not bad for a flesh colored Smurf
Smith: She’s NOT a smurf
Hood: I don’t know, she’s got the same hair color as the lone female smurf…Smurfbitch or whatever her name was
Smith: SmurfETTE
Hood: Same thing
~Rose exits the ring. She’s extremely happy over her win. The crowd gives her a nice ovation as she waves at them and heads up the ramp. We cut away to Depth who is staring at the lights~
Smith: And another loss for Depth
Hood: Ah well, he’s still collecting a paycheck…
~A few screams sound from off camera. A thud follows. Our camera cuts to the sound. All we see is Ruby laid out on the ramp! Fans are holding their mouths in horror as Scruff rushes up the ramp to check on her. She’s out. CJ flies through the curtain and hustles down, bending next to his significant other~
Smith: What happened?
Hood: She tripped and fell!!
Smith: No she did not!
~CJ sees a giant welt forming on her head as they attempt to revive her to a conscious state. He looks around with distress and anger in his eyes. “Did anybody see who did this?” There is no reply. CJ picks Ruby into his arms and carries her to the back. As he does, he yells at the OCW team, “I want to know who did this by the END of tonight!”~
Smith: CJ is not happy and I don’t blame him…that was a cowardly attack
Hood: You think it was Shootah?
Smith: No, Shootah would have been the one tripping and getting himself injured
Hood: Fucking Shootah, gotta love him
Smith: I guess…well folks, while we try and figure out what just happened and who the culprit was…we’re gonna take you backstage!
~We cut to a shot of the OCW Merchandise booth. Posters, t-shirts, action figures, replica belts, and many other wonderful pieces of merchandise can be seen on offer, including the prominently-featured "CLASSIC OCW BABY!" t-shirt. There's a long line of people waiting to spend their hard-earned money on merchandise. However, after a few moments, we see some disruption in the gathered masses, as if someone is trying to push their way through.~
DR. ORANGE: Move. C'mon, one side. Out of the way. Important business matters coming through. Move. Thank you. THANK you.
~Dr. Jon Orange pushes through to the front of the line. He straightens his coat and adjusts his tie before leaning close to the counter person.~
DR. ORANGE: Gimmie one of them. Keep the bag. Don't forget about my employee discount.
COUNTER PERSON: There's no employee discount.
DR. ORANGE: You mean I have to pay full price for this Chinese sweatshop trash? Those blood sucking, money grubbing- alright, alright, you know what? Fine. I'll take it. Full price. Whatever.
~The counter person nods and hands over the item requested - a replica Chaotic mask. Dr. Orange hands over a couple $20s and immediately starts moving his fingers to demand his change. He gets his change, sighs loudly, and turns to the crowd.
DR. ORANGE: I was only joking about the low quality. Little rib, private joke between me and Clarice here.
COUNTER PERSON: Veronica.
DR. ORANGE: Geez, you never heard of nicknames? Help me out here. Unbelievable. Anyways, folks, don't be alarmed. This is all merchandise of superb quality, designed by fine American artists and worth every penny of your hard earned American dollars. Especially these Max Shade shirts and replica Ascension Championship belts, so nice, you can hardly tell the difference between them and the real one, see?
~Dr. Orange opens up his suit coat. He's got the real Ascension Championship fastened around his waist, and he holds one of the replicas (suspiciously quickly) next to his real-deal one~
DR. ORANGE: See that? Such quality. Buy two so you can keep one in the plastic as a collector's item. Supplies are limited. Thanks for your time. No autographs.
~Dr. Orange then hustles out of the crowd. The camera follows him as he heads towards the backstage area. He glances over his shoulder, grins a little, and holds up the Chaotic mask he has gripped in his doughy fist.~
DR. ORANGE: As you can see, I'm here on my lonesome representing my client, the undefeated Ascension Champion Max Shade. Management decided he needed the week off to prepare for his upcoming Championship defense against Chaotic. Y'know, the fruitcake that wears this tacky thing.
~Dr. Orange holds up the Chaotic replica mask, which is already a little sweaty and wrinkled from being in his gooey hand. Dr. Orange continues walking, although it's becoming increasingly clear that he's walking a little funny.~
DR. ORANGE: I mean, geez, how ugly do you have to be that THIS cluster of corny shapes and colors is considered an improvement, huh? Disgusting. Probably has one of those wispy prepubescent mustaches, maybe a crater face that would make Edward James Olmos look like Paris Hilton. Could even be a bent nose or something. I mean, hey, hey, I'm not judging, obviously if you're busted in the face department, then you gotta get creative, and there's only so creative a guy who calls himself Chaotic can possibly be. Give the yappy flea-brain a break. He's got problems to solve. Face problems. I hear they're the worst.
~Dr. Orange's funny walk becomes more pronounced, as he rounds a corner. He moves swiftly past ring workers and random staff with purpose and determination.~
DR. ORANGE: Anyways, Ol' Bombastic Butterface defeated Robbie Rayder and Assassin for the right to be Max's first sacrificial lamb, and boy what a prestigious honor that is, lemmie tell ya. Chaotic gets to be the only person who will ever challenge Max for his title before Max can officially call himself "the defending champion". Only one. It's not worth much, but it's pretty much the only thing that flying turd is ever gonna get from this match-up, so hey, gotta take what you can get, right?. He certainly isn't getting any breaks this week.
~Dr. Orange makes it to the man's bathroom. He leans on the door for a second to catch his breath.~
DR. ORANGE: Chaotic, let's get to brass tacks, because I got far more important business than you brewing in my south equator. Tonight, you're getting a warmup against someone else that couldn't get the job done against my client, Rebel, and spoiler alert in 3... 2... 1... Your loss to him is going to be exactly the warmup you need for your disappointment next week. It's gonna be a rough two weeks for your obnoxious ass. Settle in. And hey, hey... If by some miracle, you do happen to beat Rebel, then first of all, I better go buy a lotto ticket and a titanium umbrella to block against flying pig-crap, but second of all, don't get too cocky. You're not the guy that's going to break Max's streak. You just aren't. Not gonna happen. There's several reasons for that, but the main one is something I'd like to demonstrate with some visual aids.
~Dr. Orange walks into the bathroom and opens up the handicapped stall - far more roomy. The camera pans down to the toilet paper dispenser, which we can see is completely empty. Dr. Orange smiles his gross smarmy smile at the camera and holds up the Chaotic mask again. He makes a big point of turning it inside out.~
DR. ORANGE: I'm about to make this the most authentic replica ever... Because in a few minutes, this mask is gonna be SO full of shit!
~Dr. Orange winks, then closes the stall door, as the scene fades out.~
Smith: Well, that’s one way to use a replica Chaotic mask
Hood: Probably the most useful Chaotic mask ever!
Smith: I was really hoping YOU KNOW WHO might have followed his client’s lead and taken the week off…sadly, Dr. Orange continues to occupy his Monday evenings here in Key West
Hood: I love the guy. I think if he lost a few pounds, hit the weights, and carried a bunch of weapons around with him that only he could use…he could, you know be alright in the ring
Smith: No, no, no…we do NOT need Dr Orange inside an OCW ring…outside is enough…I’m not even comfortable with him sitting at our announce table
Hood: The highlight of my week!
Smith: Right…well folks, Rebel and Chaotic will square off later this evening. Up next, however, we have two wrestlers looking to get their OCW careers on the right track. Last week Mark Storm emerged victorious in a ‘must win’ against Jake E Dangerously. Meanwhile, Assassin fell in a triple threat to Chaotic. Let’s head down to ringside to see who moves up and who falls down…
Assassin (2-1) vs. Mark Storm (1-1)
Belvedere: Ladies and Gentlemen…the following match is scheduled for one fall!
~”Short Change Hero” by The Heavy begins to play through the speakers and the lights in the arena simultaneously dim down. Smoke begins to rise from the top of the stage and appearing on the screen above are the following words~
~A massive pop ensues as emerging from the back is the self proclaimed "Prince of CHAOS", Mark Storm; who keeps himself composed as he stands at the top of the entrance ramp. He can't help but allow his sadistic signature smirk to appear upon his lips as he closes his eyes and spreads his arms out wide, soaking in the energy that the audience are giving him as they applaud and cheer~
Belvedere: Announcer: From New York, Brooklyn.. weighing in a two hundred and twenty pounds - Your Hero, and Mine.. MARRKKKK STORMMMMMM
~He begins his walk down the entrance ramp, with a leather coat completing his attire as he comes down the entrance ramp.~
This ain't no place for no better man.
This ain't no place for no hero
To call "home."
~At this point, Storm is by the edge of the ring; allowing a smile to embed on his face before he jumps onto the apron and holds onto the ropes, using them to help himself up onto the turnbuckle. He's grinning from ear to ear, soaking in the rest of the cheers coming from the audience, shaking his head sideways as he lowers it, before jumping into the ring~
~Taking off his leather coat, he hands it to the ring announcer before walking over to his designated corner and hoisting himself up onto the second ropes, a smirk upon his lips as he holds his arms up; his theme song slowly diminishing~
Belvedere: And his opponent…
~ The arena lights go out for a moment as we hear a girl's voice scream out “I Hate Everybody” as the opening of “Walking on Bodies” echoes over the PA. After a moment we see Assassin come through the curtain to a chorus of boos from the crowd. Assassin stops midway down the ramp as he cracks a smile looking out at the booing crowd. Assassin continues down the ramp as he reaches the bottom looking at the ring for a brief moment as he looks at the crowd once more before climbing onto the apron and through the ropes. Once in the ring Assassin fakes going towards a corner and instead stands in the middle of the ring turning to his side as he points out towards the crowd and laughs~
Belvedere: From Las Vegas, Nevada…standing 6’3 and weighing in at 285lbs…Assassin!!!
~The bell rings~
Smith: Interesting match here…last week Assassin came up just short in a triple threat for a shot at the Ascension Title…on the same evening Mark Storm snapped a two match losing streak by defeating Jake E Dangerously...
Hood: Sooo…what does that mean?
Smith: Well, like every OCW match…this one has major implications in the intermediate career trajectory of both competitors
Hood: Isn’t that EVERY match, EVER?
Smith: Perhaps…but this one features two intriguing and talented up and comers
Hood: Oh wait is that MARK STORM?
Smith: Why yes it is
Hood: Hold on, weather report coming in!
~Storm and Assassin lock up in the middle of the ring without any theatrics. Both competitors are ready to get into the match and emerge victorious. Assassin secures Storm in a side head lock. Storm tries to fight out but Assassin’s grip is too strong. Storm manages to force Assassin into the ropes and he shoots him off. Assassin sprints across the ring…he hits the other ropes and Storm greets him in the middle of the ring with a dropkick!! Assassin falls to the mat. Storm gets on top of him and throws some stiff right hands at his head~
Smith: Fast start to this match…Mark Storm is looking like the Mark Storm full of potential
Hood: Thunder strikes! Lightning flashes! The wind starts to pick up…a storm is heading our way!
Smith: You do realize we are inside, right?
Hood: And did that save the old woman in Twister who blithely murdered her livestock so that whiney relative Helen Hunt could eat and feed the rest of her white trash posse?
Smith: Wow, we had very different interpretations of that scene
~Storm pops back to his feet and drops a few elbows into Assassin’s chest. After the third elbow Assassin sits up, clutching his chest. Storm kicks him in the back and then throws a kick into Assassin’s chest. Assassin falls back onto the mat. Storm runs into the ropes, leaps on the middle rope and jumps off with a moonsault onto Assassin!! He goes for a pin, Scruff counts~
1!
Kick Out!!
Smith: Nice try, but too early
Hood: Yes, we’re only at an EF2 right now and as we are aware…that can’t do much damage.
Smith: I don’t know enough about tornadoes to confirm that statement
Hood: I mean it would probably blow you away…seeing as you’re the scarecrow and everything
Smith: I am not!
~Storm yanks Assassin to his feet and whips him into a nearby corner. Assassin slams hard. Storm rushes in with a high knee. Assassin ducks and Storm’s momentum takes him over the top rope…he hangs, with his head facing the apron and his legs inside the ring. Assassin grabs him by the waist, hoists him onto his shoulder and plants him in the center of the ring with a Powerslam! Assassin sits up and catches his breath~
Smith: Nice turn around…Storm was on a roll but one wrong move can change everything
Hood: The funnel is ascending…the sky could be clearing
Smith: Should we just trade you for one of those storm chasers? Is that your true passion?
Hood: I’ve told you before…I don’t chase storm. He just finds me. I’m simply being a responsible broadcaster here.
~Assassin is back to his feet. He pulls Storm up and whips him into the ropes. Storm bounces off and Assassin lifts a knee into Storm’s gut!! Storm flips over and lands on the mat. Assassin drops a quick elbow into the sternum of Storm. He returns to his feet and picks Storm up yet again. He whips Storm into a nearby corner, Storm hits hard. Assassin charges in and squashes Storm~
Smith: Early barrage here by Assassin…he’s a big guy but you wouldn’t know it by the way he moves.
Hood: Does he move like Jagger?
Smith: That song was several years ago, Hood
Hood: Shit, really?
Smith: Mhhmmm
Hood: Damn I’m getting old
~Assassin whips Storm across the ring…he smashes into another corner. Assassin charges in a second time, very much like the first. Storm lifts a knee into Assassins’ face!! Assassin stumbles back. Storm hops onto the middle rope and leaps off with a flying clothesline!! Assassin staggers into the ropes…they keep him from falling as Storm regains his footing~
Smith: Redundancy plays right into the hands of Mark Storm
Hood: Did you see the blow back there? Those winds have to be nearing sixty miles per hour!! Storm is picking up!
Smith: I thought we were past this!
Hood: We’re only past this when the Storm passes US!
~Storm lifts Assassin onto his shoulders and drops him to the mat with a Samoan Drop!! The crowd cheers, getting behind Mark Storm. He stomps on Assassin a few times as the big man sits up and drags his ass into the corner. Storm follows him and plants his boot into Assassin’s neck, cutting off his air supply. Assassin tries to forcibly remove Storm’s foot but his arms are no match for Storm’s leg~
Smith: Assassin is in a tough spot…he’d better get out of that corner
Hood: It’s an EF3, Smith and it’s really bearing down on this town. Leaning in there, pushing the town up against the wall…it’s rough.
Smith: Is it now?
Hood: Oh yea, the people out here can barely breathe from all the wind and debris…it’s horrific!
~Storm finally releases the foot after Scruff urges him. He grabs Assassin’s ridiculously thick, curly hair and pulls him to his feet. He whips him into the ropes and runs in the opposite direction. They both bounce off the ropes at the same time and Storm meets Assassin in the middle of the ring with a Spear!!! The crowd cheers with chants of “Storm! Storm!” filling the OCW arena~
Smith: Mark Storm is on a roll
Hood: Yes, the clouds are ROLLING in…it’s getting dark and torrential out here…torrential, that’s the word for heavy rain fall, right?
Smith: Yes
Hood: Alright! We’re at an EF4…it’s nasty, real nasty. I’d hate to be trying to murder someone for money in these conditions. It would not end well!
Smith: Thanks for that ace reporting, Hood
Hood: I do what I can for the people, Smith. For the people.
