LIVE! January 23rd 2023
FROM The OCW Arena
In Key West, Florida
in such a terrible place…
~As the eerie voice fades, the lights dim and fog slowly rolls over the stage as if emanating from a dark beyond. The random sounds of a radio tuning through various stations floats over the arena as bright white lights suddenly shine up from beneath the stage, bathing the entryway in an angelic glow. Slowly, white webbing begins to appear on the darkened tron as boos fill the arena~
Smith: Not exactly a welcome reception for the Paradigm champion!
~As the hard-hitting beat of In This Moment’s ‘Adrenalize Me’ begins pumping through the arena… seconds pass but nothing happens…~
Hood: Where is she?!
BEFORE WE BEGIN
LEMME TELL YOU HOW I WANT IT
AND EXACTLY WHAT I NEED
~An audible sigh is heard through Smith’s mic~
Smith: I’m told she’s standing in the ready position staring at her iced out Rolex… making the fans wait for no reason at all.
Hood: Ahhh, ya gotta love her!
Smith: Actually, we don’t. There’s not a person in this arena that isn’t sick of her holier than thou attitude, it’s a wonder she even showed up tonight–
Hood: She showed up to save us from Monday Night Mediocrity! At least, that’s what she said on Twitter!
Smith: Make room, Hood, I’ll do a cartwheel!
~As the moments pass and the fans are left waiting, the boos get louder and louder until finally, the White Widow emerges from the back, followed by one of her Sminions, who is carrying a large cardboard box.~
~As security surrounds the Paradigm champion, she is notably without her coveted title belt. She waves off the fans yelling obscenities her way and makes her way down toward the ring, where the slowly climbs the steps before wiping her boots on the ring apron and stepping through the ropes.~
~The cardboard box is fitted beneath the bottom rope and slide into the ring for her, as she motions for a mic. As she lifts the mic to her lips, the boos get so thunderous she lowers the mic and waits, rolling her eyes. Moments later she lifts the mic again, but once again lowers it–~
Smith: This is the reception she deserves.
Sahara: First and foremost, lemme get the elephant in the room outta the way. I know you’re wondering where the Paradigm championship is, and I may have lost it at my New Years Eve party, which none of you were invited to… but trust me, I have my people on it, so have no fear… it will be found!
Smith: You have got to be kidding me… she lost it?!
Hood: People lose things, Smith. Look at how these fans lost their minds when she came out here!
Sahara: And if I’m being honest, it’s kind of a pain in the ass to get through airport scanners anyway, so… whatever.
Alright listen up… I hear you.
~Looking out across the sea of jeering fans, Sahara nods~
Sahara: I see you and I hear you. I know I’ve not been the person you all know I’m capable of being… but if you’d allow me to explain myself–
Smith: This should be interesting.
Sahara: It’s not easy when you transcend an organization that brought you in and gave you a chance, but between my time as the star quarterback of the New York Pride LFL football team–
~This instantly brings out thunderous boos~
Sahara: …and my time spent on set filming The Fall of Madison Tower, SPLAT TV’s most popular and highest rated television show!
~And louder…~
Sahara: And finally my involvement wrestling under the CCPE banner versus the world, where I will destroy that has-been Easton Alexander and his little sidekick Moonlight whatever her name is…
~As the boos rain down upon her, she can’t help but smirk as she lowers the mic and waits~
Smith: You just knew this apology was nothing but a bragging session…
Hood: These people should be cheering for the fact she’s even here! She’s a star quarterback on the gridiron, having thrown 3 touchdowns in 2 games… both victories I might add. All while filming the hit television show Madison Tower, not to mention wrestling for CCPE, and STILL finding the time to come here and grace us with her presence?!
Smith: You are unbelievable, Hood.
Hood: Thank you!
Sahara: So now that you know why I’ve been so busy trying to bring some of my spotlight to OCW, because PIC sure can’t get it done… lemme get down to business, cuz I’m out here for a reason…
~Bending over while making sure the cameras get a good long look of her figure, she opens the cardboard box and pulls out a little trophy~
Sahara: I’m here to do something OCW seems to have forgotten about. The year end awards!
Smith: What? Welsh is having HER do the award announcements?!
Hood: I can’t believe Welsh pulled this off!
Smith: Jesus Christ…
~Pulling out a fancy gold decorated envelope, she slowly opens it and looks it over~
Sahara: First and foremost… we have the OOC member of the month award! And it goes to… yours truly, ME!
~As looks of confusion spread around the arena, Smith chimes in~
Smith: OOC award? What the hell is she doing?!
Hood: Exposing the industry! I love it!
~Looking back at the sheet of paper, she whispers into the mic~
Sahara: Look at this list of winners… Sahara, Sahara, Sahara again… more Sahara. I mean, I expected this, but… I’m too humble for this sort of thing.
Smith: Did she say she’s too humble?!
Sahara: You know what, rather than going through every one of the awards, I’ll skip the ones that I won… which just happens to be a lot of them.
Hood: As expected…
Smith: Nothing about this is real, Hood.
~Bending down, she takes out a second trophy and opens the envelope~
Sahara: So first up for the awards I didn’t win, we have the best world champion of 2022! And the winner is…
~The fans *finally* cheer, anticipating PIC as the winner, only she rolls her eyes in exaggerated fashion~
Sahara: Eh, who cares.
~The fans boo as she tosses the trophy over her shoulder and bends down to retrieve another~
Sahara: Ah, here we go! Now this is an award worthy of its winner! And the participation trophy of the year goes to… the one and only Crash and his annoying kid Trash!
Hood: Crash won the participation trophy award!
~Just then, the ominous beat the No Love by the Death Grips hit’s the PA, sending the crowd into a frenzy, and without delay, Crash comes charging out through the curtains, down the aisle… Sahara notices this, and throws the participation award trophy like a laser, hitting him in the shoulder and nearly taking him off his feet!~
Hood: Perfect pass from the perfect quarterback, Smith!
Smith: I don’t think Crash cares! He charged right through the blow and hit the ring!
Hood: He’s gonna be feeling that one later! That was a direct hit!
~As Crash hits the ring, Sahara attempts to bail, but he just gets a fistful of her platinum hair as she was about to escape through the ropes! The crowd goes wild as Crash wags his finger that she ain’t going anywhere. Pulling her back into the ring, Sahara Duke holds both her hands up, begging him off!~
Hood: What a coward, she’s in heels and isn’t ready for this sort of thing!
Smith: You’ve gotta be kidding me… do us all a favor Crash! Hit her!
~As Crash looks out around the crowd, a “Hit the Bitch” chant breaks out, spreading through the arena like wildfire!
Smith: Do ya hear these fans, Hood?! Do it!
~Slowly making a fist and nodding along with the crowds demand, Sahara continues begging him off and just kicks him in the nuts!~
~The crowd yells NOOOOOOOOO, but then pops!~
~The crowd explodes when they realize Crash caught her foot, once again wagging his finger at her! Winding up, Crash pulls her by the ankle toward him and nails her in the forehead, knocking her on her ass and right out of her heels!~
Smith: Yes!
Hood: How dare you! How dare HE! Who does he think he is, laying his hands on a goddess…ON THE CHAMP?
Smith: She’s a champ, Hood. She’s not THE champ.
Hood: You shut your whore mouth!
~Wincing from the blow, Sahara looks up to see Crash towering over her. She’s reached the horrible realization that she’s alone. Prone. Vulnerable. Crash lifts his foot to stomp on the champ…but OCW security hits the ring! The fans BOOOO~
Smith: What’s this?!
Hood: Finally! What took so long? My gosh, she might have a bruise, Smith. An actual blemish on that otherwise perfect face.
Smith: She’s a wrestler for goodness sakes. Not the mona lisa.
Hood: She puts the mona lisa to fucking shame.
~Crash is yanked away from Sahara. He tries to fight through, but can’t. Sahara is offered a hand…it belongs to Welsh. He helps her to her feet…her confidence suddenly returns as she demands Crash be fired, suspended…something. We can’t overhear what Welsh is saying but he relays something to Sahara which seems to placate her, for the time being~
Smith: What is going on between those two?
Hood: Welsh doing what any smart leader would do…protecting the most valuable asset in pro wrestling.
Smith: Is the FIX in? It’s an Extremely Enforced Rules Match at Decadence…but will the rules be more strictly enforced for one wrestler than the other?
Hood: Hey, who’s to say?
Smith: I don’t like the way this feels, fans. Welsh is clearly out to destroy B.O.B. and, well, this affinity he has for Sahara isn’t going to help Crash AT ALL in his match. If you’ll remember, he had originally picked Sahara to face PIC for the OCW Title at Decadence.
Hood: Only to have it RUINED by those bastards.
Smith: We’re just SIX days away from Decadence…SIX DAYS AWAY from finding out if Sahara can defeat Crash or if Mr. Rodriguez truly has her number.
~Sahara watches as Crash is dragged from the ring. She’s holding her face, where she got popped. Welsh looks at it and screams, “MEDIC! WE NEED A MEDIC IN HERE RIGHT NOW!” The Knife Man comes sprinting down the ramp to check on Sahara. A stretcher is wheeled in behind him. Crash looks on, incredulous~
Smith: Oh please.
Hood: This is very serious, Hood. I hope she’s okay.