~Storm pulls Assassin to his feet, he hoists him onto his shoulders, looks out to the crowd, lifts Assassin into the air and drops him across his knee with Dystopia (GTS)!!! Assassin stands upright and falls back like a board. He this the mat and Storm pins him as the fans cheer along with Scruff~
1!
2!
3!!!
~The bell rings~
Belvedere: Here is your winner…MARK STORM!!!!!
Smith: And he does it…Mark Storm with two wins in a row! This could really be the start of something!
Hood: While you’ve got something…I’ve got a whole lot of NOTHING…this town is decimated, destroyed. Rumors are we reached EF5 status before the Storm whisked away.
Smith: Okay, okay...
Hood: NO, it’s not okay! Homes were demolished, cars were wrecked and somebody lost their NINTENDO SWITCH…it’s a fucking TRAGEDY out here.
Smith: Well, while Hood and this fictitious town get their acts together…we’re gonna head backstage with an update on Ruby Rose.
~We cut backstage where Cap Slock has assumed The Knife Man’s shift. Ruby Rose is seated at the edge of a doctor’s chair. She’s got an ice pack applied to a red, swollen portion of her forehead. CJ is pacing back and forth. Cap Slock leans in and inspects her head. He then shines a light inside her ear and asks a question~
Cap Slock: SO DID YOU HAPPEN TO SEE WHO DID THIS?
~Ruby yells and grabs both her ears, dropping the ice pack. Cap Slock calmly picks it up. CJ rushes in and grabs Cap Slock by the collar of his shirt. He looks up at CJ~
Cap Slock: EASY THERE, LET’S ALL CALM DOWN.
Ruby Rose: CJ, it’s okay. That’s just how he is.
~CJ let’s go of Cap Slock. Ruby takes the ice pack from Cap Slock and places it back on the afflicted portion of her skull. She closes her eyes, trying to ease the aching in her head. CJ leans in and asks far quieter than Cap Slock~
CJ O’Donnell: Are you sure you didn’t see who did this?
~Finding it too painful to talk, Ruby shakes her head ‘no’. CJ grits his teeth in frustration. Jones walks in, stressed~
Jones: Is GM Welsh here?
CJ O’Donnell: No…we’re kinda busy so if you don’t mind...
~CJ motions for Jones to leave. Jones closes his eyes and then opens them with a memory rushing to the forefront of his thought process~
Jones: Oh, by the way…an eyewitness came forward and submitted a statement. They saw your attacker.
~Ruby leans forward. Cap Slock tilts his head in Jones direction. CJ reaches out, about to shake it out of OCW’s near invisible employee~
Cap Slock: WELL MAN WHO WAS IT?
Jones: They said it was Josie Barnes
CJ O’Donnell: Whoa, whoa…the eyewitness said Josie did this?
Jones: Yea
CJ O’Donnell: That’s impossible…she’s like my little sister. There’s no way she’d do this to Ruby.
~Ruby looks at CJ, confused. Cap Slock goes back to his task, filling a pill bottle for Ruby~
CJ O’Donnell: Who gave this eyewitness report?
Jones: It was anonymous. That’s all I’ve got, sorry. I really need to find GM Welsh.
~Jones rushes out. CJ looks to Ruby who responds with a disturbed expression. We cut back to ringside~
Smith: Wow…if what we heard is true…this could mean some serious issues in CJ’s personal life.
Hood: Fucking women, man. They are psycho.
Smith: Quite the broad brush there, Hood
Hood: I mean it had to be Josie, right? Who else would even give enough of a shit to lay out Ruby after her debut match? She hasn’t been around long enough to make any enemies?
Smith: I don’t know, Hood. To me, it’s still a mystery. I’m not buying into this Josie Barnes theory until we have proof.
Hood: Good luck getting that.
Smith: The truth always unveils itself…I’m sure we’ll get to the bottom of this eventually. Until then, I’m glad Ruby is apparently okay, aside from a small bump on her head.
Hood: Nothing a bunch of fucking pills can’t take care of!
Smith: Right…well folks, it’s time for our next match this evening as a struggling Chad Vargas takes on a hungry, opportunistic Robbie Rayder. Let’s head down to ringside!
”The Confederate Icon” Chad Vargas (2-3) vs. Robbie ‘Aire’ Rayder (2-2)
Belvedere: Ladies and Gentlemen…the following match is scheduled for one fall!
~ The lights dim as a red siren light circles the arena. 'Indestructible' by Disturbed plays as Robbie Rayder, weighing his ring attire and color matching cape, walks out and kneels down. He points his index fingers to the ceiling then lowers them to point at the ring. Rayder looks out at the crowd as he walks half way down towards the ring, then pulling the cape off from his neck. He slides into the ring, front flips up, drops to a knee and points to the ceiling againt~
Belvedere: Introducing first, from Vancouver, British Columbia…standing 5’9 and weighing in at 195lbs…Robbie ‘Aire’ Rayder!!!
~ The opening chords of Lynyrd Skynyd’s “Needle and the Spoon” controls the sound system as a voice over shouts ‘King Kong ain’t got shit on me!” as “The Confederate Icon” Chad Vargas emerges onto the ramp, his arms raised in the air. He takes a few steps forward as orange, blue, and white pyros blast from behind him. Vargas turns, eyes wide as he smirks reveling in his entrance. He slowly struts down the aisle, mouthing obscenities to the crowd on his way. Once he reaches the ring, he slowly climbs up the steal steps and into the ring. Going to the furthest turnbuckle, he climbs up to the second rung, raises his arms in the air, still mouthing obscenities as he jumps down onto the mat, getting ready to lay down his opponent with his infamous country fried ass whoopin’~
Belvedere: And his opponent…from Everclear County, Tennessee…standing 6’4 and weighing in at 245lbs…he is a former OCW Champion…”The Confederate Icon” Chad Vargas!!!
~The bell rings~
Smith: Chad Vargas needs this win, badly
Hood: What about the little guy
Smith: He isn’t little…Robbie Rayder might be the most muscular person on the OCW roster
Hood: More muscular than Scott Syren? C’mon
Smith: Syren is in a dungeon…or prison…or, well…
Hood: He’s in a WELL? Damnit, which one? I’ll pull him out…or at least send him some snacks via a wooden bucket on a rope
~Rayder extends his hand. Vargas looks at it and slaps Rayder across the face. Rayder’s head jerks to the right, his wet, black hair sticks to his face. He slowly turns around, growing with anger. Vargas yells, “Hit me back you sumbitch!” Rayder lays into Vargas with a forearm!! Vargas is stunned…he staggers back. Rayder kicks Vargas in the calf…then the ribs before spinning and nailing Vargas in the stomach with a mule kick!! Vargas falls through the ropes, landing on the apron. He looks into the ring at Rayder who is poised for attack. Chad’s expression shows that he did not expect that type of strength and explosiveness~
Smith: Chad needs to focus! I know Robbie Rayder doesn’t have the laundry list of accomplishments Vargas owns…but that doesn’t mean he can’t win this match.
Hood: Yes it does. Vargas just wanted to measure Rayder…see how much effort he’s gonna have to put into this one to win.
Smith: And how much would that be?
Hood: More than he was expecting…but no worries, The Confederate Icon will still emerge victorious
Smith: We’ll see about that
~Vargas gets to his feet. Rayder backs up and motions for Vargas to step back into the ring. Vargas smirks and says, “Idiot” as he steps back inside. Once inside he motions for a lock up. Rayder moves forward to engage…Vargas pulls his arms down and knees Rayder in the gut! The fans boo. Rayder doubles over. Vargas plows a forearm through Rayder’s back…Robbie drops to one knee. Vargas whips him into the ropes….Rayder gets to his feet and runs into the ropes, bounces off and ducks a boot from Vargas. He stops on a dime, grabs the head of Vargas and drops him with a reverse neckbreaker! Vargas grabs the back of his neck in pain as Rayder is back to his feet in a flash~
Smith: The quickness and agility is going to be a major problem for The Confederate Icon
Hood: I think he’s too quick…it should be illegal. He should have to slow down.
Smith: Why? It’s one of his strengths…we should marginalize that because YOU don’t like it
Hood: it isn’t JUST me…I’m sure Chad Vargas doesn’t like it either
~Rayder stands poised…Vargas rolls onto all fours. He then gets to a kneeling position. Rayder stands in front of Chad and starts to throw kicks into Chad’s chest. He kicks him again and again and again with each kick landing via a fleshy thud. Chad leans back further and further with each corresponding kick. Rayder stops and delivers a roundhouse kick to the side of Chad’s head! His body goes limp and falls to the mat as the fans start to change “Ray-Der!” Robbie throws his arms into the air while heading to the nearest corner~
Smith: Is he going for Aire Rayde?
Hood: Son of a fuck! This is horrendous
Smith: It’s a little early but…if you’ve got a shot to end it, go for it
Hood: I might have to give up on Chad if this is it
~Rayder hops onto the top turnbuckle. He positions himself and leaps off with the Aire Rayde(Red Arrow)!! Chad gets his knees up!! Rayder’s gut is crushed!! He rolls off Chad and kicks his legs around wildly. He rolls under the bottom rope and falls to the outside. Chad sits up and holds his chest which is growing redder by the second – welts are beginning to form. He breathes in and out, returning a normal level of oxygen into his lungs~
Smith: Robbie was close…but Chad, the veteran and former champion, sensed his chances in this match were in mortal danger and prevented defeat
Hood: Fucking Rayder...he REALLY thought he could beat The Confederate Icon that quickly? Dumbass
Smith: You weren’t so confident a minute ago
Hood: I was pretending, Smith…I was ACTING. You know I’m a great actor.
Smith: I have my suspicions
~Vargas gets to his feet. From behind Rayder climbs onto the apron. Chad senses Rayder behind him and quickly turns around and charges at the ropes. Rayder stands and is met with Chad’s body crashing into the ropes!! Rayder flies off the apron and slams into the barricade!! Fans nearby scream and act all crazy. They must be Vargas fans. Vargas steps through the ropes and hops onto the floor. He approaches the fans and takes their cup, he sniffs it and rolls his eyes. He then pours the contents onto Rayder~
Smith: Well that’s DOUBLE rude
Hood: Double rude, huh?
Smith: Stealing that fan’s drink and pouring it all over Robbie
Hood: You know what’s INFINITY RUDE?
Smith: *sigh* What?
Hood: Offering Chad Vargas a drink without alcohol
~Vargas throws the cup in the fans face. The fan bitches. Chad slaps the shit out of him. He falls back into his seat and starts to cry. He does everything he can to hold it back. Vargas asks, “Are you gonna fucking cry?” The fan yells “NO!” stands up and sprints away. Chad laughs and grabs Rayder by the hair. He drags him near the ring and slams him face first into the apron~
Smith: Another Monday…another potential lawsuit
Hood: Oh please, you ALWAYS say shit like that and nobody ever sues
Smith: How do you know? Are you involved with our legal department?
Hood: I fucked a girl from there once
Smith: EWW
Hood: You must know who I’m talking about!
~Chad grabs Rayder by the back of his neck and trunks and hurls him head first into the steel ring steps. He BANGS into them loudly. Hence the all caps! Scruff leans through the ropes and yells at Vargas. Vargas flips him off. Scruff shrugs and backs away. He begins to count “ONE!” Vargas lifts Rayder up, over his head for a press slam and drops him, chest first across the barricade. Scruff yells “TWO!”~
Smith: We’re seeing the mean streak that resides within The Confederate Icon
Hood: You mean we DIDN’T see it at Like There’s No Tomorrow
Smith: Tonight, we’re seeing it TONIGHT
Hood: Oh okay, thanks for the clarification
Smith: He’s had some tough losses…I think he’s taking those frustrations out on Robbie Rayder
Hood: Yea, probably
~Vargas rolls into the ring, breaking Scruff’s count. He then rolls back out and grabs Rayder by the hair…he slams him face first into the steel steps…he yanks back on Rayder’s head, having never let go, hooks him around the neck and drops him to the floor with a Russian Leg Sweep! Vargas sits up and wipes his hands in an arrogant manner. Scruff yells out “THREE!”~
Smith: Chad is abusing the rules
Hood: Well, like a dumb woman in an abusive relationship…if the rules don’t like it, they can change! Or leave…
Smith: Not every match needs to be lawless, Hood
Hood: And not every match needs rules, Smith!
Smith: Yes, every match needs rules, Hood. I think that’s a pretty basic part of a match’s foundation
Hood: How basic we talking? Like stilt basic or slab basic?
Smith: Slab
Hood: Fuck, yea, that’s really settled in there
~Scruff yells “FIVE!” Vargas rolls in and back out. Scruff slumps his shoulders, sighs and restarts as Vargas goes back to the outside. He pulls Rayder up and whips him into the ring post…Rayder hits hard and sort of collapses into the ring steps, leaning into them. Vargas charges in and kicks Rayder in the face!! Rayder flies over the ring steps, landing on the other side. Vargas removes his leg from atop the steps and looks inside the ring. Scruff yells “FIVE!” Vargas rolls in and back out. Scruff yells “SIX!” Vargas looks shocked and yells at Scruff. Scruff calls out “SEVEN!”~
Smith: Atta boy Scruff! Don’t take that from him!
Hood: This is ALMOST as bad as the women’s liberation movement!
Smith: WHAT?
Hood: Dinner should always be on the table at five pm, no exceptions!
Smith: I hope we’re on a delay and can edit out what you just said
Hood: Oh yea? DELAY THIS!
~Hood goes on a profane tirade about women, we assume. We’re not sure because the delay picks it up and bleeps it out. Vargas jumps over the steps and grabs Rayder by the hair. Scruff yells “NINE!” Vargas tosses Rayder into the ring and rolls in right behind him as Scruff is about to shout ten. Scruff lowers his arms and the match continues. Vargas gets to his feet and bitches at Scruff, cornering him~
Smith: Chad Vargas is getting very much in Scruff’s personal space…very threatening
Hood: He’s on a short fuse, Smith. He’s had a very, very tough 2017
Smith: So has Bob Grenier but you don’t see him acting this way
Hood: How do you know? We haven’t seen him at all tonight…he might be backstage bullying PUFF
Smith: Or Gruff
Hood: Shit, you can’t bully Gruff…that’s one tough mother fucker…he’s GRUFF
~Vargas pokes Scruff in the chest yelling in his face. Scruff has his hands in the air as Vargas is nearly nose to nose with him. He’s saying things like “This is Bullshit! You’re not gonna fuck me over tonight!” He finally shoves Scruff’s face away and turns around to deal with Rayder. As he does he’s nailed in the face with the Sick Kick!!! Vargas falls to the mat, knocked out! The crowd leaps to their feet in part jubilation, part surprise. Rayder staggers around and heads toward a corner~
Smith: Oh my gosh!! The Sick Kick!! Out of nowhere!
Hood: Fucking hell
Smith: Robbie Rayder might do this!
Hood: I picked a hell of a night to quit drinking
~Rayder leaps onto the top turnbuckle and looks down at Vargas. He steadies himself and leaps off with the Aire Rayde!!! It connects!! Rayder hooks both of Chad’s legs as Scruff slides in and happily counts~
1!
2!
3!!!