~Welsh and The Knife Man help Sahara from the ring where she takes a seat on the stretch, laying back. Together, they wheel her up the ramp with the fans booing. They wheel her past Crash, who continues to be held back by security. Welsh stops to yell at him, “You made a big mistake, Crash. Big mistake.” He hears Sahara moan out in pain, promptly turning his attention back to the stretcher as they wheel her through the curtain to the back. Crash looks on, shaking his head. The fans start to rally behind him, chanting his name as he looks out to the crowd~
Smith: Crash getting some support from the OCW diehards. He may not be the nicest guy around…but they like him way more than they do Sahara.
Hood: I just hope Sahara is able to compete on Sunday. This is very serious, Smith.
Smith: She’s fine!
Hood: She just got stretchered out, you heartless mother fucker. Her career might be over!
Smith: I’m not going to talk about this…it’s insane.
~Crash is finally allowed to head through the curtain…the fans cheer him on, eager to see him get his hands on Sahara in six days~
Smith: In just SIX days Crash Rodriguez will have the opportunity to finish what he started tonight. He’s already defeated her once…if he can do it again at Decadence, he’ll walk out with OCW gold as the NEW Paradigm Champion.
Hood: Yea? Well I got a pair of dimes in my right pocket that say that won’t happen.
Smith: If the fix is in, you’re probably right. A stipulation like the Extremely Enforced Rules Match is one where officiating could play a MAJOR role in deciding the outcome.
Hood: All I know is Welsh will do what he always does…what’s best for OCW.
Smith: I hate the sound of that. We’ll be right back folks with more Massacre after this!
BAM!
~The double metal doors to the backstage area of the OCW Arena swing open as a fog machine must be working overtime. The fog rolls in from the outside because of the magical powers of science, as does the quartet of the Influence. Quartet? Well, there’s Chris Wrigley, the lawyer of the Influence, walking in first through the fog machine wearing his navy blue suit complete with bright yellow tie and carrying his briefcase. The briefcase is where he keeps his lawyer stuff, and now how he smuggles things into shows. He is followed by Claudia Frost who is wearing the exact same fur coat that she appeared on back on the July 18th episode of Monday Night Massacre. Someone did some research, fam. And just like back in Kansas City, Claudia has her dog Beans with her in a matching, albeit smaller, fur coat~
~Wrigley puts down the briefcase and hits an invisible three pointer, while Claudia lifts up her oversized sunglasses to make sure she’s noticed by everyone standing there. Beans barks at those same people and struggles to break Claudia’s grip and attack everyone~
~That accounts for three of the four. Which leads to the last member of the Influence who walks through the fog, and that’d be Delia Black. Unlike the other three members of this team who are showing off for everyone to see, Delia is wearing mostly black like she raided a Hot Topic store. Her skin is pale, and she wears sunglasses too, but only to hide the bags under her eyes~
FROST: Everyone gather ‘round, gather ‘round. Because the Influence has returned!
~Nobody gathers around, because they all have jobs to do. However, Claudia doesn’t seem to care all that much about that as she looks for someone to take the growling dog from her clutches~
FROST: What? Where’s the confetti? We were promised confetti to rain down upon us once we walked through the door. Does anyone see anything falling from the sky? Nope. Wrigley, let’s write this down and remember it when contract negotiations start up again.
You. Come here and hold my Beans.
~Some poor random employee is handed the small dog, maybe a chihuahua mix? Hard to tell while it’s wearing the fur coat. But damn, the thing immediately attacks the employee who does their best to try and take the thing away to the locker room. Wrigley moves over to where Claudia is standing, while keeping an eye on Delia~
WRIGLEY: You think this is a good idea?
FROST: What?
WRIGLEY: Bringing Delia into public like this. She’s doing the thing again where she just clicks her jaw and staring directly at a person. Honestly, it’s all kind of unnerving.
~Claudia turns her head over to where Delia is standing and yes, Delia is doing that exact same thing. The poor OCW backstage person has no idea what to do as a response to the clicking and stare down, maybe some drool too? Claudia gives a yikes look and turns back towards Wrigley~
FROST: Okay, maybe it wasn’t the best plan to bring her here. But we had to try something because all she does at the apartment is to stare into dark rooms or eat all of Beans’ dog toys. Maybe a little pro-wrestling could do her good, what’s the worst that could happen?
~Sure enough, Delia has taken the random OCW backstage employee’s hand and has begun to sniff it aggressively. Once again, the dude has no idea what to do in response to this~
WRIGLEY: That chick is looney tunes.
FROST: No, she’s probably going to bite. That’s how New Delia learns who is and who is not a friend… she probably learned it from watching Beans, I think.
WRIGLEY: We need to get her to the locker room as quickly as possible, I’m not going to court to try and defend this nonsense.
FROST: Agreed.
~With that, Wrigley is able to yank Delia away from the random OCW backstage guy right before she’s about to clamp down on his arm with her teeth and the Influence is gone like the wind before any possible legal problems arise~
Smith: The Influence is back and they return to the ring, tonight!
Hood: Yea, but Delia looks like she's seen some shit.
Smith: I know she went missing. Appears as though they've found her.
Hood: Maybe she went to prison. Ya know, prison changes people.
Smith: That's what I hear. I don't plan on finding out.
Hood: Or maybe she spent some time in another promotion. I hear that's a fate worse than prison.
Smith: I couldn't tell ya...all I know is this extremely entertaining duo is back and they look to be a major threat for the OCW Tag Titles...and, not just that, but Delia is going to compete int he opening match at Decadence for a shot at the Craze Title!
Hood: You other 7 competitors...you guys had better get your rabies shot! She's a biter!
Smith: The Influence will return to the ring later tonight. Up next, however...a debut! Last week we saw AZAZEL make an impact by laying out Brett Daniels and Killian Neville, ruining their match in an effort to get himself over. It appeared to work as the buzz around the water cooler all week has been about this guy.
Hood: What water cooler? I bring my own water. Expensive shit.
Smith: Now, we get to see what this man can do inside the ring! Let's head down to ringside as AZAZEL makes his OCW in-ring debut!
AZAZEL (0-0) vs. Parody Account (0-0)
~ Parody Account is already in the ring. No music for him. Was it because the writer is too lazy to look for a bio? Does P.A. even have a bio? He's a NPC so who cares? ~
Belvedere: Ladies and Gentlemen, the following contest is scheduled for one fall! Currently in the ring...Parody Account!!!
~ P.A. raises his arms, hoping for some reaction. He gets none. He lowers his arms, looking as if just watched every Jace Parker Davidson match back to back. We here at OCW wouldn't wish that on anyone.
The lights then dim as the opening of "Lucifers Hymn" begins to play throughout the PA system... We can hear something building in the background the lights begin to pulse... then at the first drop about 30 seconds in, □□□□□□ makes his way out onto the stage, with "The Man in Red" behind him as the lights pulse to the beat... as it dies down he slowly makes his way down the ramp as Belvedere makes their introduction. ~
Belvedere: And introducing at this time, from Parts Unknown... he is The Fallen Angel... A...ZA...ZEL!
~ It's at that point that □□□□□□ has reached the bottom of the ring, he looks around once more... Then another drop hits, and something in him flips, with him sliding under the ropes and acting aggressive, holding his fists to his jaw, before then slamming one of them on the top rope facing the hard camera, before settling to a corner, waiting for the match to begin. ~
Hood: Great, just what we need. Another creepy dude in a mask.
Smith: Don't be a mask racist.
Hood: I'm not! I'm just saying that after a while, it stops being interesting.
Smith: Maskist!
~ Puff checks both dudes and starts the match. As soon as the bell rings, Azazel runs at Parody Account and blasts him in the face with such a Yakuza Kick, Trent Acid is cheering him from the great beyond! Parody gets kicked so hard, he actually flips backwards and lands on the mat face down! Azazel goes to pin P.A. when the Man In Red yells at him to stop. He looks at his manager who tells him to inflict more punishment! The fans boo at The Man.
Azazel grabs Parody Account by the hair and drags him to his feet. P.A. tries to swing a few weak punches, but Azazel simply avoids them. He grabs P.A. by the arm and tries to set him up for Heaven Help Us, but Account counters and whips Azazel into the ropes. The masked man bounces back and Parody goes for a clothesline! Azazel ducks! He gets behind Parody and puts his arms around his waist and nails him with a snap German Suplex! The back of Parody's head bounces hard off of the mat! ~
Smith: A total show of dominance by the newcomer.
Hood: He should get it over with.
Smith: Why? Because you hate seeing people with masks?
Hood: Oh shut the fuck up.
~ Azazel drags Parody over to a corner and kicks him a few times before climbing the ropes. With his back to his opponent, Azazel leaps off the top turnbuckle gracefully with the Flew To Close phoenix splash!! Azazel crashes hard on Parody, driving the air out of his opponent's lungs!! Azazel hooks the leg as Puff gets in position. ~
1……..
2……..
THREE!!
Belvedere: Here is your winner….. AZAZEL!!
~ The fans boo as The Man in Red gets in the ring cackling as Azazel stands. He lifts his clients arm up to celebrate the victory. ~
Hood: Impressive showing for Azazel.
Smith: Indeed it was. Almost as impressive as you showing support for a masked wrestler.
Hood: You're an idiot.
~We cut backstage where Marcus Welsh answers a knock at his door. He pulls the door back to reveal OCW’ owner ADI GOLD! The fans inside the OCW Arena pop! It doesn’t appear as though Welsh had been expecting Miss Gold. He moves to escort her to a seat in front of his desk but she just plops down behind the desk. Welsh takes the pedestrian seat, looking upward at Adi~
Marcus Welsh: Miss Gold...I hadn’t…
Adi Gold: What’s this I’m hearing about you trying to destroy B.O.B.?
Marcus Welsh: Excuse me?
Adi Gold: I managed to get internet access for a few minutes while in Newfoundland and received a text from an anonymous source that you’re setting B.O.B. up to fail at Decadence. So, I had to come back to see if it was true. Look into my eyes, Marcus.
~Adi takes her two fingers...she points them at Welsh’s eyes and then back at hers...her fingers are a little too close together, so she kinda goes cross eyed~
Marcus Welsh: Umm, well...I mean, that’s just ridiculous.
Adi Gold: Is it, Marcus? Is it?!
Marcus Welsh: Look...people can read into things whatever they want. The fact is B.O.B. is featured in all four of our title matches. So, they have a chance to leave Decadence with ALL the OCW Titles. I’m giving them the chance they’ve been begging for. The chance to actually take over.
Adi Gold: Are you sure this isn’t some plot to destroy them?
~Adi leans in, eyes narrow...studying Marcus~
Marcus Welsh: 100%, Miss Gold. I know how you feel about TK. I know you're close with the members of B.O.B. I’d never think to undermine you or them. This is an opportunity, not a death sentence. I promise.
~Adi stares. Welsh looks back. Adi stares. Welsh clears his throat. Adi stares. Welsh waits. Adi finally leans back~
Adi Gold: Okay! Glad we got that settled. Whew. I don’t know about you but I could go for some milk.
Marcus Welsh: I’m good.
Adi Gold: LARRY!
~Adi calls out for her personal assistant before exiting the office. Welsh leans forward, burying his head in his hands...three weeks in and the stress is already getting to him. We cut to commercial~
Donnie Harris (2-1) vs. All IC Bro (0-0)
~All IC Bro is in the ring. He’s got some gloves on. Gloves he probably thinks are MMA worthy...but they actually look like tube socks with a few holes cut out so his fingers could slide through. They go up to his elbow. He throws some punches at the camera, he bounces around...a stick of SLIM JIM jerky hangs from his mouth~
Belvedere: Ladies and Gentlemen...the following contest is scheduled for one fall! Currently in the ring...he never blurs the lines. He keeps it always IC. He is...ALL IC BRO!!!
~All IC Bro throws a few punches at the camera. “That’s right, bitch! Donnie Harris ain’t nothin! And that olive green color sucks!” The fans gasp. He turns around, yelling at them, “Hey! Hey! Relax, it’s ALL IC, you guys! ALL IC!”~
Belvedere: And, his opponent…
"You'll be cryin' like a bitch!"
~This line from the chorus blasts over the speakers before the song opens with its opening drumline. As soon as the lyrics start, Donnie slowly emerges from behind the curtain wearing a loosely-tied BJJ gi top and a pair of standard boxing shorts. He stands at the top of the ramp in a pair of amateur wrestling shoes that match the shorts. He slowly starts walking down the ramp halfway into the first verse~
Belvedere: On his way to the ring... standing at 6-foot-3-inches tall, weighing in at 228 pounds...
~Donnie moves from the bottom of the ramp to the steel steps, jumping up a couple steps at a time up onto the ring apron, moving through the ropes slowly~
Belvedere:...DONNIE... HARRIS!
~Donnie starts to take his gi top and moves to his corner, throwing the shirt up and over the top rope onto the floor for the ring crew to move. He rests against the corner and stretches, breathing deeply and waiting for the bell~
Smith: Donnie Harris back in the ring! An impressive newcomer...he took a temporary leave of absence but he’s back!
Hood: Yea, definitely one of those guys with that ‘don’t fuck with me’ look.
Smith: The kind of look somebody like All IC Bro should definitely stay away from.
Hood: Ha, good luck.
~Belvedere exits and the bell sounds. Donnie remains in his corner, eyeing All IC Bro. All IC Bro throws some ghost punches into the air...he bounces around...he throws a few side kicks that don’t really get all that high...he nearly falls to the mat, losing his balance. He straightens his posture and extends his arms, “What? WHAT?!”~
Smith: Quite the display from All IC Bro
Hood: Hey, as far as confidence goes, he’s a 10/10.
Smith: Indeed.
~Harris has seen enough of this ‘display’. He marches toward All IC Bro. All IC Bro spins around for a backfist...but Donnie catches his arm and spins All IC Bro back around. All IC Bro looks up at Donnie...Donnie smacks him across the face. All IC Bro is staggered...Donnie kicks him in the thigh. He then kicks him in the gut. Donnie then lifts a leg high and slams it into All IC Bro’s chest, sending him crashing to the mat. The fans sound impressed with Donnie’s vicious and precise striking~
Smith: All three of those kicks landed exactly where they were supposed to and with tremendous force.
Hood: All IC Bro should just tap out right now.
Smith: That’d be a first.
Hood: Self preservation.
~All IC Bro, to his credit, tries to get to his feet...Donnie helps him...right into a clinch. He lifts one knee up into All IC Bro’s breadbasket...which is more than enough to smash the wind from his lungs and send him to the mat, gasping for air. Harris takes a step back. All IC Bro looks up at him...fear in his eyes. Donnie Harris proceeds to swiftly turn the lights out with Ride the Lightning (Shining Wizard)!!!! All IC Bro collapses to the mat, unconscious. Harris makes the easy pin with Scruff sliding in to administer the count~
1!
2!
3!!!!
~The bell rings~
Belvedere: Here is your winner...DONNIE HARRIS!!!!!
Smith: Dominating win for Donnie Harris!
Hood: No shit.
~Harris returns to his feet and he kicks All IC Bro out of the ring. The fans give a strong ovation, mostly impressed by his physical dominance. Harris stares into the hard camera, giving us a good glimpse into the determination this man has to succeed~
Smith: I was impressed with him before...but now? Now I believe this man has what it takes to make a real impact in OCW.
Hood: Well, the competition is going to be a hell of a lot tougher than All IC Bro...but, yea, if he keeps at it and stays determined, he’ll do fine.
Smith: Donnie Harris with a dominant victory in his return match! The youth of his roster continues to impress as we just start to scratch the surface of 2023!
~Smith pulls out a box of OCW PROUD AND STRONG condoms. He's about to shill these things.~
Hood: What the fuck are those?
Smith: Folks, are you tired of protection that isn't really protection? Are you tired of being unable to feel what you want to feel? Are you...
Hood: Geezus
Smith: Wait a minute...hold on what’s this?
~Smith presses his finger to his ear so he can hear production instructions better.~
Hood: No. It can’t be.
Smith: We have a camera heading to the back now and it sounds like there's been some trouble in the back.
Hood: At a wrestling show? No way!
~Your screen turns all shaky cam like it’s the Blair Witch Project. The cameraman is racing through the backstage area. Through all the commotion, gawkers, and wrestle bunnies we see OCW doctors. They’re surrounding someone who’s down.~
Smith: Who is it?
~The camera keeps tryin to catch a glimpse of who it is. Failing as the physicians are blocking the shot. Finally the camera catches who it is, It’s Thunder Knuckles. He’s clearly been attacked in catering next to the beer tent. His sunglasses also appear to be missing~
Hood: Wow, Thunder Knuckles earns a shot at PIC and look what happens! You know PIC has something to do with this!
Smith: I doubt that but someone has taken out Thunder Knuckles.
Hood: And they took his shades! Now how is he going to look in the mirror? The man’s image is too bright for normal eyes!
~The visual of Thunder Knuckles laying on the ground as doctors attend him remains on your screen.~
Hood: Cowardice! Sheer cowardice! Who ever did this should be dragged into the street and sho-
~Smith quickly cuts off Hood because theres too much gun violence on television these days.~
Smith: -The production team says it’s time to move on with the show.
Hood: They better find out who did this!
Smith: Urgent development here, folks. We'll get back with you as soon as we can when and if we have an update on Thunder Knuckles condition. Until then, let's cut to a commercial break.
~We cut backstage where AKB is standing by with a special report~
AKB: Alpha Kenny Body here with an urgent update on an injured OCW star!
Smith: Finally, some clarification on the Thunder Knuckles attack and his health heading into Decadence!
AKB: I’ve just been informed that Paradigm Champion aka THE CHAMP Sahara is resting easy after a major scare earlier this evening when Crash dared to lay his hands on her. If it wasn’t for the immediate response by the great people working here at OCW and, well, Sahara’s amazing strength and determination...well, we might have lost her, folks.
Smith: This is beyond ridiculous. She took a shot to the head from Crash. She was clearly fine!
Hood: Hey! She’s very precious, Smith. She has to be protected at all costs. I, for one, am relieved that she’s doing okay. I just hope she can make it to Decadence on Sunday...but, if not, I understand. We can’t risk her, OUR future.
AKB: I’ve also been told that the doctors are telling her she shouldn’t compete at Decadence. BUT...being the true champion that she is...she’s going to go against doctor’s orders...she’s going to put her health on the line...she’s going to risk it all and show up at Decadence THIS Sunday and defend her Paradigm Championship.
Smith: Unbelievable.
Hood: Isn’t it? She’s truly amazing. We are lucky to live in the time of Sahara.
AKB: That’s just about it from back here. Looks like we dodged a major bullet, folks. We can all rest easy.
Smith; WHAT ABOUT THUNDER KNUCKLES?
AKB: Who?
Smith: THE #1 contender who was, ya know, legitimately hurt earlier?
AKB: Oh, umm, Like, I don’t fuckin know, man.
Smith: Whatever. You’re useless. Let’s get back to the show.