~The bell rings~
Belvedere: Here is your winner…ROBBIE “AIRE” RAYDER!!!!!
Smith: He did it!! What an upset!
Hood: FUCK
Smith: One week removed from a very tough defeat Robbie Rayder bounces back and pins a former OCW Champion!
Hood: That’s it…Chad should fucking retire. That or take a long vacation…this shit just keeps getting worse
Smith: You act like Robbie is chopped liver!
Hood: Chad’s the one with the fucked liver…I mean, it’s not near as fucked as Mack’s but, still
Smith: Not what I meant. Regardless…huge win for Rayder. It’s amazing what one week can do for a career…last Monday it was looking bleak for team Aire Rayder…but now, he’s hotter than ever
Hood: Hotter than ever? Shit, calm the fuck down. I think he’s got a hot as hell girlfriend named Candice or something
Smith: Again, not what I meant…folks, we’ve just witnessed one of the biggest upsets of 2017…let’s head backstage!
~GM Marcus Welsh is backstage speaking with ‘The Icon’ Shawn Rossdale. He hands him an envelope that looks like the type which usually contains a check. They shake hands and Rossdale leaves. Jones rounds the corner and spots the elusive GM~
Jones: Mr. Welsh!!! Mr. Welsh! One second of your time, please!
~Welsh turns around and rolls his eyes. He snaps his fingers. Plethora rushes over and grabs Jones, blocking him from reaching the GM~
Jones: Mr. Welsh, this is serious! Please, you have GOT to listen to me…something terrible is about to happen…
~Welsh is greeted by the faceless men. The color in Jones’ face runs away. The faceless men listen to Welsh. He then begins walking and they follow with a sense of urgency. Jones looks up at Plethora. His eyes seem to indicate he recognizes something about Plethora. Plethora notices this as well and quickly lets Jones go and heads off. We cut back to ringside~
Smith: Dang it, Mr Welsh…listen to the man!
Hood: It’s Jones, nobody listens to him. I read he once ran for mayor of his house and lost.
Smith: I hope that’s not true
Hood: The fact that you HOPE it’s not true tells everyone all they need to know about Jones
Smith: Moving along…it’s time for our next match as the Oh Shit Contract Holder and current Newcomer of the Month, Damian K’ takes on Iggy Hardy
Hood: FUCK YES! Iggy Hardy, baby! Let’s get to it!
Damian K’ (4-0) vs. Iggy Hardy (4-2)
Belvedere: Ladies and Gentlemen…the following match up is scheduled for one fall!
~ The screech of a guitar’s feedback over an amazing amp shakes the arena. The lights that brightly illuminate everything fade to nothing, submerging the whole crowd in total darkness. Smoke begins to pollute the stage as finally Gary Clark Jr.’s “Numb” begins to play. The heavy guitar instrumentals with the blaring drum is a clear onset to the large cloud of smoke. A single spotlight creates the shadow of Damian K'~
~He steps out of the smoke with a cigarette on his mouth and a pair of shades on. Loosely upon his shoulders is the infamous black and red trench coat that he commonly wears. He takes a long drag of the cigarette before jetting out a line of smoke. It merges in with the congregation behind him. Within the smoke, hands reach out for Damian, trying to grab onto his form. The shadowy appendages associate themselves with the cultist mindset that the First Son has. The man ignores their attempts and begins his way down the ramp~
Belvedere: Introducing at this time, weighing in at a two hundred and forty pounds. Hailing from Silent Hill, he is the First Son, the Godslaying Beast, this is DAMIAN K’!!!!
~Damian makes it halfway down the ramp, allowing the smoke to completely blanket him. The hands that stalked him had reached him, wrapping themselves around his form. He soon comes from the smoke, jacket off. He only stands there in his wrestling attire at the edge of the ramp. He takes a look towards both sides before ditching his cigarette and stomping it out. He enters the ring, sliding under the rope. He sits there for a moment, before getting to his feet~
~He stands center stage, allowing the smoke to circle around him. The spotlight blasts upon him, casting a shadow. Damian simply stands there, foreboding. Eventually, the smoke dissipates and the lights comes back to normal. The First Son takes off his shades, glaring at nothingness. He heads to his corner and begins to stretch. With his back turned to everything, he awaits for the match to begin~
Belvedere: And his opponent…
~”MOTHER FUCKING INTENSITY!!” is shouted throughout the arena. The fans all leap to their feet as a brick wall appears at the top of the entrance ramp. “Top of the World” by Van Halen begins to play. Suddenly IGGY FUCKING HARDY bursts through the brick wall and he sprints to the ring ALREADY INTENSE. He jumps from the floor over the top rope and into the ring…he sprints into the ropes, bounces off and hits the opposite ropes, bouncing off…he does this repeatedly while breathing heavily and staring into the sky~
Belvedere: And his opponent, from Hawk’s Bluff, North Carolina…standing 6’2 and weighing in at 245lbs…Iggy Hardy!!!
~The bell rings~
Smith: These two faced each other briefly at Like There’s No Tomorrow in the Oh Shit match. Damian K’ was one of the few competitors we’ve seen able to stop an intense Iggy Hardy
Hood: Yea, I heard Iggy had the flu so his intensity wasn’t quite up to par that night
Smith: I didn’t hear that
Hood: You need better sources man
~Iggy is still sprinting across the ring. Damian remains calm, watching the unpredictable, roided up specimen. Damian measures Iggy up…he then takes his chance…he charges in and drives a shoulder into Iggy! It stops Iggy from sprinting. But that’s about it. He doesn’t move…Damian doesn’t move either. The two are at a standstill~
Smith: Reminiscent of their interactions at Like There’s No Tomorrow…Damian wouldn’t give an inch to Iggy
Hood: Are you sure that wasn’t Chaotic?
Smith: Positive…Chaotic was the one being thrown twenty feet through the air
Hood: Twenty? More like Twenty-One!
Smith: Like it matters
Hood: You’ve obviously never played Black Jack
~Damian shoves Iggy. Iggy’s eyes grow wide and he yells “DON’T FUCK ON ME!” He extends his arms, “LET’S FUCKING GO!!” Damian reaches up and interlocks his hands with Iggy’s. it’s a test of strength!! The crowd leans forward with anticipation. They are locked and their chests clash as both men looks for an advantage~
Smith: A test of strength…I don’t think we’ve seen this in years!
Hood: Not since Syren fought Brick Wall
Smith: We had a wrestler named Brick Wall?
Hood: No, an actual brick wall…remember he just kinda pushed through it.
Smith: I don’t recall that, no
~The crowd is impressed with Damian’s strength. Iggy is pretty intense but unable to gain leverage. Suddenly, Iggy starts to snort…his body reddens, almost puce. His gone from intense to SUPER INTENSE!! He yells “AHHHH!!” and is able to flip Damian’s wrists back. Damian winces in pain as Iggy forces Damian onto his knees. Iggy’s eyes are wide…his head could explode at any minute…he looks down and yells at Damian while spitting all over the place, “SUCK MY DICK BITCH!” He lifts a knee into Damian’s face!! Damian falls over, holding his face in pain as Iggy has released his grip~
Smith: Damian K’ gave it his best shot…but Iggy Hardy is freakishly strong.
Hood: I don’t know any man not currently imprisoned beneath the OCW Arena who could challenge Iggy in a test of strength.
Smith: Who would win in a test of strength between Syren and Iggy?
Hood: Nobody…we’d all lose. Life as we know it would come to a screeching halt…the planet would explode or implode…or, shit, both!
Smith: I guess we’d better keep Syren locked up then!
~Iggy sprints into the ropes and bounces off…he sprints over Damian’s body, jumping to make sure he doesn’t step on him…he hits the ropes again and bounces off…he jumps over Damian’s body a second time. He stops, looks down and drops an elbow into Damian’s chest! Iggy leaps to his feet and yells!! The crowd breaks into an “IGGY!” chant. He nods along…as he does, his eyes start to lower. His veins disappear…his skin tone returns to a less “he’s about to stroke out” pigmentation. His intensity fades~
Smith: It’s a tough situation for Iggy…he’s at his best in these matches when he is intense…yet the intensity has to be a major health concern
Hood: Losing matches could be a major health concern too ya know
Smith: You think?
Hood: Absolutely, might be the cause of all those suicide dives
Smith: That joke has run its course!
~Iggy’s muscular hand…if that’s even possible…reaches down and grabs Damian’s head. He yanks Damian to his feet and tosses him into the corner. Iggy throws some pedestrian type punches. They have a solid impact but definitely lack in INTENSITY. Damian sulks in the corner. Iggy throws a kick into Damian’s gut before tossing him into the center of the ring with a hip toss~
Smith: A kinder, gentler Iggy Hardy
Hood: This Iggy SUCKS
Smith: Be quiet…maybe the man has found some inner peace
Hood: That or he didn’t get paid last week
~Iggy picks Damian up and kicks him in the gut. He lifts him up and bodyslams him into the mat. Iggy then grabs Damian’s head and applies a simple head lock. He squeezes, applying some pressure. The fans grow bored and irritated. They start to chant “IGGY! IGGY!” He’s almost sedate…the headlock stays on. Their chants die out~
Smith: These fans are seeing a mat technician here and they don’t know how to take that
Hood: I don’t know who this man is but I demand to know what he did with Iggy Hardy!
Smith: I’m starting to get excited! What’s next? Could we see a sleeper hold? Ooohh…maybe we’ll see head scissors or a bear hug!
Hood: Calm the fuck down, weirdo
~Damian starts to power to his feet. He forces Iggy’s hands off, showing tremendous strength. He turns around and throws a punch at Iggy…Iggy blocks it and wraps his arms around Damian’s waist!! He performs and clench and squeeze! It’s a bear hug! The fans groan. Some of them start to boo. Damian winces, only slightly, while looking more surprised than anything~
Smith: Yes! The bear hug!
Hood: In 2017…give me a fucking break. Boo this man, Boo him!!!
Smith: We should PRAISE Iggy…Iggy the technician could go far
Hood: He could FALL far is more like it…he’s not going anywhere but down doing shit like this
Smith: That remains to be seen
~Damian swings down with both arms and breaks Iggy’s bear hug. Iggy staggers back and Damian runs into the ropes, he bounces off and rams a shoulder into Iggy. Iggy falters into a corner. Damian rushes in and lifts several knees into Iggy’s chiseled abs. Iggy starts to bend over but Damian blasts him with a forearm uppercut!! Iggy nearly flies over the ropes to the outside but lands back into the ring. Damian hooks Iggy’s head, lifts him up and drops him into the center of the ring with a vertical suplex. The fans chant for Iggy with a few yelling “GET INTENSE, LET’S GO!!”~
Smith: Damian K’ has taken control of this one
Hood: Yea, that bear hug bullshit worked out real well, didn’t it?
Smith: I’m sure Iggy didn’t have it applied properly
Hood: Oh he did, the move just sucks
Smith: Fine, agree to disagree…but I will say that K’ is looking great tonight and could be nearing a victory over Iggy.
Hood: Iggy needs to get intense!
~Iggy’s body begins to shake. The crowd gets on their feet, getting excited. Iggy powers up…his eyes start to widen. The crowd chants “YES! INTENSITY!” Iggy turns and looks at Damian. Damian runs into the ropes, bounces off and he DRILLS Iggy in the face with a Yakuza Kick!!! Iggy’s body spins around and he falls on the mat, face down. The crowd quiets down as Damian stands over Iggy, looking down with a sense of satisfaction~
Smith: Since Iggy’s debut…this the one man who has been able to handle Iggy’s intensity
Hood: Oh don’t worry, he’ll get MORE intense, just wait
Smith: You think?
Hood: Yep, attacking an intense Iggy Hardy is like trying to put a fire out with gasoline.
Smith: Maybe…but that wasn’t just any kick…Damian K’ calls that Das Boot!
~Iggy starts to shake once more! The crowd gets on their feet and begins to cheer. Iggy does sort of a push up, trying to get to his feet. Damian notices and stands over Iggy. Iggy’s face is looking down at Damian’s feet. He slowly looks up at Damian and yells “INTENSITY!” his arms are shaking, he’s trying to power up. Damian leaps into the air and comes crashing down with a double stomp into the back of Iggy’s head!! Iggy’s body flat lines. The crowd goes quit. Damian stands over Iggy looking down on him~
Smith: Ouch…that might have been it for Iggy
Hood: Fuck…I guess cocaine can only take you so far
Smith: Damian K’ is apparently a vaccination for intensity
Hood: An Anti-Drug!
Smith: Indeed
~Damian grabs Iggy by his mullet. He pulls him to his feet and then lifts him up, over his shoulder. Damian brings Iggy’s head down, facing the mat. He leaps into the air and drives Iggy head first into the mat with a Leaping Tombstone!! The crowd groans upon impact, feeling for Iggy. Damian covers Iggy in a somewhat nonchalant manner. Scruff makes the count~
1!
2!
3!!!!
~The bell rings~
Belvedere: Here is your winner…DAMIAN K’!!!!!
Smith: Wow…we haven’t seen Iggy handled like that since he joined OCW
Hood: No shit, that was impressive
Smith: It’s been nearly a month since Damian burst onto the scene at Like There’s No Tomorrow and I guess some of us had forgotten just how dangerous and talented this man is
Hood: I didn’t forget…I got your back, Damian!
Smith: Right…well he showed tonight that he’s more than just an up and comer…Damian K’ is a major, MAJOR player in OCW
Hood: I’ve been telling you!
Smith: No you have not…geez…as for Iggy, let’s all hope he can find his mojo
Hood: Are you advocating the use of narcotics?
Smith: Not officially…just saying…if that’s the new Iggy, he may need to rethink things
Hood: Openly pushing drugs…CLASSIC OCW, BABY
Smith: Let’s head backstage…
~ The camera fades backstage and you see PerZag getting ready for his upcoming battle against MJ Bell for the OCW Championship. PerZag looks very focused and in a zone as you see “The Distinguished” CJ O’Donnell walking down the long corridor. His mind appears preoccupied as he mulls over a potentially stressful scenario. PerZag suddenly catches his eye...you can see him instantly switch gears from personal to professional~
CJ O’Donnell: Hey PerZag …
~ CJ has a smirk on his face as PerZag turns around. ~
CJ O’Donnell: Good luck tonight.
~ Is CJ being sarcastic or sincere you can't tell by the tone of his voice or his facial expressions. PerZag shakes his head, and rolls his eyes, obviously not in the mood to deal with this specific person. ~
PerZag: What are you doing here?
~ Obviously not caring about the good luck wish from CJ, PerZag is wanting to know what CJ is truly doing here. CJ smirks at PerZag’s question. ~
CJ O’Donnell: Seriously? I work here you know that. Plus I wanted to see my girlfriend Ruby Rose debut tonight. And that Main Event between you and MJ is going to be off the charts. Match of the year candidate if you ask me. So good luck Zag.
~ PerZag uses his right hand to cover both of his eyes, as he slowly shakes his head, rubbing his eyes in the process, trying to determine whether CJ is trying to screw with him, or whether he is being legit. Either way, PerZag really couldn’t care. ~
PerZag: Really. A member of The Aptitude is going to wish me good luck. Is it because MJ is part of that Clientele group?