Hood: I don’t know why you’re so angry. We just got great news. Sahara dodged a serious injury and is going to fight through all the pain and danger to compete at Decadence!
Smith: Yea, sure...let’s just move on. That type of stuff annoys me to no end.
Hood: Hey, I know it’s scary, seeing a legendary champion like Sahara take a serious injury like that...so if you’re rattled and need some time to compose yourself, I’ve got this.
Smith: Oh shut the -bleep- up!
Hood: SMITH!
Smith: Folks, it’s time for more in ring action to help...move along from this foolishness. Easton Alexander made his shocking return a few weeks back and tonight...he’s back in the ring! Let’s head to ringside to see how he looks!
Easton Alexander (15-14) vs. Zeus (0-0)
Smith: Ladies and Gentlemen after 4 months we have waited so long for the arrival of This man…
~The lights focus to the ramp and as the sounds of the crowd lower. A song begins to play but not the Subhuman Self Theme that we are so used to but a low guitar riff of Hearts Burst Into Fire by Bullet for my Valentine~
Smith: A new sound and perhaps a new look?
Hood: Maybe he wont look like a kidnapper.
~The song picks up as Easton Alexander walks slowly onto the ramp to an incredible reaction. He laughs just taking in the atmosphere before making his walk. He steps up onto the apron and wipes his feet before entering. He steps onto the middle rope before pointing down, signaling that “This is my house!”~
Belvedere: From Toronto Ontario, Canada… He is the Canadian DRAGON… EASTON… ALLLLEXANDERRRR.
~Easton steps down and stares at his opponent~
Belvedere: Already in the ring… He is the Greek god Zeus!
~Jeers come from the crowd as Easton readies himself. Scruff comes over to check Easton for weapons and as he pats his boots Easton messes up his hair, which gets a laugh from the crowd and from the official~
Smith: Easton is in great spirits tonight, getting a raise out of senior official Scruff. Zeus however doesn’t look too impressed.
Hood: Yeah well Zeus holds a win over Easton dating back to May of last year. Another roll up and its all over.
Smith: That’s right Hood, plus Easton is Rusty.
~We focus back to the ring as the bell dings, Easton begins to circle around Zeus who does the same except a little slower because his legs are little shorter. Zeus charges with a punch to the gut, then another. Easton who looks a little larger then we last saw him shrugs off the strikes. Zeus pauses before attempting a LOW BLOW! But its stopped by Easton as the crowd start telling Zeus how fucked he is~
Smith: I don’t know what I expected as Zeus tries to take the Low road if you catch my drift.
~Easton Whips Zeus into the ropes and on his way back he picks him up with a gorilla press. He holds him up for 5, 10, 15, 20 seconds before switching to one hand which the crowd loves, Easton flexes with his off hand before dropping Zeus to the mat with a loud crash~
Hood: Press slam by Easton.
Smith: Decently impressive strength.
~Zeus is dazed as he gets back to his feet immediately into powerbomb position. Easton hooks the left arm, then the right. The crowd know exactly what’s next as he lifts Zeus into the air and nails him with a Tiger Driver~
Smith: DD-98!
Hood: Cover him and go home.
~Easton crawls over and he hooks the leg. Scruff counts the pinfall~
1
.
.
2
.
.
3!!!
Smith: Welcome back Dragon. Its like he never left!
Hood: I wish he never came back!
Smith: Oh, stop it… Look like Easton’s grabbing a mic.
~Easton throws his ring jacket over his shoulder before breathing heavy and holding up one finger~
Easton: I just need a minute… I’ve been away for a while so I have some things to say. I left because I felt like I didn’t deserve wrestling, because I didn’t like my actions. I did horrible things to people who didn’t deserve it and it ate at my heart enough to where I couldn’t sleep at night. So I left and in my stead my protégé got better than me way quicker than I ever thought she could have. And at this point I was fine with never coming back, I could just watch Moonlight continue my legacy and I would sit on my couch and collect unemployment. But I couldn’t help but think back to some very nice voicemails from a certain bastard. And you know who you are, and I know your watching this. You have till the PPV to admit to what you did to me or next massacre I will show the world what a manipulative prick you really are.
~Easton throws the mic down as he walks to the back leaving the crowd very curious~
Smith: What is he talking about?
Hood: I don’t know but if I had to guess...my money is on that it has something to do with Crash.
Smith: Easton is one of the front runners for Newcomer of the Year in 2022. He’s got all the tools to break out this year in OCW. He certainly seems motivated.
Hood: I hope so. Shit seemed to go sideways with the kid when he started dealing with our former owner. Now that all that mess is behind him maybe he can focus up and get back on track.
Smith: I certainly hope so. We’ll see where all this leads but it sounds as though more light will be shed on this situation at our next Monday Night Massacre! Alright, let's cut to a commercial break. More Massacre when we return!
The Influence (0-0) vs. Tornado Alley (0-0)
Smith: Good to see both Vortex and Debris are fine after that freak tornado in Iowa this past week.
Hood: One day we’ll be fortunate when they finally catch a tornado.
Smith: That’s not what, oh I get it.
Belvedere: And their opponent’s from the Murder Capital of the World, Santa Carla, California… the Influence!!
~“Send Me Your Money” as the bassline hits the lights begin to strobe.~
# Lights. #
~Out from the back step out the Influencers of social media platforms across the world to an enormous negative reaction from the crowd. Christopher Wrigley is out first from the back, with a huge smile on his face and holding his arms out wide for all the world to see his navy blue jacket and red tie. He is shortly followed out by Claudia Frost and trailed by the weird acting Delia Black. In fact, Wrigley and Claudia are basically leading Black to the ring with what looks like a Twinkie.~
Smith: Is it me or is there something a little off about Delia Black?
Hood: Well, she currently is facing the wrong way, but other than that I dig the late 90’s goth aesthetic. Real trendsetting there.
~ Extra beefy referee Puff calls for the bell! ~
Smith: It’ll be Vortex starting off against Claudia Frost as the Influence make their return to OCW here. We haven’t gotten the full story just yet, but I’m sure it’ll be interesting.
Hood: It’ll also probably be sponsored by some whack products when we do learn about it.
~ Vortex locks up with Claudia in the center of the ring with a collar and elbow tie-up, but Claudia shows off her strength getting the upper hand and Vortex is greeted with a trip to her sideboob in a headlock. Vortex doesn’t do a lot of struggling at this point as Claudia rears back tighter with her grip pushing his face deeper into her side boob. Claudia notices the smile on his face at this point and releases the hold leaving Vortex sort of bent over and reluctant to stand straight back up ~
Smith: We might have a situation rising in that ring.
Hood: Yeah, Vortex might need to tag out right now. Hopefully, it won’t last four hours.
~ No worries about that, because Claudia straightens him right up in the ring with a swift kick to his fuzzy coin purse!! Puff tries to give her a warning for the low blow, but the Influence’s lawyer Wrigley gets on the ropes and prevents the warning citing a case from 1934 or something. Claudia turns around to tag out to her partner Delia, but Delia is too busy licking the turnbuckle from the outside of the ring.~
Hood: She’s making friends with the turnbuckle?!
Smith: Meanwhile, Vortex complete with swollen balls is able to tag out to Debris and from behind rolls up the unsuspecting Claudia Frost!!
1!
2!
TH--NO!
Smith: Debris almost had the three count there with that rollup!
Hood: He also had his whole face planted on her ass the entire time. Now he has something to brag about to Vortex when they’re sitting in their storm chasing wagon on I-70.
~ Claudia is right back up to her feet and connects with a running boot to the face of Debris! Debris springs back up and is caught by Claudia who flips him upside down with an exploder suplex. Debris gets back again and sure she follows that exploder suplex with another exploder suplex!! Claudia stands up and shows off the training she’s been doing with a solid flex pose. See? She’s put in the work. This gives Debris a chance to scramble back towards his corner and tag out to Vortex. ~
Smith: Claudia might be forced to fight this match two on one, because it appears right now that Delia Black is now biting the corner turnbuckle pad. She must have accepted the top rope as a friend, but that turnbuckle pad is not.
Hood: These things happen. But let’s talk about Tornado Alley here. Vortex already had the top half and then Debris had the bottom half, now they’re about to get their double team on here against Frost.
Smith: The smiles on their faces tell me they can’t wait.
Hood: I haven’t seen them this happy since I walked in on them watching Twister.
~ Things aren’t going well for Claudia as Tornado Alley has pressed their advantage and give Frost a series of double team moves, including a return on the suplexes with a double one of their own. Vortex, the legal man, signals towards Debris who immediately grabs Claudia by both legs and begins to wildly swing in that ring!! A giant swing that is, what were you thinking? Vortex takes his spot on the ropes and waits ~
Smith: This could be the Tornado Warning! If Vortex hits that leg drop this one could be all over and really spoil the Influence’s return to OCW!!
Hood: What the hell is going on right now?!
Smith: Wait, Wrigley’s up on the ring apron!! He’s distracting Vortex!!
Hood: And I think Debris has just hit his limit with spins.
~ Sure enough Debris drops the legs of Claudia and begins to act like he’s about to vomit. Claudia gets back up as well and the two stumble about the ring a little bit before Debris falls down in the corner while Claudia slaps the forehead of Delia Black. Delia doesn’t seem to know what’s going on as she stands there on the ring apron. Puff’s attention turns towards Wrigley now as Vortex leaps down from the turnbuckle. ~
Smith: Claudia made the tag out to her partner, but she’s just standing there on the ring apron.
Hood: At least she stopped chewing the turnbuckle.
Smith: Vortex has no idea what to do either. Do you pull her in or what?
~ Vortex goes to pull the arm of Delia to get her into the ring, but the moment he does that Delia unleashes a black mist right into his face!! Vortex covers his eyes in pain as the black mist drips down his face. The referee was too busy dealing with Wrigley to see it happen, but as the chonky referee spins around Claudia tags herself back in immediately and gives Vortex a double underhook DDT!! ~
Smith: Claudia Frost with the ‘Off with his Head’!! And now she flips Vortex over and goes for the cover…
1!
2!
3!
~ Debris would have gone for the break up, but instead he was too dizzy as the Influence pick up the victory. Claudia rolls off of the ring as Wrigley lures Delia Black off of the ring apron with a snack. ~
Belvedere: Here are your winners… THE INFLUENCE!!!!!
Smith: A tainted win there by the Influence, as the strange acting Delia Black unleashed that black mist into the eyes of Vortex.
Hood: Well, tornado season is a couple of months away. I’m sure his eyes will recover in time for that.
Smith: True and, well, it's not like they are very successful at it anyway.
Hood: Yea, blindness will at least be an excuse for their utter and total failure to capture anything remotely resembling a cyclone on film.
Smith: Mhm. On the flip side, The Influence...despite Delia's strange behavior...managed to snatch a victory. And I'd continue to rant about how they did it but given the BASTARDS are our tag champs...I'd say do what you can in this division.
Hood: Now you're talking!
Smith: Delia will also take to singles action in just SIX days at Decadence as she enters the New Year's Ball match with 7 other competitors. A hefty step up for someone who was missing only a short time ago.
Hood: Hey, no time like the present. If you want it, go and get it. She's just weird enough to pull it off, ya know?
Smith: Maybe, maybe not...we'll find out on Sunday!
# Camera. #
# Silence on the set. #
# Three, two, one. Action! #
~We cut backstage where we find Who’Re screaming “HELP! HELP! HELP!” OCW security rush forward, pushing through enhancement talent and faceless OCW employees to get to the scene of concern~
Smith: What is it? What’s going on?!
Hood: Who’Re must’ve found out that her name is literally Whore.
Smith: I seriously doubt that, Hood.
~Out camera fights through the commotion to find...OCW Champion PIC! He’s laid out, face down. The Knife Man drops to one knee to check on him...he slowly rolls PIC to the side and sighs...he finds the OCW Title underneath him~
Smith: PIC has been laid out...just like Thunder Knuckles was earlier tonight!
Hood: Thankfully the OCW Title was not stolen.
Smith: Yea, but his hat is missing!
Hood: Who cares about his fuckin hat.
Smith: I’m just saying. TK’s glasses were stolen and now PIC’s hat is gone.
Hood: Yea? Well I’m sure TK didn’t like the fact that PIC laid him out so he’s returning the favor...he laid PIC out and stole some of his shit. Turnabout is fair play, my man.
Smith: I think that’s pretty obvious. These two hate each other, Hood and it’s boiling over. Evidently TK’s injuries weren’t serious enough to prevent him from retaliating. Let’s just hope PIC isn’t seriously injured.
~The Knife Man and medics tend to PIC as we slowly fade out...back to ringside~
Smith: It’s a good thing Decadence is only six days away. With any additional time before their match, I’m afraid these two might literally kill one another.
Hood: LITERAL MURDER? You don’t say.
Smith: We’ll try and get you all an update on PIC as the night rolls on.
Hood: Oh...so you promise an update on PIC but nothing for TK? I see how it is.
Smith: TK is obviously fine. He laid out our champion.
Hood: Pssh.
Smith: It seems as though our PPV main event is going to hang in the balance throughout the night! Folks, when and if we get an update on the OCW Champion, we'll deliver it. Until then, let's take a commercial break!
The GREAT ILLUMINATUS returns in February!
~In the backstage area, The Big Bifford is standing with Earl the Popcorn Salesman.~
Earl: So let me get this straight.. Buffy, Aunt Bella, and Martha Stewart on still on the island with the islanders and none of that stuff in the second promotional video from the last show actually happened?
Bifford: Correct. That was another timeline. In that timeline, it was I and not PIKE who pinned Zybala. Also, I would like to point out casually that Pike has never pinned me in this timeline.
~Earl rolls his eyes.~
Earl: So what’s the plan for this tag team match?
Bifford: I’ll Biff End Dangerous Dan and pin him and become OCW Tag Team Champions.
Earl: Uh… what?
Bifford: The Danger Boiz. How many times have Arachne and I beaten them? Many.
Earl: What?
~The two men stare at each other in silence for a moment, glaring.~
Earl: Biff.. your partner is Alice Knight. You’re taking on B.O.B.
Bifford: Alice Knight will be my partner IF she is able to beat Arachne, Ehud, and Ehud’s definitely black grandson in THE GENTLEMEN’S GAMES.
Earl: This is so stupid.. when are we doing these games?
Bifford: Tonight Alice will take on ARACHNE, former GCWA Tag Team and Hardcore Champion in THE GENTLEMEN’S GAMES. IF she manages to beat him, and I doubt she will, she will then have to beat Ehud and his black grandson. And only then IF she is successful, will she be my tag team partner.
Earl: You are just planning to use her as a wacky side character in your story, aren’t you? Just a pawn?
Bifford: Damn right.
Earl: Biff.. she’s a OCW Hall of Famer and former OCW Champion.
Bifford: Arachne is a multiple time champion and Ehud has a win over Mario Maurako and Silver Cyanide on his record. We use Ehud and Arachne as lame side characters.
Earl: Biff, she’s in the Hall of Fame.
Bifford: The Hall of Fame means NOTHING now that Zybala is in it.
~Alice Knight and Arachne walk up to the two men. Arachne is wearing a mask, as usual, though fans of only modern OCW would likely be unfamiliar with him.~
Alice: So what’s going on this week?
Bifford: Well, we will go to Columbus, Ohio where the trial is taking place and we will run THE GENTLEMEN’S GAMES right out of the courthouse. The prosecution has finally finished calling their many witnesses to my many crimes that Kenny is charged with.. now the Defense begins.
~Alice looks at Bifford with confusion and then whispers toward Earl.~
Alice: There’s actually a trial?
~Earl nods his head. Alice looks around, looking slightly uneasy all of a sudden~
Alice: So like.. the whole chicken sandwiches thing.. that’s real? The CNN reports? The defense about people being prejudiced against eyeglass wearing people? This is all happening in a real court?
~Earl nods. Alice looks really confused.~
Bifford: Alice, you know Arachne..
Alice: I don’t think I do..
Bifford: This is Arachne.
~Arachne reaches out his hand and Alice shakes it.~
Bifford: This is the first round of THE GENTLEMEN’S GAMES.. the other two rounds, against Ehud and his definitely-not-blood-related grandson, will be held later this week in Ohio. But for now.. it’s Rock, Paper, Scissors.. are you ready?
~Alice Knight and Arachne both nod their heads.~
Bifford: I will call one, two, three, go and then you will throw your hand gestures. Are you ready? This is one round only, winner takes all.. one and done.
~Both competitors shake their heads.~
Bifford: One.. two.. three.. GO!
~Alice throws Rock and Arachne throws Scissors.~
Bifford: One point for Alice.. we are going best 2 out of 3.
Alice: What!? I thought it was one round only!? One and done?!
Bifford: I misspoke - two out of three.. One, two, three, GO!
~Alice throws Scissors and Arachne throws Paper. Bifford sighs audibly.~
Bifford: You disappoint as always, Arachne.. see you in Ohio, Alice..
~Bifford gives Arachne a dirty look and then walks away.~
Alice: So hold on.. if the trial is real.. are there really angry islanders developing technology and building an army on an island?
~Earl nods and Alice looks confused.~
Alice: Maybe I really don’t want to be involved in any of this.
~Arachne wanders off looking depressed, but he’s wearing a mask so its hard to tell.~
Alice: Do you actually have a secret popcorn seasoning recipe?
Earl: The secret, my dear, is that it’s all real.. it’s all real and it’s all really weird.
~Alice nods and walks away, leaving Earl alone. The camera focuses on Earl for a few seconds longer than it should before it goes to Smith and Hood.~
Smith: For the first time in my life I hope Alice loses.
Hood: Becoming a bastard, are ya?
Smith: NEVER! I just don't want her associated with that monster. So, I hope she loses those gentleman's games.
Hood: Oh. Well, that creates another form of history because for the first time in our lives we agree.
Smith: Alice must pass Bifford's gentleman's games if she wants to be his partner THIS Sunday at Decadence in the first ever RELEASE THE KRAKEN match for the OCW Tag Titles.
Hood: Oddly enough, I think if Alice does team with Bifford his odds of victory go down. I think he can take B.O.B. by himself...but if he's saddled with the psycho owl lady...think it'll cost him.
Smith: Alice, sadly, hasn't won gold in OCW in a long, LONG time. In fact, one of the last opportunities she had for gold was against Bifford for the OCW Title. And now...here we are...the possibility of these two teaming up.
Hood: This might be the biggest task of your career, Biff!
Smith: We'll find out in SIX days if the Hall of Fame duo A) teams together and B) can take down the seemingly unbeatable brotherhood of bastards. But now, we turn our attention to the future...one of the most impressive rookies we've seen in awhile steps back into the ring...The Standard is back in action and it's next!