~ PerZag slowly shakes his head as he turns away to look for his wrestling boots. ~
PerZag: I couldn’t really care for luck. I don’t need luck. Especially from someone who couldn’t even beat Mack O’Connor for the Savage title.
~ CJ nods his head in agreement with what PerZag just said. ~
CJ O’Donnell: You are absolutely right. I didn't beat Mack for the Savage Title. Maybe I underestimated him because he is always seen hitting the bottle but I can admit it when I lost a match fair and square. Mack was the better wrestler on that night.
~ CJ pauses for a moment to clear his thought. ~
CJ O’Donnell: But I am glad you brought up The Clientele because you know they are going to do everything in their power to keep that title around the waist of MJ. You are a smart guy tho I am sure you have someone watching your back. This is your big three year anniversary isn't it here in OCW? I mean think about the celebration you would have if you captured the title tonight. And everyone needs a little luck especially when you are dealing with someone like Treat and Vargas.
~ PerZag turns back around, staring at CJ, before he crosses his arms, and starts chuckling. ~
PerZag: Seriously. You are going to tell me to watch out for The Clientele. Honestly, I am more worried about you and your bandits. I mean, the three of you will do anything to make sure a title of that calibre will end up around your waists. Chad, Treat, I don’t have to worry about them. I already know that. MJ fights on her own terms, I know that. She will refuse assistance, just like I would.
~ PerZag shakes his head again, backing up a bit to go back to his bag to continue to go through his wrestling gear. ~
PerZag: I really don’t know what you are doing, CJ. Your little ‘polite’ act is ridiculous. How can you act like that when you team up with such delinquents? But, it doesn’t matter really, does it. We all know why you are here.
~ PerZag smiles, standing up, and looking straight at CJ. ~
PerZag: You are here to determine how to be Worthy, since your little Distinguished gig is bullshit.
~ CJ chuckles as PerZag isn't buying his act of kindness tonight and it is with good cause as everyone knows The Distinguished always has something up his sleeve. ~
CJ O’Donnell: Really did MJ fight fair when she came back to the OCW and attacked Alice Knight after she won it? Is MJ the same person she was when she was champion in 2014? From what I seen the MJ of old would of never aligned herself with someone like Vargas or Treat. Yeah maybe Mack she would be friends with but not dumb and dumber.
~ PerZag smiles again, shaking his head. ~
PerZag: She teamed up with Ian Bishop. Oh, sorry, TIO. She teamed with him. That’s way, way worse.
CJ O’Donnell: Is it? TIO and MJ were an item when they teamed. And if MJ was a friend to Alice like she said she was why didn't she help her after you dismantled Knight to open Like There’s No Tomorrow? Great friend MJ is huh? PerZag you can deny it all you want but you are driven to win that OCW Title tonight and will do anything in your power to achieve that. You showed me something at LTNT and maybe just maybe you are Aptitude worthy.
PerZag: Honestly, who gives a shit about Alice Knight? She’s gone. I did that. Why? Because it needed to be done. All the owl crap was way too annoying to continue. I did this company a great thing by doing that. The ratings are through the roof without her around. And Aptitude Worthy? Fuck off. I would rather team up with Chaotic and Max Shade then join you guys. Bunch of dickhead crooks.
CJ O’Donnell: See PerZag you are changing and you don't even know yourself. Like who would have thought you the Worthiest of All Time would have the balls to actually take someone out. Impressive and shocking at the same time. Seriously I mean it when I say good luck and do not worry I'll watch your back just in case someone wants to interfere.
PerZag: CJ, I began my career as a part of Operation Zero. On my very first night, I beat up two idiots that were barely ever seen again. The next week I took out someone that has NEVER been seen again. I have had my moments of taking people out in the past. Operation Zero, Power and Worth, I have always known how to take people out. I just do it to those that really and truly deserve. Those that lesser OCW in many different ways. CJ, if anyone interferes in that match, it won’t matter. I am there to win, no matter who interferes. I don’t need anyone to hold my back at all. There is one reason why I am The Worthiest of All, and that is because I can do it on my own. Something that you and your lackeys seem to lack.
~ CJ nods but it seems like he is doing it to just amuse PerZag. ~
CJ O’Donnell: That's all very impressive but everyone needs a little help from time to time. You would be very surprised what we can accomplish on our own but we help each other because we can. I'm gonna be the better person and keep my word because I think you are underestimating MJ like I did to Mack. I think it is your time to have the OCW Title around your waist and I'll make sure it happens.
~ PerZag sighs, giving up, he walks back over to his bag, once again, pulling out his shoes, finally. ~
PerZag: I couldn’t really care what you do, CJ. No matter what happens, I am walking out of this arena the new OCW Champion. It is something that I have deserved for so long, and as you said before, what better way to do it on my three year anniversary in OCW. So, you do whatever you want, I am still going to be champion either way. Whether you plan to attack me or MJ, it doesn’t matter. I will be the Champ.
CJ O’Donnell: Well break a leg than Champ!
~ CJ walks away from PerZag with a smirk from ear to ear as he passes him. PerZag starts undoing his shoe laces as he shakes his head, whilst CJ walks away. ~
PerZag: What a fucking idiot.
~We cut back to ringside~
Smith: CJ seems highly interested in PerZag's career
Hood: I heard he bought twenty acres in PerZag's hometown. If PerZag wins tonight that property will SKYROCKET in value
Smith: Hmm...that or...and stop me if this sounds ridiculous...perhaps it's WRESTLING related
Hood: Hey man, anything is possible
Smith: PerZag winning tonight would be arguably the greatest story in OCW history. His three year anniversary...what a moment. We will find out shortly if he's able to accomplish this great feat...until then...hold on, I'm told we have a very ANGRY Chad Vargas backstage...let's take a look!
Chad Vargas: I said it earlier in the week and I’m saying it again…I’m fucking done with OCW. That’s it, I’m out.
Treat Cassidy: You might want to keep it down, okay? I know you’re upset, but we don’t want to go too far…make a decision that can't be reversed. You might feel differently in a week or two.
Chad Vargas: Nope, fuck this place. FUCK IT.
~Suddenly, the faceless men appear!! They rush from seemingly out of nowhere. They grab Chad. He tries to fight them off but they are too strong. Treat tries to get in the middle but they toss him several feet in the air, he lands in a wall, and winces in pain. They carry Chad to the exit. They exit the arena with him as Welsh is standing near the door with Chad’s ten year contract in his hands~
Marcus Welsh: You’re done with OCW? Did I hear that correctly? Because these ten year deals can be terminated via a verbal acceptance by both parties...
Chad Vargas: Fuck you, Welsh! You’ve screwed me over time after time since I returned. I’m done…I FUCKING QUIT.
Marcus Welsh: Alright then…on behalf of OCW, I accept.
~Welsh lights the contract on fire. It burns to ash. He tosses it into a trash can as the flames continue to grow. He heads for the entrance, removing his key card to unlock the door~
Marcus Welsh: Get him out of here. If he wants to attend OCW shows in the future, he has to buy a ticket like everyone else.
~The faceless men drag Chad away as we cut back to ringside~
Smith: That is depressing
Hood: I’m gonna miss him…guy can get a little radical but he’s one of my all time favorites
Smith: And with that ten year contract terminated…getting back in is going to be very complicated
Hood: It will have to be on Buffet’s terms, I’d imagine
Smith: Ugh, just terrible.
Hood: Yea, I know he’d been losing but I thought the guy was doing okay. But, hey, sometimes you just gotta walk away and try something different
Smith: Indeed…oh well, best of luck to Chad in his future endeavors. Let’s move along as we’ve got the Rebel…a man many people are looking at as a future star in OCW taking on the #1 contender to the OCW Ascension Championship, Chaotic
Hood: Chaotic is also the STAR of OCW Survivor!
Smith: He did make quite the impression. As did Checkers the monkey
Hood: Fuck yes, I’m gonna re-watch last week’s episode when I get home
Smith: Can I join?
Hood: NO
Smith: Oh, okay then…let’s head down to ringside.
Chaotic (3-1) vs. Rebel (5-3)
Belvedere: Ladies and Gentlemen…the following match is scheduled for one fall!
~"Respectful" by CFO$ begins to rumble throughout the building. Chaotic and Juliet Kelly comes out and greet the fans and then Chaotic jumps over the apron and the top rope. Chaotic takes off his jacket and goes on the top rope starting a "Lucha! Lucha!" chant~
Belvedere: Introducing first, from Mexico City, Mexico…standing 5’7 and weighing in at 180lbs…he is the #1 Contender to the OCW Ascension Championship…Chaotic!!!
~ The lights around the arena turn to red as the opening strains of "Slow Me Down" by the Devin Townsend Band play out, the lights flicker red and white. The camera swoops down to the entrance to show the silhouette of a man, his back turned to the camera, with his left hand raised in a fist above his head, the lights all suddenly burst on as a huge explosion rocks the arena. Rebel rotates quickly, pumping his fist at his side as he does, he begins the walk down to the ring, reaching out periodically to shake hands with the fans. He jumps up onto the ring apron and turns quickly, his arms wrapped around the top rope, again he pumps his left fist in the air then hops over the top rope. He walks around the ring, his fist raised, then stops in the middle, a bank of red fireworks sweep across the side of the ring behind him~
Belvedere: And his opponent, from Chicago, Illinois…standing 6’7 and weighing in at 240lbs…Rebel!!!
~The bell rings~
Smith: Chaotic has a big match next week…the biggest in his career…this week, he takes on Rebel.
Hood: So Rebel is chopped liver, eh?
Smith: That’s not what I’m saying…Rebel had a huge win last week and many people within OCW are looking at him as a future main eventer.
Hood: Really? We sign a sponsorship deal with Harley Davidson or something?
Smith: That’s not the reason!
~Chaotic asks Rebel to give him a second. Rebel nods. Chaotic turns toward his corner and acts like he’s tying his shoe. Rebel looks out into the crowd, taking his eye off of Chaotic. Chaotic turns around and sprints at Rebel! Rebel notices just in time and lifts his leg drilling Chaotic with a big boot!!! The back of Chaotic’s head slams into the mat as he rolls onto his side, reaching out with his arms…he’s clearly stunned~
Smith: A tactical strike that, well, failed
Hood: I don’t know how…I don’t know why…I don’t know in which way…but that fucking mask is to blame.
Smith: You are wrong
Hood: I wanna talk about the big boot. Why is it always called the big boot? Like, what if someone with little feet did the move…why couldn’t we call it Little Foot?
Smith: I don’t think that name would get over
Hood: I sure as hell do
~Rebel pulls Chaotic to his feet and grabs him by the neck with both hands. He aggressively tosses Chaotic into the nearest corner and unloads a flurry of lefts and rights. Chaotic slumps down, about to hit the mat before he is nailed with a right haymaker that sends him over the top rope. He lands on the apron, barely hanging at the edge. Rebel runs into the ropes, bounces off and slides into Chaotic, kicking him off the apron and into the barricade~
Smith: Amazing agility possessed by a man of Rebel’s size
Hood: Yea, makes you wonder why he’s always on a bike…if I were that dude, I’d be like Forrest Gump…I’d run everywhere
Smith: Are you calling Rebel mentally challenged?
Hood: Probably not…but, even if I am, look at what Forrest Gump accomplished? I bet he accomplished more in his life than Rebel will
Smith: Don’t sell any member of the OCW roster short, Hood!
~Rebel slides out under the bottom rope and grabs Chaotic by the mask. He slams the side of his head into Rebel’s mask…Chaotic stumbles back into the barricade. Rebel lifts a knee into his gut. Rebel grabs Chaotic by the mask and trunks…he tosses him at the ring…Chaotic half flips with the middle of his back jack knifing against the edge of the apron! He falls to the floor, nearly landing on his head~
Smith: Rebel isn’t toying around with Chaotic…I think the start of this match angered the giant, blonde man
Hood: He’s not blonde, okay? That’s a bleach job
Smith: Well, what should I call him then?
Hood: Aside from Rebel? I don’t have a fucking clue.
~Rebel reaches down to grab Chaotic. Chaotic has rolled onto his stomach with his head under the ring apron. He feels Rebel reaching for his legs. He kicks Rebel away and crawls underneath the ring! Rebel loses his grip and stands upright. He gets to his knees and carefully pulls back the cloth to peer under the ring. He sees nothing. For a moment he considers climbing under there. That is, until he hears Scruff begin to count. He stands up and rolls into the ring~
Smith: I think our ref is so lazy with his counts that most of the wrestlers forget you can be counted out.
Hood: That or Chaotic spotted something really cool under that ring…like a Koala Bear.
Smith: I don’t think so
Hood: OR he got lost wearing that fucking mask...I mean everything has to appear dark to him, right?
Smith: Again, there are eye holes
~Scruff yells “THREE!” The crowd yells along, not wanting to see a count out. Rebel stands in a corner, patiently. Scruff yells “FOUR!” and stomps on the mat. This draws Rebel’s ire. He stands up and approaches Scruff asking him what the deal is. This breaks Scruff’s count~
Smith: A mistake by Rebel
Hood: Yep you never interrupt an idiot while they are counting
Smith: Indeed
~They argue for a few moments before Rebel realizes Chaotic would have been counted out by that point. He backs away and yells “Never mind, count!” Scruff stands, wondering what number he was on. He then yells, “ONE!” Rebel approaches Scruff again arguing that he was on four. Scruff ponders many things while Rebel increases in anger. The crowd rises as Chaotic emerges…he quickly hops onto the apron and then jumps to the top rope. Rebel senses something going on and turns around…he’s met with a missile drop kick!! He falls to the mat as Chaotic gets to his feet and pumps his arms into the air to chants of “Lucha!”~
Smith: Whether you agree with the capabilities of our referee or not…in hindsight, that was a crafty move by Chaotic
Hood: So I guess it’s just safe to assume that Scruff will fuck up the rules when you’re planning an escape or tactical maneuver
Smith: Apparently…he’s done it for years
Hood: We need PUFF out here! Oh wait, he’s probably jacking off while playing the Nintendo Switch
Smith: He can’t afford that on his salary
Hood: Fuck, you’re right…those guys make less than we do
~Rebel starts to return to his feet…he’s partially dazed, partially pissed. Chaotic runs into the ropes, he bounces off and leaps into the air…he hooks Rebel’s head and drops him with a Tornado DDT!! The momentum carries Rebels feet under the bottom rope. Chaotic drags him into the center of the ring and goes for a quick pin~
1!
2!
Kick Out!
Smith: Not quite…Chaotic is going to have to keep chopping away at Rebel
Hood: I think Rebel’s theme song should be Born to be Wild
Smith: Why…aside from the obvious
Hood: Aside from the obvious, I have no idea
~Chaotic hops back to his feet and rushes toward the nearest corner. He quickly ascends to the top rope. He turns his back to Rebel. Rebel reaches his feet…Chaotic leaps off with a moonsault…Rebel catches him and in one, seamless motion drops Chaotic’s shoulder over his knee!! Rebel releases Chaotic who falls to the mat, holding his shoulder. Rebel backs up into the ropes, using them for leverage to remain steady~
Smith: Nice counter by Rebel but he’s still not all there
Hood: He’s never been all there…not since that first bit of bleach infected his brain
Smith: Maybe his hair is naturally that color? You ever stop to think about that?