The Standard (2-0) vs. Leviathan (0-1)
~Leviathan is in the ring. He doesn’t really LOOK like a Leviathan. More like an aging dude with kind of an attitude. Maybe more like a Leroy than a Leviathan. Anyway, he stands in his corner, trying to look ominous while Belvedere speaks~
Belvedere: Ladies and Gentlemen, the following contest is scheduled for one fall! Currently in the ring...Leviathan!!!
~Minimal reaction for Leviathan~
Smith: Leviathan being given one more shot to prove himself to the new owners.
Hood: He looks like an accountant. Why did we hire this guy? Uber Man is more menacing.
Smith: You gotta give someone a chance, Hood. You never know!
Hood: We know.
Belvedere: And, his opponent…
~Metal. Metallica. You know the sound. Black, white, and purple smoke tunnels twist in a convergence at the entrance. Cameramen sprint up the ramp with handhelds to get the right shot for you at home. A thunderous lightning strike hits the center. Standing in its wake is The Standard of Professional Wrestling. The place goes apeshit. He emerges fully with glee and a stern ready-for-business discernment in his lethally attractive stare. The man, the myth, the legend sprints out making the energy level spill over in the arena. Sliding into the ring Stan glides as if governed by different gravity. Running post to post he gathers all the energy up to use against this opponent. The Standard has graced us all with another lesson~
Belvedere: From Manhattan, New York...standing 6’4 and weighing in at 195lbs...The Standard!
Smith: And, The Standard back in action! He’s looking to run his record to 3-0...making a strong case as the first Newcomer of the Month recipient for 2023.
Hood: Yea, he hasn’t faced the toughest competition but that’ll get fixed on Sunday.
Smith: Yep, he’ll step into the ring against 7 legit competitors with a Craze Title shot on the line. Tonight should serve as a good warm up for that massive in-ring opportunity.
~Belvedere exits and the bell sounds. Leviathan leaves his corner and he stares, ‘menacingly’ at The Standard. The Standard waits for something to happen. Anything. Leviathan seems eager to try to summon some dark, unseen force to aid him in tonight’s match. But, like, nothing is happening~
Smith: Interesting.
Hood: Leviathan thought this was a staring contest, evidently.
Smith: Shockingly, we’ve never had one of those in OCW.
~Standard approaches Leviathan. He spins around and smacks Leviathan in the head with a heel kick!! Leviathan crumbles to the mat! The fans pop...finally some action! Leviathan is stunned...physically and mentally. WHERE ARE HIS POWERS? Standard stomps his heel right into Leviathan’s chest, sending the strange man rolling over, coughing. Standard grabs a handful of Leviathan’s hair~
Smith: No powers for Leroy today.
Hood: Bless that man, Leroy Jenkins.
Smith: Ahead of his time.
~Standard has Leviathan on his feet. He smacks him in the head with a standing claymore!!! The fans rise, knowing what’s coming. Leviathan stumbles into the ropes...he staggers forward and Standard takes him down with a stunned diamond cutter! Leviathan is down. He’s out! Standard makes the cover...Scruff slides in with the count~
1!
2!
3!!!!
~The bell rings~
Belvedere: Here is your winner...THE STANDARD!!!!!
Smith: The Standard with another dominating performance!
Hood: Okay, so he beat Parody Account. Whatever. Then he beat Steve Black. Impressive...but still, lacking in notoriety. Tonight? Another layup. This dude looks good...but I’m ready to see him against some real competition.
Smith: You’ll get that on Sunday as The Standard makes his OCW PPV debut in the New Year’s Ball match with a shot at the Craze Title on the line! He’ll have to defeat exciting young talent like Moonlight Rose, Diana Watts, Phoenix Lestrange, Killian Neville, and Delia Black!
Hood: And?
Smith: And an OCW star in Dylan Thomas...and...and...a Hall of Famer in Bob Grenier!
Hood: Now we’re talking. Let’s see what you got, Standard!
Smith: We’ll get just that THIS Sunday at Decadence LIVE on PPV!
~We cut backstage where AKB is standing by~
AKB: Urgent update, everyone. I’ve just been told that Sahara has left the building and seemed to be in solid spirits. I’m told she’ll be bordering a private flight home tonight where she hopes to rest comfortably inside the walls of her massive mansion…
Smith: Can we cut away from this nonsense?
~We cut away mid update to a shot of Who’Re~
Who’Re: Thanks guys! I just thought I’d break in with an update on OCW Champion PIC and Thunder Knuckles. I’ve been told both men are hurt...but they are refusing medical treatment. OCW is doing its best to keep these two apart as every finger backstage is being pointed at each man as to who perpetrated the attacks. I think I speak for management and all the OCW fans out there who are looking forward to Sunday when I say tonight’s show can’t come to an end soon enough.
Smith: Thanks, Who’Re. It’s clear tensions are boiling back there and there’s a very strong chance these two men injure one another to the point they can’t compete next week. Let’s hope that doesn’t happen.
Hood: That’s okay. If the match is off it just means Sahara headlines the PPV which might actually draw more buys.
Smith: And on that ridiculous note...let’s cut to commercial.
LIVE! Sunday, January 29th 2023!
FROM The OCW Arena
IN Key West, Florida
Craze Contenders Match
New Year's Ball match
Diana Watts vs. Killian Neville vs. Moonlight Rose vs. Delia Black vs. Dylan Thomas vs. The Standard vs. Bob Grenier vs. Phoenix LeStrange
Craze Championship
Speak Up Match
Harmon Egan (c) vs. SYNN
Tag Team Championship
Release the Kraken Match
B.O.B. (c) vs. Bifford & Alice
Paradigm Championship
Extremely Enforced Rules Match
Sahara (c) vs. Crash Rodriguez
OCW Championship
Ball Room Brawl
PIC (c) vs. Thunder Knuckles
~Zybala is backstage. He’s got his Hall of Fame plaque hanging on the wall. He’s admiring it. Behind him stands Cap Slock~
Cap Slock: SIR, WELSH TOLD ME THIS WILL BE YOUR OFFICE. AS MINORITY OWNER YOU WILL HAVE THE OPPORTUNITY TO PITCH IDEAS UP FOR WELSH TO GREEN LIGHT OR…
Zybala: Veto.
~Cap Slock nods. Zybala waves him off~
Zybala: Yea, yea, I know the drill. Thanks for showing me to my office, Captain.
~Cap Slock exits. Zybala whistles while turning to his desk which is much smaller than Welsh’s~
Zybala: Alright...I could sit in here all day or I could make stuff happen! Think I’ll go pitch a few of my ideas to Welsh.
~Mike removes a sheet of paper with his few ideas scribbled down. It falls all the way to the floor and keeps unrolling until it his the door to his office...which suddenly flies open. A pair of wheels roll over the list as we pan up to see Equality GM LORD ALLTON with the huge bodyguard known as Tank, behind him. The fans pop for them both.~
Zybala: Lord Allton! Tank!
Allton: Mike… Congratulations on the Hall of Fame. Absolutely well deserved my friend. And the Minority owner thing… But hey, listen I don’t know if Welsh, has informed you but there’s a reason that I haven’t done any Equalitys since before Christmas. But it’s also something I wanted to talk to you about to get one over on Welsh.
~Allton is about to tell Zybala the news when he notices the camera. He smiles, shaking his head~
Allton: Oh no…. You’ll find out in due time. Out you go Mr Cameraman.
~The Cameraman leaves and Allton’s bodyguard Tank shuts the door.~
Smith: Well this is an exciting development! The GMs of Outsiders AND Equality are putting their minds together backstage here at Massacre!
Hood: We can’t have those two off brand sodas infecting our Coca Cola! What is going on?
Smith: I don’t know but if Lord Allton is involved you know it’ll be well thought out and impactful.
Hood: I notice you didn’t mention Zybala.
Smith: I love Mike. Alright folks, it's time for tonight's Main Event...it's been a wild night. A very stressful, anxiety filled evening. So, let's see if we can get through this one, final match without anything else going awry. To the ring we go!
BAM G (0-0) vs. TLS & Mystery Partner (0-0)
~The fans are on their feet...ready to get rowdy for tonight’s Main Event! The final match before we turn our full and complete attention toward Decadence! Belvedere stands in the ring...he clears his throat and booms into the mic~
Belvedere: Ladies and Gentlemen, the following contest is a tag team match and it is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first…
~WHERE THE HOOD AT by DMX hits and the crowd pops for the rag-tag duo that nearly capture the OCW Tag Titles in 2022. Yes, I’m talking about the team led by an Online legend and his partner, an Outsider’s legend. It’s Bob Grenier and JAM G! JAM leads the way...he’s carrying a guitar and sporting a long, thick beard. Still got the mask, too. Bob is right behind him, puffing away on some large blunt...smoking flying from his mouth, leaving a nice trail in his walking wake as the duo reach the ringside area~
Belvedere: The team of Bob Grenier and JAM G...they are...BAM G!
Smith: BAM G back in action! Last week we saw Bob Grenier make quick work of All IC Bro. Now, he’s brought JAM G back and is looking to make a run at those tag titles.
Hood: Yea, well the top of that division is rough. Like toppling Mount Everest, taking those bastards out. But if anybody can get down and dirty with those assholes, it’s Bob.
Smith: That’s a fact.
Belvedere: And, their opponents…
~The fans quiet. They hush. They stand in wonder. Will TLS appear? And, if so, who is his partner?~
Smith: TLS has these fans...along with PIC and TK...constantly guessing.
Hood: His second main event in as many weeks. Whatever he’s doing, it’s working.