Hood: No because it’s obviously a bleach job! You, Mr. NSYNC himself, of all people, should be able to spot an obvious bleach job.
~Chaotic returns to his feet and turns around, spotting Rebel. He gets angry and charges at Rebel without really thinking. Rebel ducks and lifts Chaotic into the air…Chaotic lands on his feet atop the apron. Rebel turns around and Chaotic kicks him in the head. Rebel backs up…Chaotic hops onto the top rope and leaps off with a cross body…he nails it, landing on top of Rebel as they fall to the mat. Chaotic returns to his feet and hurries for the nearest corner~
Smith: It could be Shooting Star Press time!
Hood: So much for that Rebel is a future main eventer talk
Smith: Hey, the match isn’t over yet
Hood: He needs to stop worrying about men wearing black and focus more on his opponents
~Chaotic reaches the top…he looks down at Rebel. Rebel is positioned perfectly, on his back, in the center of the ring. Chaotic leaps off with a picturesque shooting star press…Rebel moves!!! Chaotic lands, front first onto the mat. He reacts by getting to his feet and staggering around…Rebel hurries to his feet and grabs Chaotic from behind, he hooks Chaotic, lifts him up and plants him into the mat with a Full Nelson Slam!!~
Smith: What a counter by Rebel…I know I say this all the time, but this guy is scary agile for his size.
Hood: Yea, he’s kinda quick for a guy that sits on his ass riding around on a bike most of the time
Smith: Oh, don’t tell me you’re going to start mocking his lifestyle
Hood: I think Chaotic said it all, really. But, then again, Chaotic wears a fucking mask…so I don’t really know who the clown is in this one
Smith: Neither…both are amazing performers!
Hood: It’d be cool if an actual clown were out here
Smith: That would be ridiculous
~Rebel yanks Chaotic back to his feet and whips him into the corner. Chaotic hits hard. Rebel charges in with a splash! He backs away and allows Chaotic to stumble near him. While staggering toward Rebel, Chaotic turns around…Rebel grabs his head and hooks him for Rebel Yell (Scorpion Death Drop). Chaotic kicks his legs up onto the turnbuckles and flips it into Sliced Bread #2!!! Rebel is laid out with Chaotic sitting next to him. Chaotic falls onto his back with the crowd cheering loudly~
Smith: What a reversal by Chaotic! Say what you want about him…and, after Friday’s episode of Survivor…you could definitely say a lot…but this guy knows how to get it done!
Hood: Yea…every time I think this fucker is beat he seems to rise from the dead.
Smith: If he were to defeat Rebel tonight that would make him arguably OCW’s top young talent
Hood: No…beating Max Shade would do that. Fuck, the guy gets ONE week off and you go and forget about him
Smith: I haven’t forgotten about Max…or his loathsome manager.
~Chaotic rolls onto his side…he reaches all fours before climbing to his feet. Rebel sits up. Chaotic notices Rebel moving and he kicks him in the chest...Rebel grabs his foot! Chaotic tries to pull his foot away. Rebel rises, holding onto Chaotic’s foot. Chaotic throws and inziguri…it connects!! Rebel lets go and twirls around. Chaotic jumps onto his shoulders…Rebel stabilizes and grabs hold of his legs. Chaotic waves his arms around, trying to get free~
Smith: What’s going to happen here?
Hood: Well, why don’t you watch and find out?
Smith: Could be an electric chair!
Hood: I bet you’re insufferable during movies
~Chaotic rakes Rebel’s eyes. He shifts around with his crotch in Rebel’s face. He pulls downward for a huricanrana…Rebel hangs on and hooks Chaotic’s legs under his arms. He starts to spin Chaotic around the ring. Chaotic tries to stop the momentum. He manages to grab onto the ropes with one hand…then the other. The two are suddenly at a standstill. Rebel tries to pull Chaotic away but Chaotic won’t let go~
Smith: That Chaotic…he is so resilient!
Hood: He’s a fucking pest!
Smith: Don’t call him that, I find his resiliency infectious
Hood: Diseases are infectious, you know
~Rebel tosses Chaotic over. Chaotic flips over the top rope and lands on his feet. He leaps into the air and propels off the top rope. He throws a knee at Rebel. Rebel ducks it. Chaotic lands awkwardly on the mat and bends over to grab his tweaked knee. Rebel leans into the ropes, bounces off and jumps into the air…he places his leg behind Chaotic’s head and drives him into the mat with Rabble Rouse (Fameasser)!!! The crowd leaps to their feet with “Rebel!” chants. A few go “Vroom! Vroom!” while mimicking the act of revving up a motorcycle with their hands. Rebel heads toward the nearest corner~
Smith: Chaotic got caught…he needs to bounce back
Hood: Vroom Vroom!
Smith: Of course that’d be a chant you’d pick up on
Hood: I like it…simple, easy…gives me an excuse to ‘accidentally’ spit on you. VROOM!
Smith: Eww, stop it!
~Rebel hits the top and looks down at Chaotic. He leaps off with Revolution!! Chaotic tries to sit up but is too late…Rebel lands right on top of him!! He hooks both legs as Scruff slides in for the count~
1!
2!
3!!!!
~The bell rings~
Belvedere: Here is your winner…REBEL!!!!!
Smith: He did it! Rebel did it!!
Hood: VROOM VROOM!!!!
Smith: Stop it, please! I don’t have any tissues!
Hood: VRRRROOOMMM
Smith: Ahh, my glasses were just cleaned!
~Rebel gets to his feet and staggers near the ropes, reveling in the win. Chaotic remains on his back, breathing deep, catching his breath~
Smith: That’s two in a row for Rebel…he hit a rough stretch but appears to be back on the rise. OCW officials expect great things from this man and I can see why!
Hood: VAROOOM!
Smith: You’re such a child…let’s head backstage!
~We cut backstage where Welsh is heading back for his office. He steps inside and the final page of a document is running through a fax machine~
Marcus Welsh: Fax machine, huh? Haha, you eastern European people crack me up.
Eastern European: It no my idea. I put the blame on heads of Louisiana people. They less advance than my home country!
Marcus Welsh: What the hell are you doing faxing shit to Louisiana?
Eastern European: Wish of making competition!
Marcus Welsh: Oh, wow, you had to go that far to find someone?
Eastern European: Yes, but he worth it. Doctors say he going to die in month or two.
Marcus Welsh: Wow, yea, this should get us a ton of good publicity if that’s true. Maybe you finally did something worthwhile…if this turns out to be a success I might give you more responsibility.
Eastern European: Oh it will, Mister Welsh…It will!!!
Marcus Welsh: Alright, calm down. Just remember, don’t book any major names for this thing…we need them to stay in Key West. Send, I don’t know, maybe that Jake E Dangerously guy down there or Jack Puffer…you know, some of the lightweights.
Eastern European: Yes sir!
Marcus Welsh: Oh and a bunch of that Make a Wish stuff that we’re going to hang around for the event arrived. You might want to put it away before Scruff or one of the other weirdos working back here takes it home.
Eastern European: I be on it in the instant!
~Welsh looks around, annoyed. Barry Man is Low grabs the contract from the fax machine~
Marcus Welsh: That means, you know, now…I’ve got meetings to take care of.
~EE and Barry Man is Low exit leaving Welsh alone. We cut back to ringside~
Smith: Oh no
Hood: What? Did we just re-sign Bifford?
Smith: WORSE
Hood: TGO?
Smith: NO! It appears as though we are now contractually obligated to hold an event inside the Louisiana State Pen on June 19th in honor of Dirty Devin McKnight!
Hood: CHARITY, Smith. Relax, this isn't going to affect us at all
Smith: I...hope you're right. I need something to take my mind off of this madness...how about the Savage #1 Contenders Match?
Hood: I'm down like a clown James Brown!
Smith: Down to ringside we go!
Savage #1 Contenders Match
”The Marvel” Matt Meyhu (4-0) vs. Nathan Dravers (5-3)
Belvedere: Ladies and Gentlemen…the following match will be conducted under Savage Rules…and it is scheduled for one fall…the winner will receive a shot at the OCW Savage Championship in two weeks…
~ Circus For A Psycho plays to amped - up cheers and Nathan emerges from the curtain amping up the crowd further. Jonathan is behind him. He sings along to his theme, slapping the hands of fans along the way. Leaps into the ring, onto the turnbuckle singing his theme and smiling cocky, but friendly as he's a face. Jonathan remains on the outside~
Belvedere: Introducing first, from Denver, Colorado…standing 6’0 tall and weighing in at 200lbs…Nathan Dravers!!!
~ “LA… LA, LA LA… Wait Till I Get My Money Right…” “Can’t Tell Me Nothing” by Kanye West hits as the lights dim. Green lights flicker throughout the arena as Matt Meyhu walks slowly out onto the ramp with the OCW Tag Championship over his shoulder. Matt poses for the fans with a smirk on his face, receiving a chorus of boos. He walks down the ramp, ignoring fans who reach out to him, until he reaches the ring apron. He hops up onto it and grabs the top rope before vaulting over into the ring. Matt lands and hops up and down a few times before making his way over to his corner. He climbs up onto the middle turnbuckle and poses once more for the fans, receiving the same reaction again. He laughs as he hops down and takes his place in the corner~
Belvedere: And his opponent, from Chicago, Illinois…standing 6’5 and weighing in at 240lbs…he is one half of the OCW Tag Team Champions…”The Marvel” Matt Meyhu!!!
~The bell rings~
Smith: Huge match, Hood. Two wrestlers who are new to OCW in the year 2017…both looking to earn a crack at one of OCW’s top championships, the Savage Title.
Hood: I still can’t believe that kid with THAT hair defeated Bob Grenier
Smith: Get used to it…the Dravers are here to stay and are improving each week…I wouldn’t be shocked if Nathan upended Meyhu tonight.
Hood: If that happens…I might perform a suicide dive
~Meyhu walks up to Nathan, shoving Scruff aside. His right hand grips the strap of his tag belt as it drags across the mat. Nathan musters up his bravado and paces toward Meyhu. They meet in the middle of the ring. Meyhu lifts the tag belt up and shoves it in Nathan’s face saying “Hey, remember this? Huh? Do ya?” Nathan shoves it out of his face, angrily. Meyhu laughs. Scruff reaches to take the belt from Meyhu~
Smith: That’s totally unnecessary! How about a little class, huh?
Hood: School’s out, brother, haven’t you heard? It’s all about the Aptitude and the entire roster has failed the course.
Smith: If he’s so big and tough why does he have to mock Nathan? Seems like he’s scared to me
Hood: Nathan Dravers could have a gun in his hand and he’d still be at a disadvantage
~Meyhu hands the title to Scruff. He pulls it back and DRILLS Nathan in the head with it!! Nathan falls to the mat, holding his forehead in pain. Meyhu laughs and hands the title over to Scruff…who rushes to the ropes and gives it to Belvedere. Jonathan, on the outside slaps the mat and yells inside the ring. Meyhu starts to methodically stomp on Nathan~
Smith: Big tough guy…yea, real tough. Blindsiding your opponent when he isn’t looking
Hood: What are you talking about? Nathan had a knife in his hand, didn’t you see it? I think The Knife Man smuggled it to him backstage
Smith: Preposterous! First off, The Knife Man is in Angola. Second…it would have to have been an invisible knife because I didn’t see anything
Hood: An invisible knife? That’s even more miraculous that Meyhu was able to spot it in time! He truly is the greatest!
~Meyhu continues to take his time, stomping on Nathan’s head whenever he starts to improve his position. The crowd boos finding his behavior loathsome and the match kind of boring. He leans toward the ropes as though he’s listening to the crowd. They respond by going, “BOOOOO”. He nods and says, “Okay, okay.” He steps back. Nathan gets to his hands and knees…the closest he’s come to reaching his feet thus far. Meyhu charges in and kicks him right in the face!! Nathan flips onto his back near the ropes, staring blankly at the ceiling. More boos invade the ring~
Smith: Nathan never had a chance! We need a mulligan!
Hood: I know we’re fresh off the Masters but could you refrain from using golf language…it’s totally gay
Smith: Sorry, it just slipped in there.
Hood: Wow…phrasing, Smith…PHRASING
~Meyhu places his foot in Nathan’s throat and applies pressure while grabbing onto the top rope for leverage. Nathan kicks his feet and grabs Meyhu’s foot with both hands…but is unable to remove it. The crowd finally cheers. Jonathan slides into the ring and rushes up behind Meyhu. He knees Meyhu in the kidney. Meyhu grabs the side of his back and turns around…Jonathan drills him in the face with a superkick!! Meyhu goes over the top rope and falls to the outside floor! The crowd is on their feet chanting “DRAVERS! DRAVERS!” as Jonathan helps Nathan to a seated position and pats him on the back before exiting the ring~
Smith: Thank goodness! Brothers always have each other’s back!
Hood: Oh you’re okay with that shit, huh? Blatant cheating
Smith: It’s a Savage Rules match, Hood. Anything goes
Hood: So, murder is okay?
Smith: Anything within the Florida law, I’d imagine
Hood: Is that hair color legal…because, if not, I’m totally reporting them. Somebody get me a law book!
~Nathan gets to his feet and staggers around. His head is still swishing from the shot he received at the start. He finds the ropes and looks down…Meyhu is on his feet stretching his leg. Nathan grabs the top rope, works up some momentum and leaps over and onto Meyhu with a plancha!! Meyhu falls to the floor with Nathen on top! Nathan is quick to his feet and he starts to pose. Jonathan yells from across the ring, “Stay on him!” Nathan looks down and Meyhu is already getting back to his feet. Nathan delivers a knee into Meyhu’s jaw! He falls back against the barricade, dazed~
Smith: You cannot give a wrestler the caliber of Matt Meyhu a second of rest
Hood: That seems kind of harsh…surely you can give him a second
Smith: No, not one second…not if you want to win. After all, he wouldn’t return the favor
Hood: Are you kidding me? I think there was at least one second in between each of those boots he placed into Nathan’s face. I guess that makes Meyhu a real humanitarian
Smith: I don’t think so, Hood
~Dravers backs up against the ring apron…creating as much space between himself and Meyhu as possible. He sprints forward and leaps into the air, driving both knees into Meyhu’s face!! Meyhu slouches over. Nathan walks over toward Belvedere and snares the OCW Tag Title. Jonathan looks concerned. He rushes over and talks with Nathan~
Smith: I don’t think Jonathan wants Nathan to use that belt
Hood: Why the fuck not? This is NO DQ…for fucks sake
Smith: He wants him to win it the right way
Hood: THAT is the right way…NO DQ…drill him with the belt! You see, this is why the Dravers with the pink hair is facing Matt Meyhu and the Dravers with..that red kinda hair is cheering him on and fucking a skanky waitress.
Smith: What about Who’Re?
Hood: Hey, at least she’s on TV
~Jonathan puts his hands on the belt and tries to take it away from Nathan. Nathan retains a firm grip, refusing to relinquish the weapon. From behind Matt Meyhu smashes Nathan in the back of the head with a forearm!! He runs into Jonathan…the Dravers Boys crash into the barricade! Nathan drops the belt…Meyhu picks it up and checks his reflection out in the gold~
Smith: Like I said…you cannot take your eye off of Matt Meyhu
Hood: Nobody can…including Matt Meyhu!
Smith: That’s not what I meant
Hood: How does a person look via a gold reflection?
Smith: I’m not egotistical enough to know the answer to that one
~Meyhu kicks Nathan aside and goes after Jonathan. He kicks Jonathan in the chest and lifts him up, leaning him against the barricade. He shows Jonathan the title and then smashes it, repeatedly into Jonathan’s face. He hits him again and again and again until Jonathan falls to the mat with a busted nose. Meyhu looks at his belt and sees a red stain…he wipes it off on Jonathan’s clothes before turning his attention to Nathan. Nathan is crawling away~
Smith: Turning the other cheek can sometimes be painful
Hood: What terrible advice to give a wrestler…”Hey, what should I do if this guy punches me?” “Turn the other cheek, of course.”
Smith: You’re missing the metaphor
Hood: “And, what should I do when my wrestling career ends during my first match while turning that other cheek?” “Farm? How the hell should I know, kid”
Smith: You like talking to yourself?
Hood: Better company than the idiot sitting next to me
~Meyhu holds his belt with one hand and grabs Nathan’s left foot with his other. Nathan hops up with his back to Meyhu. He jumps off his free leg and spins around, kicking Meyhu in the chest! Meyhu staggers back, releasing Nathan. Nathan gets back to his feet quickly and he charges at Meyhu, leaping through the air with a flying forearm!! The shot takes Meyhu down and fees the tag belt from his grip. Nathan picks it up and looks at it…the fans chant “USE IT!”~
Smith: I think we can all guess where this is going
Hood: These fucking fans should be ashamed of themselves.
Smith: Oh come on, Meyhu was going to beat Nathan with the belt just like he did his brother, Jonathan.
Hood: Uhh, no, he was trying to help Nathan to his feet. Matt Meyhu is a great man.
~Nathan waits for Meyhu to regain his footing. He hits him in the side of the head with the title! Meyhu staggers to his right, but remains standing. Nathan hits him again…this time Meyhu staggers into the barricade, it keeps him upright. Nathan takes a few steps back and charges forward…he swings upward with the title, smacking Meyhu in the jaw!! Meyhu’s body tips over the barricade and lands in the crowd! Nathan raises the title high in the air as the crowd cheers~
Smith: A little quid pro quo!
Hood: I don’t know what that means
Smith: Tit for tat
Hood: I don’t see any tattoos…and I damn sure don’t see any titties
~Nathan climbs up atop the barricade and looks down at Meyhu. Amazingly the Aptitude member is already back on his feet. He isn’t busted open. His head is red with irritation and starting to swell, slightly. Nathan leaps off and smashes the title into Meyhu’s forehead in a Double Axe Handle type of motion. Meyhu collapses backward. Fans scatter allowing his body to slam into the concrete floor without any resistance~
Smith: Nathan’s all grown up now!
Hood: I certainly hope so, for the whore’s sake
Smith: Why’s that?
Hood: Because you know she’s dragged him kicking and screaming AT LEAST to third base…if he weren’t grown up, that’d be a felony!
Smith: Dragged him, really?
Hood: Of course, he probably still thinks girls are icky.
~Nathan holds the title in his hands and looks down at it. He spots a fan wearing a dirty, Classic OCW, Baby t-shirt. He hands him the title…the fan yells with glee and runs off with the belt in tow. Nathan grabs Meyhu by his hair and drags him back over to the barricade. He hurls Meyhu over the barricade and then hops atop it himself. He jumps off with a splash on to Meyhu!~
Smith: And some lucky fan with a tremendous souvenir!
Hood: That’s ALL you have to say? That’s fucking THEFT man
Smith: Some might say The Aptitude came in here and STOLE those belts from The Dravers Boys
Hood: What? Are you fucking retarded? It’s not the same thing AT ALL
~Dravers pulls Meyhu to his feet and positions him facing the ring. He springs forward with a superkick into Meyhu’s chin!! Meyhu’s body snaps back and onto the apron…the momentum sends him rolling under the bottom rope. Nathan jumps onto the apron and kicks Meyhu closer to the center of the ring…he then leaps over the top rope with a senton! He nails it perfectly and goes for a pin on Meyhu~
1!
2!
Kick Out!!
Smith: Close!! That was a lot of damage and it nearly defeated The Marvel
Hood: Yea well random Dravers Boy better pin Meyhu before he finds out he GAVE his title away
Smith: Think there will be hell to pay?
Hood: SEVENTH CIRCLE HELL TO PAY
~Nathan pulls Meyhu to his feet, undaunted by the kick out. He hooks Meyhu’s arms, looking for the Dravers Drop! Meyhu powers up!! He lifts Nathan into the air and charges for the corner. Nathan tries to slip away but Meyhu brings him crashing down into the turnbuckles!!! Nathan slouches down as Meyhu staggers away, falling to one knee…still feeling the impact from Nathan’s attack~
Smith: Nathan can’t slouch…he can’t rest…he’s got to get back after Meyhu
Hood: Ah shit
Smith: What?
Hood: I agree with you
Smith: That’s not so bad
Hood: It’s fucking tragic
~Nathan recovers and hops onto the middle rope. Meyhu turns around…Nathan leaps off with a knee into Meyhu’s face!! The momentum sends Meyhu crashing onto his side. Nathan hustles for Meyhu’s arm and locks in a Kimura!!! Meyhu winces in pain and runs his free hand through his hair. Nathan has is locked in…Meyhu’s arm looks as though it’s close to breaking~
Smith: Ode to Alex!! Could we…could we see The Marvel tap out?
Hood: He won’t fucking tap out…but his arm could break and, if that happens, Nathan Dravers should be FIRED
Smith: Seriously?
Hood: You’re right…not harsh enough…he should be tossed into the OCW dungeon!
~The crowd really gets behind Nathan. They sense a potential tap out coming. Meyhu lifts his arm up high…the fans lean toward the edge of their seats~
Smith: He’s gonna tap!
Hood: NO!!!
~Meyhu reels in all four fingers with just his thumb extended. He then jams that thumb RIGHT into Nathan’s eye!! Nathan yells out and releases the hold instantly!! Meyhu rolls over and sits up, he clutches at his left arm, keeping it in close while Nathan rolls around, holding his afflicted eye socket~
Smith: Cheap!
Hood: Hey, it worked
Smith: That could seriously injure someone
Hood: Not really, Lance Savage seems to be doing okay…ya know, for a deformed crippled freak
~Nathan gets to his feet and stumbles around. Meyhu pops to his feet, keeping his left arm tight and restricted. Nathan stumbles toward Meyhu and eats a superkick!! He falls to the mat. The fans groan knowing this is the set up to The Ego Trip! Meyhu reaches down for Meyhu when something catches his eye. He looks out and sees a bunch of fans wearing Mack O’Connor shirts taking photos with his OCW Tag Title. He flies through the ring and hops the barricade~
Smith: Uh oh
Hood: Mack O’Connor fans have no respect
Smith: I think that’s the first gathering of Mack O’Connor fans I’ve ever seen
Hood: Kind of like stumbling upon a herd of white tigers?
Smith: Perhaps
~Meyhu reaches the fans and he rips his title belt away. He then starts to beat down the fans with his belt. The few that don’t suffer any shots run off screaming. Once he’s finished…he looks around at the other fans with his belt ready to be used as a weapon…they all hold their hands up and say things like “Meyhu rules!” “The Marvel all the way!” He nods and then hustles back toward the barricade, leaping over it with fluid grace~
Smith: Might have a few lawsuits stemming from that altercation
Hood: Yep, and Matt Meyhu has every right to sue those fans for stealing his property
Smith: I was talking about the fans suing Meyhu for physical harm
Hood: He was teaching them a lesson in human decency. You don’t steal other people’s shit and you don’t buy Mack O’Connor t shirts
~Meyhu tosses the title at Belvedere. Belvedere makes a spectacular catch. The man is versatile. Meyhu slides into the ring. Nathan is in a corner, hunched over. Meyhu drives a knee into his ribs and drags him into the center of the ring. He hooks him for the Ego Trip…he’s standing near the ropes…Jonathan reaches in and corrals Meyhu’s feet. Meyhu tries to kick him off…in doing so, Nathan breaks free and steps back…he superkicks Meyhu in the face!! He knees Meyhu in the gut…Jonathan lets go and Nathan hooks both of Meyhu’s arms and drops him in the center of the ring with The Dravers Drop (High Impact Double Arm DDT)!!!! Meyhu flips onto his back as Nathan makes the cover…Jonathan points into the crowd with each slap of Scruff’s hand~
1!
2!
KICK OUT!!
Smith: No!
Hood: Haha, yes! You can’t pin The Marvel!
Smith: I’m sure he’s been pinned before
Hood: Not in OCW…and not by a Dravers
Smith: Nathan’s gotta stay on the offensive…he can’t let that discourage him…he’s close…c’mon, Nathan!
~Meyhu sits up, breathing heavily. Nathan’s hands run through his pink hair as he can’t believe Meyhu kicked out again. He gets to his feet and shakes his head, looking dejected. Jonathan yells at him to stay focused. Nathan looks outside the ring at his brother…his nose is busted, blood is staining the bottom portion of his face. The scene inspires Nathan. He grabs Meyhu by the hair and jerks him to his feet. He elbows Meyhu in the face and runs into the ropes…he leaps off and goes for a Lou Thesz Press…Meyhu catches him and drills him with a Spinebuster!!! Nathan is flattened as the fans start to boo…Jonathan buries his face into the apron~
Smith: High impact spinebuster by The Marvel…this isn’t looking good
Hood: Fucking selfish Dravers…wiping his bloody face all over our apron BEFORE the OCW Title match
Smith: That’s probably the furthest thing from his mind
Hood: Really? So you think cyan colored panda bears eating papaya flavored gelato is closer to his mind than that?
Smith: Uhh…I…I don’t know
~Meyhu gets to his feet…he’s wincing, he’s in some pain…he’s taken a solid beating. He pulls Nathan up and hooks him for The Ego Trip. Jonathan slides into the ring. The fans go wild. Meyhu’s back is to the other Dravers. Jonathan steps into a superkick…drilling Meyhu in the back of the head!! Nathan is released…he punches Meyhu…Meyhu falls to his knees. The Dravers look at one another and nod their heads, hurrying into opposite corners. The crowd rises~
Smith: Here we go…Matt Meyhu could be SEEING DOUBLE
Hood: Son of a bitch! Where the fuck is CJ or TIO? This is UNFAIR
Smith: Hey, you play the numbers game and sometimes it plays you back
Hood: What the fuck does that mean? That is one of the gayest things you’ve ever said
Smith: Leave me alone
~The Dravers lock eyes and spring forward. They throw their double superkick…Meyhu tumbles forward, rolling out of the way! Jonathan NEARLY kicks Nathan…but he stops. They pause for a moment with Nathan looking at Jonathan almost suspiciously. Jonathan looks back like “C’mon.” Suddenly, both Brothers are grabbed by the throat. Meyhu lifts them up and drills them into the mat with a double chokeslam!!! He kicks Jonathan out of the ring and yanks Nathan to his feet using his pink hair. He hooks him and drops him straight to the mat with The Ego Trip!!! Meyhu flips Nathan over and pins him~
1!
2!
3!!!!
~The bell rings…the crowd boos~
Belvedere: Here is your winner…and the #1 Contender for the OCW Savage Championship….”THE MARVEL” MATT MEYHU!!!!!
Smith: I’m SICK
Hood: Well scoot away from me, I don’t want to catch your fucking disease
Smith: Not like that…I’m just gutted…Nathan was so close
Hood: Be gutted all you want…I’m filled with joy!!! Matt Meyhu is the #1 contender for Mack O’Connor’s belt
Smith: This is terrible
Hood: That belt is COMING HOME to The Aptitude
Smith: Let’s hope Mack can do to Meyhu what he did to CJ O’Donnell…we’ll find out in two weeks.
~Meyhu exits the ring, showing glimpses of pain. He snares his Tag Title and makes his way for the ramp. He reaches the top and looks at the Dravers Boys who are in the ring, sullen. Jonathan leans over Nathan who is still recovering. Meyhu holds his Tag Title high in the air, showing it off to the Dravers one last time before exiting through the curtain~
Smith: What a jerk
Hood: What a man we can all be proud of!!
Smith: I will never be proud of someone like that…ever.
Hood: Yea and you also eat at McDonalds
Smith: HOW DARE YOU
Hood: Two all-beef patties special sauce lettuce cheese pickles and onions on a sesame seed bun!
Smith: Let’s head backstage
~We cut backstage to see OCW Paradigm Champion The Incredible One walking backstage looking around for something, or someone, as the crowd immediately boo’s his presence. He has the title around his waist and he keeps looking at doors until he comes across one that says “Massacre GM - Marcus Welsh”. More jeers form as TIO gives a knock before making his way into the office. Welsh is sitting down on his desk rummaging through papers until he sees TIO, and focuses his attention on him~
TIO: Marcus Welsh, my favorite general manager. How are you today? Didn’t Massacre begin GREAT - Chad Vargas is no longer working here - I LOVE IT. Fantastic work.
Marcus Welsh: Yea, well that opinion is no surprise. Listen, I didn’t call you in here to glad hand or pat each other on the back - even IF you’ve been incredible thus far. I’m afraid I’ve got some work related news.
TIO: What do you mean… if? I HAVE been incredible! I have beaten Vargas two times, have defended this lovely title more times than ANY current champion - I am the longest current reigning OCW champion and with Vargas gone… the Clientele is basically no more. I did you proud, Mr. Welsh. You despised the fact that these, hooligans, tried to force your hand with old contracts and so far I’ve been setting them straight.
Marcus Welsh: That you have and I’ve held up my end of the bargain pretty admirably. I’ve done what I could to keep you fresh and make sure that you remain the main attraction your resume leads people to believe. However, that Paradigm Championship - it needs to be defended every so often so I’ve got May 1st circled on my calendar.
~TIO’s cheerful expression fades as he cocks an eyebrow and paces closer to Welsh’s desk. He starts to fiddle with things on his desk, to his displeasure, before turning his attention back to the general manager~
TIO: Look… can I call you Marcus? I feel like we’ve got a good enough relationship that I can call you Marcus and you can call me… well… just incredible. So, here’s the thing, I promised you ratings, a sold out OCW Arena every single week, among others things, and I have delivered. I thought we agreed that this was going to be… easy, for me. I feel like having beaten Vargas twice, and Rebel once, I’ve proven that I don’t need to defend this title. Who around can legitimately claim they’re ready to face me, eh? I don’t see anyone.
~Welsh stands up and rubs the side of his neck in an irritating motion. He thinks for a moment while approaching TIO. TIO is a good 2-3 inches taller than Welsh and quite a bit thicker. Welsh pats him on the bicep~
Marcus Welsh: You and I both know there isn’t anyone on this roster capable of defeating you - outside of the aptitude members and maybe a man rotting in the OCW dungeon. But titles have to be defended so, tell you what. How about YOU pick your next opponent for that May 1st title defense? And, after that, smooth sailing until June 19th. What do you think?