~The lights suddenly go out. A male voice screams, “WHO GRABBED MY ASS?” They suddenly come back no and TLS is standing in the ring! The fans pop! JAM G staggers, holding his guitar, ready to blast him. Bob chills in the corner, smoking away...there isn’t much in this game that bothers him anymore. TLS stands, stoic...looking out to the fans as they start to chant “TLS! TLS!”~
Smith: I don’t think it’s been intended...but these fans are starting to get behind The Lost Stranger!
Hood: He’s mysterious. He’s got them guessing. People like that.
Smith: And, as far as guessing goes...we’ve had all week to figure it out. Now, let’s see...who will team up with TLS!
Hood: Dude, we all know who it’s gonna be.
Smith: Is it true? Is Mike Zybala coming out of retirement to team with TLS for one last ride?
Hood: Normally, I’d say no way. No way would a legend come out of retirement after ONE FUCKING WEEK for some throwaway tag match. But, we’re talking about Mike Zybala here.
Smith: Let’s find out!
~TLS slowly turns toward the entrance ramp. The fans begin to chant “ZYBALA! ZYBALA! ZYBALA!” And then it hits~
~The fans go wild!~
Smith: Here he comes!
Hood: Seriously? What a fuckin joke!
~All is well until the curtain opens and we see mike ZYBALDA!!! The fans boo! And, instantly, the song shifts right into a very familiar lyric from a classic 80’s song~
The jig is up the news is out they've finally found me
~More booing as ‘Renegade’ by STYX plays. ZyBALDa heads down the ring, sucking down a can of Busch beer while smoking down a menthol cigarette. TLS just stares at him...no doubt he’s pissed but he won’t show his emotions. His eyes just watch ZyBALDa stumble down the ramp, toward the ring~
Smith: It’s Zybala’s uglier, fatter, and BALDER doppelganger...Mike ZyBALDa!
Hood: Haha...yes! TLS got the wrong Mike Z!
Smith: I don’t know how TLS is going to win the OCW Title if he can’t get the right Mike Z on the phone.
Hood: Really makes you wonder.
~Zybalda walks up the steps and stands in his team’s corner on the apron. He scratches his ass through his sweat pants before digging into the pockets and pulling out a tiny, chocolate donut. He eats is. TLS turns, just staring at him~
Belvedere: The team of TLS and...Mike ZyBALDa!!!
~More booing from the fans as TLS continues to stare at ZyBALDa. Belvedere exits in the background. We hear the bell sound. ZyBALDa looks at TLS and says, “What?” He finishes off his tiny chocolate donut and declares, “I’m not getting in there first. You called me, remember?” TLS just stares at him...until he’s blindsided via dropkick from JAM G!! TLS stumbles into his team’s corner. ZyBALDa throws his arms in the air, avoiding the tag. JAM G straightens TLS out and starts to chop away at the Oh Shit Contract Holder’s chest~
Smith: And here we go!! JAM G getting the early jump on TLS!
Hood: Man, I thought he’d become more of a pacifist down in Florida.
Smith: He apparently had a pavolovian type response to the sound of that bell.
~He grabs TLS by the arm and whips him across the ring...TLS charges into the opposing corner and hits hard!! Bob reaches out and starts to strangle TLS with the tag rope! Scruff runs over to stop him. They argue for a minute...JAM G hurries forward and grabs his guitar, which is lying on the apron. He brings it into the ring and prepares to hit TLS with it while Scruff is distracted~
Smith: BAM G already going for the cheap victory!
Hood: Why not? TLS has so much momentum in OCW right now. Take him out as quick as you can!
~TLS, throat freed from the tag rope, sees the guitar high in the air and he throws a foot into JAM G’s gut!! JAM G doubles over and drops his guitar. TLS picks it up and he checks the weight. He looks down at JAM G and reaches back to break the guitar over JAM’s back...but Scruff reaches up and grabs the guitar, pulling it away from TLS!! The fans BOOOO!! TLS turns around, annoyed! Scruff threatens a DQ. TLS tries to point out that they tried to hit HIM with the guitar...but Scruff won’t hear it, tossing the guitar out of the ring. TLS then falls to the mat...JAM G rolls him up!!! Scruff slides in with the count~
1!
2!
Kick Out!!!
Smith: Whew, way too close for comfort if you’re TLS.
Hood: Lots of fuckery going on. Classic BAM G.
Smith: Yea, Bob might act like he’s mellowed and isn’t as violent and treacherous as he once was...but don’t let that fool you. He’s as mean and calculating as ever.
~The force of TLS’ kick out sends JAM G spinning through the air, landing on his back near the ropes. TLS is back on his feet. He looks at ZyBALDa, who is finishing off his menthol cigarette before unleashing a massive belch. TLS turns back toward JAM G. He grabs the Outsider’s legend by the beard, dragging him toward the center of the ring. Violently, he pulls JAM G forward, hooking his head for a DDT...but JAM G blocks the move. JAM G pushes TLS off...TLS hits the ropes...JAM G jumps up for a hurricanrana but TLS holds on...he lifts JAM G up for a powerbomb...but JAM G spits in TLS’ face!!! TLS stumbles...JAM G twists and turns and takes TLS over with a hurricanrana!!!! TLS lands hard! JAM G scrambles to his corner and he tags Bob Grenier into the match! A pop from the fans! TLS gets to his feet...stunned but far from wounded. He looks over and sees Bob heading his way. The two OCW icons get in each other’s face~
Smith: Bob Grenier...a former OCW Champion...he’s enshrined within the OCW Hall of Fame. Two achievements, I’m sure TLS would love to attain.
Hood: Yea, kinda hard to believe, given recent times that Bob’s there and TLS isn’t.
Smith: Bob earned it. He helped carry this company in 2015 and he’s still got the talent and the fire to return to the top.
~Bob spits his blunt to the mat and throws a right hand into the face of TLS. TLS responds...the two men break out into a brawl with the fans going wild. Bob’s fists outweigh the ones thrown by TLS. TLS stumbles into the ropes...Bob whips him off...TLS sprints across the ring, hits the ropes again and eats a knee into the gut!! TLS flips over, landing on his ass, grimacing in pain. Bob grabs him by the hair and pulls him to his feet...swiftly, Grenier swings TLS up off the mat before driving him down into the canvas with a scoop slam! TLS arches his back in pain before Bob flattens him out with a double foot stomp into the chest. TLS is down with Bob standing tall~
Smith: Bob Grenier is in that ring and he’s doing work!
Hood: No shit. TLS needs to pull out one of his magic tricks...that or see if he can use his Oh Shit contract to get out of the ring and avoid this beat down.
Smith: Or...and stop me if this sounds crazy...he could tag his partner into the match.
Hood: LOL that IS crazy!
~TLS crawls for the ropes...he gets to his knees, holding onto the middle rope before Grenier slams a knee into his back. Bob pulls TLS up and shoves him into the ropes...TLS responds with a quick thumb to the eye! Bob stumbles, holding his face in pain. TLS instinctively turns to tag in his partner...only to have ZyBALDa yell out “CRAMP!” He walks down the steps gingerly, holding his right thigh...he stumbles into the barricade, wincing, talking about his cramping leg...as he reaches into a fan’s plate and snags a couple of buffalo wings. TLS shakes his head…looks like he’s gonna have to do this himself. He turns back around only to get met with a headbutt from Bob! TLS falls back into his corner. Bob hops onto the middle rope and he slams his fist into the head of TLS several times before leaning in and biting TLS on the forehead!! Scruff rushes in to get Bob off of TLS. Bob finally relents and hops back onto the mat...TLS charges forward...Bob ducks and lifts him up high with a back body drop! Again, TLS slams into the mat with force...he rolls over, holding his back~
Smith: Yep, he’s going to have to treat this as a handicap match.
Hood: That’s what he gets for stealing the belt a few weeks back. YOU NEVER STEAL A BELT
Smith: Doesn’t ever seem to turn out well for the thief, that’s for sure.
~Realizing he’s in trouble, TLS struggles to one knee, trying to get to his feet before Bob can reach him...but Bob’s already there, slamming a fist into The Stranger’s head. He pulls TLS to his feet...BUT TLS TRIES TO TAKE HIM DOWN WITH THE DREADED SMALL PACKAGE!! The fans rise!!! Bob blocks it!! He hoists TLS up and throws him over with an Exploder Suplex!!! TLS hits hard, flipping over onto his front, down on the canvas. Bob takes a second...sitting on the mat, shaking his head as if to say ‘whew, that was close’~
Smith: The dreaded small package. One of the most devastating finishers of 2022.
Hood: Classic OCW, baby!
Smith: Bob was THAT close to succumbing to it. That’s the thing about TLS...you can’t ever let your guard down around him. He’s the most calculating wrestler we’ve ever seen.
~Grenier pops back to his feet. TLS remains down. He snares TLS by the hair, yanking him to his feet. TLS throws a back kick, clipping Bob in the knee!! Grenier stumbles back, center of the ring. TLS hits the ropes, he bounces off and he charges forward with a lariat...but Bob kicks TLS in the arm, spinning him around. He grabs him by the waist, hoists him up and drops him with a German Suplex!!! TLS reaches for his head and neck, rolling around, kicking his legs in pain...Bob returns to his feet and he heads for his corner, tagging JAM G back into the match~
Smith: Bob maintaining control...but TLS still has some fight in him.
Hood: Yea, he hasn’t hit the ‘big one’ yet. Bunch of impact moves but nothing strong enough to keep TLS down.