~TIO runs his hand through his beard, scratching his chin, thinking about the offer. He fixes the things he screwed up on Welsh’s desk before nodding~
TIO: Deal… and don’t worry… by the end of the night - you’ll know EXACTLY who has the honor of being destroyed by The Incredible One.
~Welsh smiles and lets out a small chuckle before returning to his chair and leaning back, feeling far more comfortable with the situation~
Marcus Welsh: Are you going to point them out for me on live television?
~He continues to smile, thinking he’s just tossing a harmless joke around. TIO closes in to Welsh’s face with a sinister look~
TIO: Oh trust me, you’ll know it when you see it.
~TIO exits Welsh’s office carrying the Paradigm Title over his shoulder. Welsh continues to lean back and talks to himself, once he’s alone~
~Marcus Welsh: I know he’s an insufferable prick - but damnit, I like the guy.
~We cut back to the announce table~
Smith: What a baby! He has to defend the title once every TWO months and he whines
Hood: He’s the prized possession of OCW. He’s the star player, the MVP. You only bring him out on special occasions, Smith.
Smith: Yea, well he’s always had a flare for the dramatic…so this ‘I’ll pick my opponent by the end of the night’ thing should be interesting…especially considering we have one match left
Hood: You know what that means…
Smith: What?
Hood: CJ and PerZag…TIO planning to pick an opponent before the night is out…
Smith: If those…those…JERKS debauch our OCW Title match I’m going to…well, I’m going to be very upset
Hood: Say…when is that match?
Smith: Folks…it’s next!
MJ Bell © (2-2) vs. PerZag (6-2)
Belvedere: Ladies and Gentlemen…it is now time for our MAIN EVENT OF THE EVENING!! This match is scheduled for one fall and is for the OCW CHAMPIONSHIP!
~ The lights of the arena go out. All that is seen is a small glow of light from the entrance ramp. ‘Eye Of The Tiger’ by Survivor starts to play over the PA system. A hooded figure walks on to the entrance ramp. The lights come back on as the hooded figure stands still on the stage. The hooded figure walks down to the ring slowly. He gets into the ring and stands in the centre of it. He slowly removes the hood and the crowd gives a mixed reaction to him. 'Eye Of The Tiger' by Survivor stops playing as PerZag walks over to a corner in the ring and crouches down near it~
Belvedere: Introducing first, the challenger…from Benalla, Victoria, Australia…standing 6’5 and weighing in at 216lbs…the most worthiest of them all...PerZag!!!
~ All the lights turn off leaving the arena in complete darkness. A voice is heard breaking the silence~
This world was being watched closely
By intelligences greater than man's and yet as mortal as his own.
~Drums begin to play as the darkness turns into a series of different colored lights that cast designs along the stage, audience and ramp like a kaleidoscope. From the back, MJ Bell walks out with a leather jacket on over her ring gear. She has her head dipped down, hands inside the pockets, as she stops at the mouth of the ramp tapping her foot to the music. MJ smirks, lifting her head up, raising both arms and yelling along with the song~
~Strutting forward the woman keeps her arms up before lowering them halfway down the ramp. Meanwhile the crowd chants “I’ll go,” to the tune of the music. MJ rushes to the ring jumping onto the apron then turning around with a smile. Her arms loop around one of the ropes as she glances about the crowd soaking up their reactions. MJ ducks beneath the ropes with a twist of her body turning into the ring. The chants continue when the question to asked once more. Finally, discarding the jacket she bounces back against a turnbuckle, stretching out each leg~
Belvedere: And his opponent…from Paradise, Michigan…standing 5’5 and weighing in at 125lbs…she is the OCW Champion…MJ BELL!!!!
~MJ Bell hands her OCW Title to Scruff. He shows it to PerZag before lifting it high in the air. The bell rings as Scruff hands the belt to Belvedere.~
Smith: And here we go…this is what it’s all about, Hood. The OCW Championship…this is why we announce matches, this is why the lights in the building shine down…this is why the OCW Arena is open on Monday nights…it is the sole reason every single member of the OCW roster signed on the dotted line…it’s
Hood: WE GET IT…it’s a big fucking deal
Smith: Indeed…MJ Bell is a two time champion, one of the few…if Harold were here, I’m sure he’d tell us just how many have held the belt more than once. PerZag…well, he’s up there with Mario Maurako as one of the greatest wrestlers in OCW history to never claim its top prize.
Hood: Well I’m pulling for PerZag. No offense to MJ…but that guy got fucked against Alice and he deserves this.
Smith: While I disagree with the first portion of your reasoning…I can’t argue the second, nobody deserves that belt more than PerZag…let’s see if he can do it!
~PerZag is standing in the middle of the ring, watching MJ. She approaches, cautiously. She extends her hand, looking for a show of sportsmanship. PerZag looks down. He slaps her hand away and grabs her by the chin. He forces her into the corner and leans in, speaking to her in a very menacing tone~
Smith: This is the same PerZag who nearly crippled the former OCW Champion at Like There’s No Tomorrow…he’s changed, he’s angry…
Hood: He’s finally found what it takes to be champion
Smith: That is such a misnomer…like you have to be evil to win the OCW Title
Hood: I didn’t say EVIL…I just said you have to be ruthless. Handshakes get you friend zoned, Smith. And you do not want to get friend zoned by the OCW Title…just ask Mario Maurako!
~He shoves her head back and spits in her face. The crowd goes “oooohhhh” as MJ’s head is tilted to the right with her facial features covered by disheveled, platinum strands. Slowly she turns her head back around and guides the hair into its proper place. She then slowly wipes the saliva from her left cheek and wipes it along her tights. She then nods and looks right back into the eyes of the monster from Benalla. She charges at him…PerZag stands, coiled and ready~
Smith: It’s go time!
Hood: These two aren’t fucking around…not anymore
Smith: This will be a classic!
~MJ SLIDES between PerZag’s legs. She pops back to her feet and hits the ropes. Zag turns around and is nailed with a spinning heel kick!! He staggers…MJ is on one knee…she throws a kick at the left leg of Zag…his base weakens. She gets to her feet and dropkicks Zag’s left leg. It goes out and he falls to one knee. She runs into the ropes, bounces off and throws The Burning Mage at his head! He ducks and rolls out of the ring quickly. The crowd gasps. The match nearly ended on that move. MJ lands on one knee and looks out at Zag who looks back into the ring. He gives a nod, acknowledging her efforts~
Smith: She won’t back down from anybody! A true fighting champion
Hood: All she can do is kick…if PerZag takes her legs out, she’s finished
Smith: She can do more than kick, I assure you
Hood: Oh, I know that…but I don’t think those types of activities are allowed inside the OCW ring. That’s the late, LATE night STARZ programming
Smith: That’s not what I was referencing!
~Zag takes a walk around the ring, strategizing. Scruff begins a count. He hits ‘FOUR’ as Zag stretches his afflicted knee, finding it to be responding favorably. He hops onto the apron and watches MJ. She’s on her feet, giving him plenty of room. Zag re-enters. MJ and Zag start to circle one another, looking for a weakness. Zag lunges for a lock up. MJ dodges it and kicks Zag in his left leg. He limps, slightly, lifting it up. He turns around and begins to show a bit of frustration~
Smith: MJ Bell is one of the quicker wrestlers we’ve had in OCW history
Hood: Yea but PerZag is no slouch
Smith: For a man his size he is incredibly quick
Hood: But not as quick as Matt Meyhu!
Smith: Ugh, I do not want to hear anything about The Aptitude…I want to remain focused on the two main eventers inside that ring
Hood: Alright, fine, fine…it should be a MARVEL of a match
Smith: Stop it!
~He lunges forward for another lock up attempt and, again, MJ dodges it and throws a drive by kick at his left leg. He favors it more than before. He turns around quicker and tries to get his hands on MJ…she slides underneath his grip and spears the back of Zag’s left leg!! He falls to the mat, on all fours. MJ wraps her body around his left leg. She twists and turns, contorting the leg. PerZag grimaces in pain and looks at the ropes which are nearby~
Smith: Smart strategy…he’s a big man, far bigger than she is…if she can eliminate his base than that size advantage is completely neutralized.
Hood: Fucking women…always looking to undercut great men!
Smith: That is so not true
Hood: Yes it is…goes all the way back to Alan and Eve
Smith: That’s Adam and Eve
Hood: Are you sure it wasn’t Alan?
Smith: Pretty sure
~Zag is able to easily drag MJ’s weight along with his body close enough to grasp the bottom rope. Scruff politely suggests a break. MJ holds on for the allotted five seconds before releasing the grapevine she had on Zag’s left leg. He turns over and sits up right, against the ropes. He works his left leg back and forth as MJ returns to her feet and paces. Zag reaches up and pulls himself to a vertical base using the ropes. He approaches MJ once again. He goes for another lock up…she dodges and goes for that kick again…this time he moves his left leg and she loses her balance…he clubs her in the back of the head with a vicious lariat!! MJ falls face first onto the mat and is slow moving. The crowd boos, slightly as he walks around on his leg, working out the pain~
Smith: Went to the well one too many times
Hood: What if someone is trapped in that well? Should you just stop going because you’ve already gone too many times? And, if you did stop going, wouldn’t the person starve to death?
Smith: What an insane line of questions
Hood: I happen to think those questions are very sane
Smith: Something an insane person would say
~Zag pulls MJ to her feet via a handful of hair. He drags her into the corner and slams her, face first into the top buckle. He does this again and again…ramming her face into the buckle at least seven times. He flips her around…her face is red and irritated. He knees her in the stomach. She doubles over…he lifts her out of the corner, turns around and drills her into the center of the ring with a spinebuster! The crowd boos louder. He gets to his feet and continues to work out his left leg, which is clearly still irritated~
Smith: Nice series of moves…PerZag is one of the more efficient wrestlers in OCW history
Hood: Yea, he doesn’t waste his time running around for no fucking reason
Smith: Every move counts with this man
Hood: Yea, well, aside from knife edged chops. Those don’t really seem to win him many matches
Smith: I’ve never seen anybody pinned via a knife edged chop
Hood: I have, Syren used to beat people with it all the time.
Smith: I don’t believe that for one second
~MJ tries sitting up…Zag kicks her with his right leg. She slams into the mat. He lifts his right leg up and leaps into the air dropping a leg across MJ’s throat. He rolls over and returns to his feet. He’s taking his time, real methodical in his movements. He grabs MJ by the hair and yanks her to her feet…he turns her around where her back is facing him…he locks her around the waist and tosses her over his head with a Release German Suplex!! MJ hits hard and slides near the ropes. PerZag sits up and looks over his shoulder at the disheveled OCW Champion~
Smith: I can tell you…from what I’ve heard, those are very painful
Hood: From what you’ve heard, eh?
Smith: Yes, I’d never endure one to find out
Hood: A TRUE broadcaster would, ya know
Smith: He would not…that’s dangerous work…don’t try it at home type of stuff
Hood: The population is getting way too high in this country. KIDS, DEFINITELY TRY THIS AT HOME…IN YOUR DRIVEWAY. Or, better yet…in the street!
Smith: Stop that!
~PerZag returns to his feet and grabs MJ by her hair. He yanks her to her feet and knees her in the gut. He hooks her around the waist, lifts her up and tosses her with a Gut Wrench Suplex!! She slams hard into the mat and winces in pain before falling to her side. PerZag, again, sits and takes a moment to collect his energy~
Smith: This is turning into a methodical dissection from OCW’s most worthy competitor, PerZag
Hood: About time…this is what would have happened earlier in the year if Bob hadn’t been in the way
Smith: Look, can we just let that go? He’s getting his shot tonight…if he wins, he’s the champ…if he loses, well, I guess we all know what that means
Hood: He gets ANOTHER shot
Smith: Negative…or, well, at least not for awhile
~Zag returns to his feet. MJ is struggling on her knees. She falters back to the mat…she gets back to all fours. Zag snares her by the hair once again. He pulls her up and stares in her face. He hugs her and tosses her over his head with a Belly to Belly Suplex!! She lands roughly with her legs slamming into the bottom rope. It’s the only thing that keeps her from falling out of the ring. PerZag, still on his feet turns and looks down at the OCW Champion and her beaten frame. The crowd begins to boo~
Smith: This is bordering on sadistic…if he’s got the capability of ending it he should just follow through
Hood: I’d normally agree but after his last OCW Title shot…I think he wants to beat her until she dies. Go all DRAGO on her.
Smith: Please, do not talk about Rocky IV…I might get emotional
Hood: Ya know, seeing as Rocky single handedly defeated the dastardly Russians in that fight against Drago…you think we should set up a Rocky vs. Putin fight? Couldn’t hurt, right?
Smith: I’m not going to suggest that to anyone…fearing it might actually happen
~PerZag yanks MJ away from the ropes and hooks her for the PerZag Perfection…she kicks her leg, aware of what Zag hooking her leg means. She’s able to free it. She struggles against his grip…they rotate one hundred eighty degrees…PerZag’s back is facing the ropes. MJ tries to pull away…Zag just says ‘fuck it’ and lifts her vertically for a suplex…he then drops her over the top rope…she falls all the way to the outside, landing on her legs! They buckle and her body crumbles to the ground. The crowd gasps as Zag looks out, over the ropes at MJ, who is on her back, eyes shut~
Smith: Is he trying to cripple every OCW Champion we have?
Hood: One by one, sure…I mean it’s a pretty efficient way of making sure you win the title
Smith: I’m just appalled at this man we’re seeing…PerZag has become unimaginably ruthless since his OCW Title loss over a month ago
Hood: He’s seen things, Smith. He’s changed. His eyes are open!
Smith: Whatever that means
~PerZag steps through the ropes and lands near MJ’s body. He grabs her left arm and yanks her to her feet. She sways back. Her legs have nothing left…her body is on the verge of collapse. Zag’s grip is the only thing keeping her standing. He grabs her throat and slams her up against the ring post. He reaches back with his right hand and delivers a LOUD knife edged chop across her chest!! She falls to her knees as the fans at ringside boo and point at Zag, angrily~
Smith: Devastating…this is hard to watch
Hood: I’m loving it…snuff films can be highly entertaining…as long as you’re not the one getting snuffed
Smith: That’s disgusting
Hood: Man, you’re on a roll with those knees? What’s next?
Smith: Deplorable
Hood: Anymore?
Smith: Depraved
Hood: Alright…this game isn’t fun anymore
Smith: Debauched
Hood: *mocking Smith’s voice* Let’s go back to the action!
Smith: Dastardly
~Zag grabs MJ by the nose and pulls her back to her feet. He shoves her against the ring post once more. Again he reaches back…he flings his arm forward with a knife edged chop. MJ ducks!! Zag’s hand PINGS loudly into the post!! He grabs it in pain! He doubles over, holding his hand, grimacing. The fans cheer~
Smith: DELIGHTFUL!
Hood: You prick!
Smith: Atta girl, MJ! C’mon, you can get back in this
Hood: He just chopped a post, he’ll be alright
~MJ staggers to her feet…she’s in rough shape. Zag turns around, holding his hand. She leaps into the air and hooks her legs around Zag’s head for a huricanrana….Zag hangs on and slams her body into the ring apron!!! He lets go and she falls to the floor. The fans boo. Scruff hops through the ropes and talks with Zag about getting the match back into the ring. Zag rolls his eyes and shoves Scruff away~
Smith: This man is showing no respect for the rules or for our champion
Hood: So what? If he wins, then it’s a great strategy
Smith: I would have disqualified him by now
Hood: Man, you’d DQ people if they looked at you funny
Smith: A look can be very hurtful
Hood: Oh, really…
Smith: DON’T LOOK AT ME LIKE THAT
~Zag turns his attention back to MJ. He yanks her to her feet…she shoves his hands off her and kicks him in the groin!! Zag doubles over. Scruff points and laughs. MJ’s legs wobble….she nearly falls over. The fans around cheer her on. She feeds off their energy. She steps away from the apron a few feet before running toward it. She sprints off and goes for the Burning Mage! Zag ducks! She hits SCRUFF in the head!! Scruff collapses to the floor, knocked out. MJ covers her mouth in shock…she heads over and kneels next to the ref~
Smith: On no!
Hood: Did Scruff just fucking pass out? Did he pull a Bob Grenier from OCW Survivor?
Smith: No, while you were busy giving me that AWFUL look…MJ hit Scruff with the Burning Mage
Hood: Really? As if his life isn’t tough enough being a worthless bum she has to kick him in the head? That bitch!
Smith: It wasn’t on purpose!
~Zag grabs MJ by the hair. Her back is to Zag. He hooks her under his arm for an inverted DDT. She jumps up…which might not have been a great idea as she’s now hanging over Zag’s shoulder. He looks toward the barricade and runs toward it, preparing to powerslam MJ into it. MJ slips off his shoulder! PerZag runs directly into the barricade and flips over, into the crowd!! He gets back to his feet quickly…MJ sprints at the barricade, steps up on it and propels her body through the air…she drives her knees into PerZag’s shoulders and takes him down!! He hits the cement surface hard…but so do MJ’s knees! She gets up, limping around as fans cheer the OCW Champion on~
Smith: Exciting action! But I think we may need medical to look at Scruff
Hood: Dude, he’s a bum…he’s survived worse, I assure you
Smith: Well, who’s going to call this match, then?
Hood: I’m sure he’ll wake up in due time
~MJ shakes it off and focuses on Zag. He’s on all fours, about to reach his feet. She kicks him in the face! This sends him upright, staggering back. Zag suddenly lunges forward, showing the impromptu aggression he’s known for. He tries to hit MJ with a lariat…she ducks and trips him up with a drop toe hold! Zag splats face first into the cement with a loud SMACK. He remains down, holding his face~
Smith: At first we saw the power of PerZag…now we’re witnessing the quickness of MJ
Hood: Yea, but she had to fucking cheat to get the upper hand…kicking Scruff in the head…just awful
Smith: I thought you hated Scruff
Hood: I hate all bums. But, ya know, why kick a man when he’s permanently down, ya know?
Smith: Some homeless patrons individuals their situations
Hood: I said bums…I didn’t say shit about homeless individuals
~MJ pulls Zag to his feet and tries to drag him back toward the barricade. He shoves her away and stumbles deeper into the crowd. He shoves several fans to the side, violently. MJ chases after him. She grabs him from behind…he throws a reactionary elbow. He hits her in the sternum. She backs up. Zag grabs a nearby chair. He turns and swings it wildly…MJ ducks…Zag hits a fan wearing a “Bob Grenier 420” shirt. He collapses. MJ kicks Zag in the gut…he drops the chair. She picks it up and rams the top of it into his gut. He staggers back, falling into some steps. He turns and crawls up the steps as they ascend through the crowd. MJ maintains a firm grip of the chair~
Smith: They are getting pretty deep into that crowd.
Hood: John E Depth would be proud
Smith: Please, do not soil this match by mentioning that man’s name!
Hood: Ouch
~Upon reaching the second level we see Zag and MJ are parallel to the stage. Zag stumbles near the barricade wall separating the fans from the stage. There is a fairly wide gap between the stage and the barricade. He turns around and is drilled in the head with a roundhouse kick! He staggers against the barricade. MJ hits him with a clothesline! He leans back…the crowd goes “woooaaahhh!!” MJ backs up a few paces and lunges forward again with a clothesline…he leans even farther back with the crowd, again going “woooaaahhhh!!!” MJ takes a few MORE paces back, measuring Zag up~
Smith: One more clothesline will send him over that barricade and tumbling into…well, whatever is down there
Hood: I hope it’s not a shark filled MOAT
Smith: I’m positive it isn’t that
Hood: I’m relieved and let down at the same time
Smith: An ambivalent Hood
Hood: I LOVE Ambiens! PerZag could probably use a few after this match
Smith: I said AMBIVALENT
~MJ rushes forward…PerZag ducks!! The crowd gasps with horror as MJ is lifted into the air. Fortunately for MJ fans and a certain Asian fellow, she lands safely atop the barricade!! PerZag turns around…she throws a kick, he ducks and hops onto the barricade with her. The two brawl! The crowd goes wild. MJ teeters…PerZag begins to win the brawl. She hops off the barricade, safely amidst the sea of eager people. PerZag turns around…he bends over and grabs MJ by the hair. She throws a kick at his left leg…it connects!! His leg gives, he nearly falls over…he turns around and jumps out of desperation…the crowd gasps…he lands on the stage, barely~
Smith: PerZag is very foturnate
Hood: Even with one fucking leg the man is an Olympic athlete!
Smith: Oh come on, the jump wasn’t THAT far
Hood: Moats are pretty wide, Smith
Smith: There isn’t any MOAT over there
~MJ hops onto the barricade. PerZag reaches his feet atop the stage and he turns around. MJ leaps off at Zag! Zag catches her and lifts her up for a powerbomb…MJ does the only thing she can think to do…she tightens her legs and flips backward with a huricanrana!!! The two tumble off the stage and into the gaping abyss between the stage and barricade!! There is a loud CRASH! Smoke and other forms of debris fly up as the fans go crazy! “HOLY SHIT” fills the arena as we can’t see any sign of life…just darkness and a rising cloud of dust~
Smith: Oh my goodness!!
Hood: Fucking shit…that’s the epitome of ‘if I go down, I’m taking you with me’
Smith: I hope they are okay…I think it’s high time we get a new ref out here
Hood: Is Scruff still napping?
Smith: He may be in a coma
~Puff emerges from behind the curtain. His fat, jiggly frame hustles down the ramp. He checks on Scruff. OCW security finally runs out and they help Scruff backstage. Puff waddles to the side of the ramp, near the gap where MJ and PerZag fell…carefully he looks around. It resembles a horror movie where some fat, soon to be dead idiot begins inspecting a dark cabin in the woods. We fear for Puff’s life~
Smith: I hope he finds two living beings in that darkness
Hood: You and me both…we only have room in OCW for ONE vampire
Smith: I just hope both competitors are okay
Hood: I would be fine if only PerZag survived…but that’s just me
Smith: It IS just you and how incredible RUDE
~Puff SCREAMS like a girl as a giant figure emerges! It’s PerZag!! His forehead is sliced open. His right shoulder is bleeding. His left leg is sore and weakened. He limps past Puff, toward the ring. Puff leans against the side of the ramp scared half to death. He then turns and looks for the OCW Champion~
Smith: Oh please let MJ be okay
Hood: Alright! Way to go Zag!
Smith: He hasn’t won anything yet
Hood: Well, I think he should…getting up from that first
Smith: Your respect?
Hood: Sure, PerZag…you’ve won my respect!
~The crowd grows anxious…they quiet. Puff nervously feels around the wreckage. He backs away. A thin silhouette emerges…a bright, white spot shines through the darkness. It’s MJ’s platinum hair! She stumbles out of the darkness, tripping over bits of debris. Puff asks if she’s okay…she shoves Puff aside and looks toward Zag who’s in the ring, staring back at her. She marches toward him…the crowd goes wild. Puff hustles to keep up~
Smith: And she’s okay!!
Hood: Mother fucker…that’s it, I’m creating a petition for a MOAT. Had there been a moat, she would not have survived.
Smith: And how do you know the sharks or gators or whatever creature within that moat wouldn’t have eaten PerZag?
Hood: Because he’s Australian and we all know Australians are tough to chew
Smith: How on EARTH would you know that?
Hood: I went camping with some cannibals once. It was scary.
Smith: Yikes
~MJ reaches the ring and rolls in. Puff pauses, catching his breath. Zag stomps on MJ with his left leg…it buckles. He grabs it in pain and staggers into the corner. MJ returns to all fours, shaking the impact off. Zag approaches MJ, keeping his left leg behind, trailing slight…protected. He reaches for MJ’s hair and pulls her to her feet. She pummels his face with a forearm. He responds by raking her in the eyes!! She falls to one knee…he kicks her in the face with his right leg. She falls over again. The crowd boos loudly as a winded Puff missed everything~
Smith: The officiating in this match…pardon my French…inhales greatly!
Hood: You mean it fucking sucks?
Smith: Yes!
Hood: I concur
~The booing INCREASES as two men in striped shirts appear from behind the curtain. The stripes are obviously hand made on white “CLASSIC OCW, BABY” t-shirts…which are currently for sale. The two individuals have giant, gold belts around their waists. They hustle down to the ringside with fake looks of concern on their faces~
Smith: It’s CJ O’Donnell and The Incredible One…get them out of here!
Hood: We need some order restored in this match…you said it yourself
Smith: Yes, from SANCTIONED officials
Hood: They are sanctioned, look at their shirts! Men of CJ and TIO’s stature wouldn’t wear those goofy shirts if they didn’t have to…for regulations and all
Smith: Can we get some help out here! Clientele, maybe?
Hood: Vargas is out of the building so that ain’t happening
~TIO remains on the side of the ring nearest the ramp. CJ hustles to the opposite side, facing TIO. PerZag looks around, angrily. TIO helps Puff into the ring. Puff thanks him. Zag yells at CJ for a moment and tells him to get lost. CJ throws his hands in the air in an innocent gesture. MJ returns to her feet…CJ points toward her. PerZag turs around and using his right foot he kicks her in the face with a big boot!! MJ hits the mat, hard. CJ claps, nodding. TIO rubs his chin, looking concerned~
Smith: Is CJ pulling for PerZag?
Hood: CJ is just pulling for the right thing to be done!
Smith: There’s always an ulterior motive with CJ and TIO
Hood: Not tonight, they are here for the prestige and integrity of this business
~Zag pulls MJ to her feet. The crowd boos and chants “Bullshit!” Zag hooks her for the PerZag Perfection. MJ starts to fight free. She kicks at his left leg. He winces…she kicks it over and over again. It buckles and he lets go…she turns and runs into the ropes…she bounces off and drills him in the left leg with Burning Mage!!! His leg completely gives out and he falls to his knees. The crowd goes wild chanting “MJ!!”~
Smith: The champ is rising! Like a phoenix!
Hood: Come on PerZag, raze this bitch!
Smith: I don’t care what happens as long as those two jerks don’t get involved
Hood: Relax, they are here to keep order…that’s IT
~MJ runs into the ropes and she bounces off against with Burning Mage into PerZag’s face. He falls backward. MJ is on her hands and knees catching her breath, she’s exhausted. PerZag starts to sit up. He falls back down. MJ looks around….the crowd is at a fever pitch. Puff is standing back, waiting to make the count. She holds up her finger for one more. She gets to her feet~
Smith: She needs one more to keep him down!
Hood: Damn is she looking to rearrange his face
Smith: She just wants to retain the title she’s missed for nearly three years, Hood
Hood: Yea well boo hoo…some people like PERZAG have never held it
~MJ sits PerZag up. She turns toward the ropes where TIO is standing. He slowly undoes his Paradigm Title. She runs for the ropes and leaps onto the middle one…before she can leap off, TIO reaches up and DRILLS her in the face with his Paradigm Title!! She falls harshly to the mat! The fans boo and chant “ASSHOLE” at TIO. He puts the belt back on…Puff didn’t see what happened. He runs over to inspect. TIO extends his arms in an innocent gesture~
Smith: What was that?!
Hood: MJ passed out mid move! I told you this main event stuff was too much for her!
Smith: She did not!
~CJ slides in…he slaps PerZag in the face, waking him up. He points toward MJ’s body…she’s on her back, unconscious. He shoves PerZag in her direction. CJ slides back out of the ring as Puff starts to turn around…PerZag continues, he crawls over and throws his arm across MJ’s stomach. Puff drops to his knees and makes the count~
1!
2!
3!!!!
~The bell rings~
Belvedere: Here is your winner…and the NEW OCW CHAMPION…PERZAG!!!!!
~The fans boo The Aptitude. CJ rushes around the ring, standing next to TIO. Puff doesn’t understand why the crowd is so angry. He yells out “PerZag can work, damnit! He’s a deserving champion!” TIO and CJ head up the ramp, pleased with their actions. TIO extends his arm…an OCW official rushes out and hands him the mic. He taps it…the tapping echoes throughout the arena. He leans in and speaks~
The Incredible One: Remember Madeline... you are nothing, without me.
~The crowd BOOS loudly as MJ slowly rolls out of the ring, covering her wounded face. TIO laughs and drops the mic. He and CJ exit through the curtain. The bloodied PerZag is helped to his feet by Puff. Belvedere enters into the ring with the prestigious OCW Title. The crowd stops booing and starts to respect the moment~
Smith: I’m curious to know the motives behind those men’s actions. I can very easily guess The Incredible One’s motive…but CJ’s seems vague.
Hood: Who the fuck cares…PerZag is the champ! A champion we can be proud of!
Smith: Indeed he is…congratulations are in order for PerZag!
~The OCW Title is strapped around his waist. PerZag wipes some of the blood from his face and slicks it through his wet, blonde hair, giving it that strange hue. He looks almost emotional. He is achieved, he has finally attained what he’s sought for three years. With the title around his waist the crowd cheers loudly. “PER! ZAG!” chants fill the arena. Fans stand up and give the man a standing ovation. He heads to a nearby corner and climbs atop it, throwing his arms in the air~
Smith: This is a great moment…regardless of what we just saw…PerZag deserves this more than any wrestler in OCW history
Hood: Fuck yes…way to go Zag!!!
Smith: I’m sure they will be partying in Benalla tonight!
~A few fireworks go off at the top of the arena. Some confetti falls with the fans cheering loudly. PerZag undoes the title and holds it high over his head. We zoom in on the proud man enjoying his finest hour~
Smith: Words can’t compare with the visual so I’ll just say that this is one of the greatest moments in OCW history
Hood: Right on…good shit, man
Smith: Folks, that’s all we’ve got for tonight…a ton of question are up in the air and I’m sure we’ll get some answers next week.
Hood: Sweet!
Smith: Congratulations to PerZag and we hope you’ve all enjoyed this week’s edition of Monday Night Massacre…see you all again next week!
~We get one final shot of PerZag with the OCW Title. He turns it around and stares at the emblem on the plate. He kisses it and then straps it back around his waist throwing his arms in the air again with more fireworks popping off. We fade to black with “PER! ZAG!” echoing throughout a vibrant, euphoric arena~