Smith: And now he’s bringing JAM back into the match.
Hood: Don’t really get that...kinda like having Mike Tyson tagging Joe Glass into the match to finish things off. But, maybe JAM’s improved enough to handle this situation.
Smith: There’s only one way to find out.
~Bob remains in the ring, pulling TLS up and kneeing him in the gut. He then hooks TLS for a suplex...he hoists TLS into the air….JAM jumps onto the top buckle and he leaps off, colliding with TLS as Bob falls backwards...a suplex/crossbody combo!!! The crowd pops for the move!! Bob dives out of the ring...JAM G hooks the leg...Scruff slides in~
1!
2!
3...NO!
Smith: So close! TLS barely gets the shoulder up!
Hood: Okay, finally a high impact move. One more and this should be over with.
Smith: Can JAM G finish him off...can the Outsider’s legend take that next step toward becoming a legit OCW star!
~JAM G is back on his feet. Bob stands in their corner...JAM turns toward his Hall of Fame partner. Bob yells, “You got this, Eddie! Stay focused! Don’t let him fool you...finish it off!” JAM nods, turning back toward TLS~
Smith: Bob knows, he knows JAM needs to succeed in moments like this if their team is ever going to reach the top of the tag division.
Hood: Yea, you simply can’t win those tag titles by carrying dead weight. You can get yourself to a tag title shot...but you can’t ever win it.
Smith: Nope, the division might be paper thin but the tag champs are always, always going to be a tremendous obstacle to overcome.
~JAM G seems a little apprehensive as he pulls TLS to his feet. He quickly hooks TLS’ head under his arm and drops him with a quick bulldog to the mat, keeping TLS down. He returns to his feet. He stomps on TLS a few times, keeping him down. Bob urges him on. JAM pulls TLS back to his feet and slugs him with a forearm to the side of the head. TLS spins around. JAM hoists him up and drops him with an Atomic Drop!!! TLS stumbles into a neutral corner, leaning against the buckles. JAM G looks around...his confidence is growing~
Smith: He’s doing it, Hood! He’s hanging in there with one of the best OCW has to offer!
Hood: Yea, but he can’t get all high and mighty just because he can see the finish line. Gotta finish strong!
Smith: Indeed!
~JAM pulls TLS out of the corner and spins him around. He punches him in the face. He chops him across the chest. TLS teeters back and forth. JAM G stands proudly, brimming with confidence. He begins to strum an air guitar...he starts to sing a song he’s making up on the spot about TLS~
Smith: JAM G is feeling some creative inspiration.
Hood: Oh for fuck’s sake! Write those lyrics later!
Smith: A true artist never lets inspiration wait. You must grab it while it’s there!
Hood: He’s not a true artist. HE’S JUST ANOTHER MASKED GUY
~JAM starts to sing his new song to TLS...but TLS takes him over with the SMALL PACKAGE! Bob slaps the top buckle with frustration! Scruff slides in with the count! JAM kicks his legs, trying to get free...but TLS has it locked in real tight~
1!
2!
3!!!!
~The bell rings! The fans go wild~
Belvedere: Here is your winner...THE LOST STRANGER!!!!!
Smith: He did it! He shocked JAM G with the dreaded SMALL PACKAGE!
Hood: Fuckin JAM G! The attention span of a Zybala!
~Grenier hits the ring and goes after TLS...but the wily vet rolls out of the ring to prevent being a victim of a post match beat down. Bob is left to stand in the ring, staring down at TLS...frustrated. TLS, outside, leans against the barricade, nursing his wounds. ZyBALDa walks up, ready to celebrate...but TLS kicks him in his ‘cramping’ leg and slaps him across the face, knocking him to the ground. The fans go wild. Grenier points down at TLS, tossing a few choice words his way. TLS just stares up at the Hall of Famer before turning his back to him and heading up the ramp~
Smith: Grenier isn’t done here. It definitely appears as though he wants another shot at TLS.
Hood: Can you blame him? He dominated the entire match only to watch JAM G lose it for him.
Smith: He’s got a big heart. He’s doing his best to turn JAM G into something here in OCW...but at what cost? His career has clearly struggled since he incorporated JAM into his life.
Hood: I mean, it’s his call. But at some point you gotta call a spade and spade and say “Damn, I guess there’s a reason this fucker wrestled in Outsiders for so long.”
Smith: It’ll be interesting to see how all this plays out, no doubt. But, as far as Bob goes, he looks as good as ever.
Hood: Big year in 2023 for Bob. I can feel it!
~Bob helps JAM to his feet and, rather than admonish him, he tries to instruct him, explaining what he did wrong. Meanwhile, we see TLS walk through the curtain with a purpose~
Smith: Bob continuing to mentor JAM. You love to see it.
Hood: TLS sure is putting that power walk to use. You think he has to use the restroom?
Smith: I honestly don't know, Hood. But he definitely appears like a man who has somewhere to be.
Hood: A man with a plan.
Smith: Alright, that just about wraps it up here...
Hood: Uh oh...why did you stop talking
Smith: ...hold on!
~Hood grabs the announce table~
Smith: Not literally, you idiot! I’m being told we’ve got action out in the parking lot!
Hood: We’ve always got action going on out there...haven’t you seen some of Sugar’s women prowling about when the show’s let out?
Smith: Not THAT kind of action! Let’s cut to the parking lot...right now!
~We cut to the parking lot to find AKB and The Knife Man trying to talk some sense into two men who are throwing haymakers at one another. Cap Slock is present, doing his thing~
Cap Slock: GENTLEMEN, PLEASE! SAVE IT FOR SUNDAY!
~Fans are gathering around as we get a good look at the two brawlers...it’s PIC and Thunder Knuckles!!! They are trading heavy right hands...each taking their turn, leaving their mark. Both men are furious...their anger suppressing any pain the punches might be causing~
Smith: It’s our main event, Hood! Both competitors are trying to kill each other in the parking lot!
Hood: Yea? Well, PIC started it! He laid TK out first!
Smith: And then TK retaliated...which I’m sure PIC didn’t appreciate. And now...here we are...it appears our main event is underway six days early!
~TK slings PIC into the back of a white van. PIC hits hard. TK rushes forward with a right fist...but PIC dodges...TK’s fist slams into the back of the white fan, leaving a round, red smudge. PIC grabs TK by the hair, trying to ram him face first into the doors but TK slaps PIC in the balls, paralyzing him. He then rams PIC head first into the doors, leaving an even larger round, red smudge. Red and blue lights start to flash against the vehicle and the two brawlers. The Key West police have arrived~
Smith: And Marcus Welsh has called the police! He has no choice...these two men are going to decimate each other. He can’t risk having the main event ruined!
Hood: Oh man, can you imagine how brutal that main event is going to be?
Smith: Probably the most violent event that’s ever taken place inside a ball room.
~Police swarm, pulling TK and PIC apart. TK’s hands are bloodied...his face battered. PIC’s face is bloodied...his teeth stained...he spits some blood at the ground, trying to fight his way toward TK. TK talks some shit, egging him on. They are dragged farther and farther apart as we see Welsh instructing the police on what to do~
Smith: I don’t think they’re going to jail...at least not yet. Welsh just needed the extra manpower.
Hood: Yep. He’s not gonna file any fucking charges on his two top wrestlers 6 days before a pay per view.
~The situation is deescalating. It’s clear the major drama is over. TK yells, “Bring my sunglasses to the ppv you soccer mom hair wearin bitch!” PIC shouts back, “Well you can keep my hat to cover up that ridiculous mullet of yours!” TK doesn’t like that insult, trying to fight his way through the cops to get at PIC...but it’s no use. There are too many men. PIC is dragged toward the arena with TK being dragged out further into the parking lot. As they separate, we see a man in the background heading for the white van~
Smith: I think someone told that fan that his van was in danger of being destroyed.
Hood: That’s a pretty big fan.
Smith: Yea, he looks like he could wrestle. Maybe he’s here for a tryout?
~The man reaches the front door of his van. We zoom in closer on him...he opens up the door and turns around...he’s wearing PIC’s hat and TK’s sunglasses~
Smith: Wait a minute!
Hood: He’s a fuckin thief!
~He takes them off, tossing them into the van. He reaches into his glove compartment...we zoom in to see the OH SHIT CONTRACT. He turns around, giving us a full shot of his face...and it’s none other than TLS!!! The fans inside the arena pop. TLS hops into the van, he fires it up and he drives off...on the side we read ‘SLAM BUSS.’~
Smith: It’s TLS! He has PIC’s hat and TK’s sunglasses!
Hood: Wait a minute…
Smith: He was the attacker, Hood! He laid TK and PIC out! He got them at each other’s throats! And, he’s got the Oh Shit Contract!
Hood: Fuckin hell. All this time he was pulling the strings. Now he’s got those guys ready to murder each other...which means.
Smith: Regardless of who survives...TLS will be the winner. They’ll do so much damage to each other that he’s assured a successful cash in!
Hood: This is some next level shit by TLS. Looks like he finally, after all these years, came to play.
~PIC and TK are still unaware...as is everyone else. The chaos of getting them separated created too much confusion for anybody but the viewers and announcers to witness TLS. We get one final aerial shot of TK being restrained deep within the parking lot...PIC being dragged back inside the arena...and the Slam Buss pulling out of the parking lot with TLS behind the wheel...~
Smith: And that’s it, folks! We’re out of time! We’ll see you all THIS Sunday at Decadence!
Hood: Gonna be wild!
Smith: See you then!
~We fade out~